from time to time, but more often when I'm depressed. My birth mother became pregnant with me when she was 38 years old and had a relationship with a close friend (she was in a bad marriage, she should have married this man in the first place). She "went away" to another state and had me, then gave me to my mom and dad who were friends of hers. She stayed in touch with my family her whole life, so in a nutshell I was lied to by 3 people [bio dad was not told] for over 20 years and inherited serious mental health problems from both of my biological parents. So yeah, the thought comes up a lot. I don't dare tell my mom this.