I would try asking about movies they've seen lately, books they've read, or if they're doing anything fun for summer (once it gets closer).

 

the universe. time, space, multi-dimensionality stuff. what it would be like to be each other (e.g. try to reach a mutual awareness of the experiential gap that exists between her and you, and in doing so become closer, or at least more sensitive to that gap. not many people do this, so, once accomplished, it has the potential to be kind of bonding. and bonding does seem to be what you're after). relate the most meaningful experiences one has had so far (e.g. the formative experiences). talk about the directions of things. you, her, components of the world, the whole world (and in both directions too, past and future!). but also, to be grounded, talk about now. about where things are now. where one sits emotionally, how one sees oneself. the struggles of day to day life. yeah, that's the point where you can either 1) leap into the vast sea of psychological and cognitive phenomena that accompany in the moment human perception, or 2) literally talk about the here and now - like by noticing something she is wearing or something curious in the surroundings, be it in a comment about the utility of some inanimate thing or speculations about the motives of a person walking by.

a good question to start with might be 'how is life?' or 'what do you think about life?'.

 

This is great.

 

You can talk latterly about anything. if she is cute tell her - Oh you're so cute" Where did you finish primary school? Do you have brothers or sisters? What movies do you like?
Look at this guy omg he's got so fanny jacket....

Inspiration for talk is everywhere. If it is rains tell them "oh this rain is so boring" I like sea and sun and you? Etc .

 

i just feel like if i talk about anything other than school, they will be like why is this kid talking to me?

 

It is weird. If you want to make small talk, you should discuss class/school related things. But it sounds like you want to flirt with her. Can't help you there.

 

The weather LOL!

 

Think of a really popular show both girls and guys watch. Them start the convo with "Hey did you see last nights of (Insert Show name here)? But make sure you watch the show before and really learn it so you dont get put on the spot.
Also you can find out what she needs help with in class and offer to help her from there and then she comes over and some convo will just randomly evolve outside of the school work.
Theres many options.

 

Here is a crazy idea: Talk to a girl like she is human being.

 

im sorry but im not very good at talking to human beings. This forum is called social anxiety support. im sorry i cannot talk to people like normal people can.

 

Gossip and what people are wearing. Things you disagree with/agree with in an assigned book. Ask questions about one of their hobbies, saying you want to get into that too. There's really no one-size-fits-all icebreaker, depends on the gal's personality.

 

any tips on breaking her away from her friend she always sits next to in class? it would kind of be awkward if i talk to just her and not her friend. (her friend was also in the class we shared in the previous quarter)

 

this is where your social skills come into play...u gotta drive the convo away from school and into her personal life. when she starts talking about her, find something in common, then from there all you need to do is ask her out to a place you both would enjoy.

 

its a fact that people are naturally self interested. Use that to your advantage and try to figure out what her interests are, things she is passionate about. Dont just ask her directly, learn this stuff by asking questions about her past, what she is doing today, etc. here some examples:

"what are you doing today?"

"did any sports or clubs in highschool?"

"what are you doing this weekend?"

"What do you do for fun?"

"why did you choose your major?"

At all times, always listen.Try to talk about what is on her mind at the current moment.

 

its a fact that people are naturally self interested. Use that to your advantage and try to figure out what her interests are, things she is passionate about. Dont just ask her directly, learn this stuff by asking questions about her past, what she is doing today, etc. here some examples:

"what are you doing today?"

"did any sports or clubs in highschool?"

"what are you doing this weekend?"

"What do you do for fun?"

"why did you choose your major?"

At all times, always listen.Try to talk about what is on her mind at the current moment.

unless your a mindreader, i dont see how u can do that.

 

i don't talk to girls in school, it's as simple as that. whenever i try it just gets so stiff. also i'll be nervous, what with the stutter and all that. getting a lot of weird looks from strangers when i stutter, and also some people just stop listening whenever i stutter, so eh, it's best just to talk to friends i guess. (not really)

also i have this tendency of feeling annoying and "in the way" whenever i try to start talking about something with girls. i know i will probably die alone if i keep thinking this way, maybe i should try to change it? whenever i try i just get let down, though.

 

Well it starts mostly with school as a topic and then as the conversations flow more topics are brought up , like what she is up to these days or i usually comment about her facial expressions like " Hey you look happy today , anything interesting?" or if she looks sad i just say "What is the matter".

 

" Hey you look happy today , anything interesting?" or if she looks sad i just say "What is the matter".

I hate when people say this to me..
You look happy> "why do I always look sad?"
You look sad>"I'm not, I'm just thinking.."

Sorry don't like those..

 

any help with talking to her while she is always sitting by her good friend? all 3 of us were in the previous quarters class, so it would be awkward if i ignored the other girl and just talked to the girl i like.

and thanks for all of the help so far.

 

Well bring her good friend up in the convo. Ask her how she did in the previous class. Ask her if she passed/failed. You have to find a way to befriend her or at least talk to her as well. You can't just ignore her because then that would be seen as rude by her and her friend. Make some funny comment about your surroundings. If you can show them you're funny then they will more than likely enjoy being around you. Girls love to laugh, trust me on this. I've never heard of girls hating a funny guy. Also, always remember that girls are very emotional, so try to ask them how they feel about things. Ex. "Do you like this class?" or "How do you feel about the weather outside?".

Here is a good link on how to be funny+cocky. Girls love a guy that can be both.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=16966

 

thanks everyone so far for the help. I'm kind of looking forward to monday to see her again and hopefully strike up a nice conversation.

 

Nothing much really they're usually a waste of my time.

 

What do you talk about to start making connections that might lead to an actual friendship (instead of just an academic acquaintance) or maybe even a romantic partner.

Ask them how was their weekend. See what they like to do with their spare time and what they do for fun. See if you can relate to that stuff. Ask her if she is seeing anyone and if she would like to go out on a coffee date.

 

i just say hi do you have a boyfriend ? that seems a bit odd.

 

Talk to her about videogames. *****es love videogames.
Oh wait, are we supposed to be serious here? Nevermind that's just me.

To be honest, just act like you're talking to a friend or a buddy or something(I know I know it's hard sometimes).

If something abnormal happens and you get the chance to talk, tell her she has nice hair, and then ask her what her name is. Also, if you don't like the teacher, complain about the teacher. Chances are she doesn't like him either. Then just go on with the conversation.

If something doesn't sprout up from there just work at it little by little.

 

Ez, get her number and then u can start talking about other stuff through text or phone! Just b like, "hey, do u want to exchange numbers incase one of us misses class and needs to catch up" or smthng, and then u can change gears on her and get to know her

 

so i've gotten girls numbers but purely based on an academic level. So then do i just text her out of the blue about something not related to school? that would seem weird, and she will probably ignore me or hesitantly respond.

 

"stuff"

 

im totally gonna try this today! jk.

 

A girl in my class asked for my opinion about some good time-wasting games. I should've said World of Warcraft and ruin her life forever but I'm not that sadistic.

 

A bit of an essay.

Hi, I'm a straight girl, just so were clear.
The best and most cliche advice anyone can give you is to be yourself.
What are you into? What sort of music? Or films?
Ask her what shes into?
What sort of things would you talk to your boy mates about? The most attractive thing for me is when a guy can talk to me like he talks to his friends. My boyfriend and I are the best of friends, and we talk to each other like we'd talk to our other friends.
There is no set way or rules to talk to a girl. Just be yourself and relax about it. She's just a person, like you.
Don't try to impress, you don't need to act like anyone else but YOU.
x

 

Hi, I'm a straight girl, just so were clear.
The best and most cliche advice anyone can give you is to be yourself.
What are you into? What sort of music? Or films?
Ask her what shes into?
What sort of things would you talk to your boy mates about? The most attractive thing for me is when a guy can talk to me like he talks to his friends. My boyfriend and I are the best of friends, and we talk to each other like we'd talk to our other friends.
There is no set way or rules to talk to a girl. Just be yourself and relax about it. She's just a person, like you.
Don't try to impress, you don't need to act like anyone else but YOU.
x

thanks for the help! that is some great info.

Too bad the girl im talking about didn't show up to class today, i was totally mentally preparing myself the whole walk to class to talk to her.

 

I find this discussion very useful. I had a terrible case of this today. A girl I kind-of-regularly have small talk with in class(es) knows my name. Today, we talked for maybe 30 seconds on small random little topics, but we were both early for class by like 10 minutes until class started. So it was just me and her alone, her desk basically next to mine. After the first 30 seconds of just talking about school stuff, I just stared at the wall. This kind of crap sure has the ability to ruin what is supposed to make university such a great experience ( what a load of b.s. that was...).

 

Sexual Intercourse.

 

I was getting real good and chatty with one girl I like in college. It dawned on me she might treat everyone with the same level of enthusiasm because she's very bubbly, I'm attracted to really upbeat and intelligent girls and that's her alright, but maybe not. Maybe maybe she treats everyone that way.

The other day I found out it doesn't matter. Her Facebook lists a boyfriend.. AHHHHHHH, but at least I broke the spell of silence I guess. You talk to girls about books if they like them, ask what they did over the week, a special topic of ours was being surprised at the gossip going around in the class, and one time I accidentally screwed her over on a quiz and we laughed about that.

I swear, every girl in college already has a boyfriend. It doesn't make sense because the college I go to is almost 70% female.