I understand how you feel. I really don't like my voice at all and talking on the phone makes me really nervous too. My voice doesn't sound girly at all. I am embarrassed because of my voice so I really try not to have people hear me talk. It really sucks to feel embarrassed because of my voice though. I am quiet too so people have a hard time understanding what I am saying.

 

I don't particularly like using the mics either. Especially since my friends tend to want to engage in small talk while playing.

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Yeah it really sucks :c I hope we can eventually overcome this.

Oh I forgot to mention but I also have a speech impediment so that also really makes me hesitant to speak. I can't pronounce R's and th's are sometimes messed up.

 

This might come off the wrong way but I've heard girls with that kind of speech impediment and found it endearing. I am biased because I myself have a stutter... still, I think others might feel the same way. People who are self-conscious don't want to feel different but sometimes the differences are part of what someone likes about you. Especially once they've gotten to know you and had a chance for you to grow on them.

 

I'd hope that would be what most people thought of speech impediments but I can't help but be paranoid that won't be the case. I've read some story on reddit about a kid who had a speech impediment get bullied on voice chat until two people spoke up to intervene. On one of the games I wouldn't like to actually voice chat on. Thats a worse case scenario though I shouldn't think about it like that.

 

Try it lol, i used to be too scared to try voicechat. But thrn i started anonymously voicechatting 12 year olds and kids, when i was like 15. After only a matter of days i could start voice chatting people my own age. I still felt anxious but i sort of adjusted too.

 

+1

Best therapy in this situation is exposure. If you want an "easy" first step I wouldn't mind voice chatting with you to help you out.

 

Well if you play multiplayer games it's pretty much mandatory. I'm sure you'll adjust if you keep at it. And if these people are your friends they shouldn't(technically) judge you for your speech problems.

The worst communities are the moba and FPS games like Overwatch. That's where the filth of the filth hangs out. But in MMOs people are(usually) nicer.

 

Future wife is that you? JK

I also have a speech impediment. I've been online gaming for 11 years and rarely use my Mic. I used my Mic a few times and my teammates kept asking What because they had a hard time understanding me.

 

This seems like the same thing as the phone phobia that plagues most of SAS. One woman who I have known for 6 years from SAS and met in person, refuses to call me. She will only do text or email. She tells me that she doesn't even like calling her husband (who she met after we had a lack of romantic chemistry).

I give my phone # out to everyone who PMs me, but only a single digit percentage call, and even then most need to be intoxicated to some degree to do so.

Stacey, my honey bunny, who will be moving 875 miles to be with me is a rare exception. We can talk for hours and she doesn't need any alcohol to do so.

 

It's much MUCH harder for women to be taken serious online than it is for men but you just gotta learn to ignore the idiots. I used to be pretty scared talking on mic too but you keep doing it over and over until it becomes second nature. Just think of it as a South Park episode and don't take it too seriously. If someone starts harassing you then just laugh it off or play along. Either way, have fun with it.

 

I remember the first time I talked on a mic. I was so nervous that the guy i was talking to couldn't even understand what I was saying lol but it felt so good and after that i couldn't stop **** talking people haha. I would recommend just saying hi and then say you have family over and can't really talk. And the next time just chime in from time to time. Before you know it no one will shut you up😆 JUST DO IT!

 

Thanks so much everyone for your responses! I really appreciate the helpful and supportive advice I have gotten from everyone. Yeah MoBas and Fps games are definitely toxic so that's a huge factor in my hesitation. I'm afraid that some friend of a friend in a voice chat might get toxic at me. I also can't really handle criticism that well if it's spoken. I've probably chosen the wrong games to get into but I can't help it. I enjoy the games too much to let the community weigh me down. As for MMOs I haven't played one in 7 years and it never had voice chat. I guess I should really just go for it in joining a voice chat next time a friend asks and I'll just tell them about my SA. I still live with my parents due to my SA making it hard to go apply for jobs and earn a living so I'm paranoid they might ask me who I'm chatting with aha. I've had them ask me that even when I'm just watching a stream or talking to myself- that would be embarrassing

 

I've been dealing a similar speech impediment, too. Rhotacism is the fancy name for it.

I rarely use my mic in games. One, because I'm terrified and two, I don't like idle chitchat in the middle of match. I mainly play on Xbox and its Xbox Live Party feature helps. Only my friends (whom I'm comfortable talking to) and I can hear one another.

I would suggest you do something similar. Isolate yourself and your friends from the general public (via Skype or a party chat feature). It'll still be scary at first but at least only a handful of people (who should be more accepting if they're your friends) will hear you.

 

Maybe you can record yourself talking and try to get more comfortable with your voice? I also have this issue but I rarely play competitive team games so I don't feel the need to use a mic just yet.

 

let's chat anonymously on tinychat or something, just mic no cam

 

A surprising number of people have what I guess I would call somewhat odd voices (pitch, accent, speech impediment, etc), so I don't think any one stands out too much. It honestly gets easier with time and is a blessing to at least be able to come home to human company in games. Phone calls were getting easier around the same time, although the practice sure couldn't have hurt.

As for harassment, I feel like that's practically inevitable. It's inevitable in MOBAs, and it's inevitable as a woman. Doesn't mean it's right... but there are people out there who take not being able to socialize to a whole new level of crazy. Just stick close to your group.