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Have you ever becomed "obsessed" with someone?

28K views 85 replies 79 participants last post by  Deimos  
#1 ·
I typically become obsessed with people, or certain groups of people. I don't mean love or anything, but I'll sit around thinking "I wonder what they're up to..." even though they're not my friends and it doesn't matter what they're up to. This usually happens to a group of people that rejected me because of my SA, or if I failed to become friends with them because of it. I'll imagine myself doing the thing we would have done if I had become friends with them, like going to parties or whatever, wishing we could be friends, even though it's never going to happen and I'm just wasting my time thinking about it. If I'm angry, I'll imagine myself getting revenge on them in some way, like them needing my help for a task and I refuse to do it.

Does anyone else do this?
 
#2 ·
sometimes, its usually with people who stick out though, like if someone is very quiet, or has a awkward, but attractive look, or has strange clothes, ect. I will become increasingly interested in them. If they are overly friendly with me for no particular reason then that can do it to, that's only happened once in my life.
 
#3 ·
I’m very much like you! Sometimes I just tend to put my hopes on another person and at times it can be too much. I always feel like they can bring me happiness or fill a void and that’s when my obsession or rather infatuation starts. Especially if it’s someone shows any type of interest in me. If I feel wronged then like you I start to act vindictive towards them. Sometimes that’s why I tend to push people away so I don’t get too attached to them. I've been obsessed with this guy for a very long time...long story.
 
#73 ·
I'm very much like you! Sometimes I just tend to put my hopes on another person and at times it can be too much. I always feel like they can bring me happiness or fill a void and that's when my obsession or rather infatuation starts. Especially if it's someone shows any type of interest in me. If I feel wronged then like you I start to act vindictive towards them. Sometimes that's why I tend to push people away so I don't get too attached to them. I've been obsessed with this guy for a very long time...long story.
Thank GOD I'm not the only one who does this. At first I felt like I belonged in an insane asylum lol (I still sort of do at time). It's so painful talking about it, even with my therapist that I've been seeing since 7th grade.
 
#4 ·
I remember getting kind of upset at this girl from work because we were hanging out, having fun together and then this one night she had a party and didn't invite me. I heard about the party from a different co-worker talking about it to another co-worker. It happened the night before and they were talking about how hungover they were. I left work that day kind of bummed that she didn't invite me. And then I couldn't help but think hey I wonder how that party went and then I kind of pictured everybody getting drunk and having fun and me being left out but what can you do. Other then that I try to stay away from the people that don't want to hang out with me. I can't change for them, I won't allow myself to.
 
#6 ·
Not obsessed but I find myself incredibly envious of this girl I used to go to high school with. She's on my friend's list on Facebook. She seems so happy and just at ease with herself and her world. Her pictures are full of random adventures, not necessarily stupid partying pictures like everyone else's. She's everything I don't have the courage to be...yet.
 
#7 ·
When i was in high school i was obsessed with this girl Vivian, i thought she was the bell of the ball. But 2 yrs of longing for her didn't do me any good. When i finaly made my move she coldly turned me down. So i vowed never again give that much of my brain space to someone I barely know, or just about anyone. OH and i was so obsessed with Nirvana when i was younger!
 
#30 ·
Yay for Nirvana!! :) I definitely went through a Nirvana/Kurt obsession too lol.

But yeah, I get oddly obsessed with things. And I hate it, most of the time. For example, I had a teacher that I learned lives somewhere in my neighborhood. Whenever I go running now, my thoughts are always consumed with "oh my god what if he sees me?!??" and wondering what he would think if he recognized me. Every car that passes by could very well be his, in my mind. I don't even particularly like the guy, I just for some reason care what he thinks of me.

Also, whenever I develop a crush on someone, I get obsessed. That's a bit more normal, though, I think, although my crushes themselves are really not normal lol.
 
#10 ·
I hate to say this, but yes. There are a few people I knew from grade school who I end up thinking about nearly everyday; I don't really know why. I'll often find myself thinking about what would happen if I ran into them randomly. What they would think of me.

And there is also the occasional person who I'll become fascinated by. Usually it's someone who is unique in some way. But whenever I become obsessed with a person, I try as hard as I can to fight it. Otherwise, I feel like a stalker.
 
#34 ·
More importantly, for me personally, having these same thoughts become depressing after a while, because in a sense whenever I become fascinated by unique/talented people, the thoughts of comparison creep on morbidly. Comparing yourself to somebody who seems so much higher than you is enough to make you feel like crap at any time of the day.
 
#11 ·
I only did it once. I worked with this really beautiful woman who was from somewhere in Europe (I can't remember now). Anyway, she was really friendly with me when I talked to her and I interpreted this as her way of saying she may have been a little interested in me too.

I was too infatuated with her to notice she was really friendly with everyone and not just me. She was just a nice person. It took me a while to acknowledge the reality because I built my hopes up really high. I wouldn't say I was exactly obsessed with her. But it was definitely a one way thing and I was deluding myself.
 
#55 ·
I only did it once. I worked with this really beautiful woman who was from somewhere in Europe (I can't remember now). Anyway, she was really friendly with me when I talked to her and I interpreted this as her way of saying she may have been a little interested in me too.

I was too infatuated with her to notice she was really friendly with everyone and not just me. She was just a nice person. It took me a while to acknowledge the reality because I built my hopes up really high. I wouldn't say I was exactly obsessed with her. But it was definitely a one way thing and I was deluding myself.
Snap! Been there, possibly still there. Aw man. It's gutting. Some people are hard to understand I find
 
#14 ·
As much as I hate to say it, I think I'm obsessed with my ex-girlfriend. Not in a dangerous way, it's more of a patheticly sad way. I don't talk to her anymore unless she talks to me first, but I think about her all the time. And I have been obsessed with certain girls in my past.
I do have an obsessive personality, not just with girls or even people in general. Sports teams, certain foods, gambling, porn...etc.
 
#17 ·
obsessed...for me, slightly yes but not overboard crazy...if i keep wondering waht someone is up to its because im close to them in that point in time, they have qualities i wish to have, things they do i wish i was doing...things like that, i was never obsessed in the sense that i wish i was with that person myself

everything i want to be and do, i know i can accomplish anything, i just gotta get out the house more often! its that simple for me since i was an insanely social person in school, once i left i crawled into a shell and am now finally coming back out of it
 
#18 ·
I wouldn't call it obsession. When I was at school there was this very popular girl who used to talk to me sometimes in the beginning. One day in French class, and I was 14, she sat there poking fun at me for the hour's lesson. I was drawn to tears. Other girls laughed with her and encouraged her to keep doing it. She made really nasty comments about my looks, my hair, my clothes, and stuff. From that time on she felt she had the right to scream abuse at me and physically assault me without her getting into trouble. I was the shyest girl in the entire school and that was the reason why she did that. I would say that this girl was obsessed with me and I also think she was something else too. Whenever I look back on school she stands out and I think she made me become severely SA and have no self esteem or confidence.
 
#19 ·
God yes, all the time. I can't help wondering, what if... I study alongside amazing women with amazing personalities, but my social anxiety always holds me back from persuing anything past our basic friendships. It's these constantly missed opportunities that are fuelling this small obsession. Succeeding with SA will solve everything.
 
#25 ·
I wonder how much of this comes from not seeing things, people, etc as they really are, but how we want them to be - how much is idealization.

Just wondered, as I have a problem with this sort of thing too. unrealistic expectations, seeing things through (insert colour of choice)-tinted glasses, and so on.

At one point it got so bad I wondered if I have that borderline personality disorder thing.
 
#26 ·
Yes. It was terrible. Nearly ruined my life. It was hard work, but when I managed to put things in their proper perspective, and realized I have a habit of idealizing things, and accepted reality, it got a LOT better. I was finally able to stop crying about it, and move past it. I learned a quite a lot about myself through this event, so it wasn't a total waste of my time.
 
#28 ·
I've never been obsessed with someone in a creepy, stalker way but I have thought a lot about certain people.

When I get crushes on guys, I will think about the guy a lot. There is this one guy that I do have a pretty big crush on right now. He almost became an obsession (I was checking his facebook page multiple times a day and thinking about him all the time), but I stopped myself before it became an obsession ("this is silly"). I now still like that guy- I am just not obsessed with him (and never really was).

I also think a lot about people when they are nice to me. I don't become obsessed with them, but I do become interested in their lives and really want to be around them. I am just coming out of having social anxiety for the past 5 years and I am used to people ignoring me- not being really nice to me. When someone is nice to me, I won't become obsessed with the person, but I will think about them a little.

I also think about people in the past who were nice to me, but I turned away from because of the anxiety I had. I become sort of regretful of the past, but I know there is so much life ahead of me and all I can do is just move on. Sometimes I will also think about family members I haven't seen in a while.

I guess I just think about people- I don't really obsess over them.