Abso-bloody-lutely! This is one of the things that really makes me feel sub standard. Such a void in my life. The worst thing is, as you noted, it simply can't be fixed or replaced. Once you've missed this bus it's well and truly gone.

 

No, even though I left high school in the 10th grade. I didn't do proms, but I did move away from home and go to college/have my own apartment early and that was way better than prom. I could have done my teen years better had I not been shame-based and easily intimidated out of enjoying life. I did, however, feel like I missed out on my 20's. My teenage years from 16-20 were pretty good. But by the time I was 21 I was a fat recluse who felt terrible all of the time. I kinda picked up again with a few things in my late 20's for a minute, but nothing that would replace the carefree teenage years. I'm looking forward to my 40's. Not being younger so much as just having a good *** time.

 

No, not at all. I did all those things when I was "supposed to" be doing them.

 

I didn't go to the junior prom or senior prom. Never went to a single high school party. I didn't have my first kiss or lose my virginity in high school. I didn't have a single friend to have fun with and get into trouble with. All because of my social anxiety.

Now that my social anxiety is almost gone and I'm in my 30's I feel like I missed on being a teenager. When I watch John Hughes' movies like The Breakfast Club or any coming of age teen movie I feel this regret.

And now I've been dating younger girls (19+), smoking pot and stuff trying to reclaim lost youth but all in vain.

I feel like I want a rent out a hall and have it decorated like a prom and dance with a woman in a prom dress. lol

It's like the way Michael Jackson had trouble letting go of his lost childhood I have trouble letting go of my lost teenage years.

Anyone else feel like this?

oh,yes.. i missed out on my teenage years having close friends again like in middle school and just being young but am still in my 20s late 20s sadly. but am still trying to live a normal life going on a few dates, one or two parties,drinking and smoking.and enjoy it before am to old, lol but at some point you just have to accept that this is just the way things are going to be. either its due to SA or lack or resources (controlling family.money,education,car,inexperience etc..) some people just are not so lucky and the ones that are should appreciate the life and friends and experiences they have. you never know who or what can steal it all away.

 

I missed out on all the things normal teenagers and college kids did. Now I'm missing out on all the things people my age do. Looking back on it, it's my fault I missed out on life because I had no social skills or self-awareness. Now I know what I did wrong, but it's too late to change. I basically died years ago.

 

To some extent. I would say my only real year was the ninth grade. After that I moved to a new state and new school and my life got all screwed over.
I no longer had my old friends and I had trouble actually finding similar ones and really never did, not one. I miss my old friends.
But now that I have been in college for a few years things have changed.

Oh sorry just noticed this is in the 30+ thread

 

Yes, I was homeschooled, was not allowed to date, dance, wear style that was popular in any time of the 20th century, had to cover my hair, could not go swimming, and had to wait for my family to arrange a marriage for me, which I rebelled against.

I also have never seen a TV show (still to this day) did not have internet, never saw movies, all my books were pre-read for me to make sure they were appropriate (and sometimes most of the book passed but even references to holding hands with a person were crossed out with white-out) did not have radio, and could only listen to classical music or hymns.

I also was not allowed to talk to someone of the opposite gender for more than a couple of minutes. If I did, I was whipped with the metal end of a belt.

I finally got out when I was 27. They had taken to locking me in my bedroom.

 

Yes, I was homeschooled, was not allowed to date, dance, wear style that was popular in any time of the 20th century, had to cover my hair, could not go swimming, and had to wait for my family to arrange a marriage for me, which I rebelled against.

I also have never seen a TV show (still to this day) did not have internet, never saw movies, all my books were pre-read for me to make sure they were appropriate (and sometimes most of the book passed but even references to holding hands with a person were crossed out with white-out) did not have radio, and could only listen to classical music or hymns.

I also was not allowed to talk to someone of the opposite gender for more than a couple of minutes. If I did, I was whipped with the metal end of a belt.

I finally got out when I was 27. They had taken to locking me in my bedroom.

I just want to say that I'm really sorry and feel for your situation. That sounds like extremely hard way to grow up. I'm glad to hear you have got out of such a controlled and brutal environment.

For me, apart from the mass amount of bulling I received. life was pretty good as a teenager, I went to parties and had friends etc. The last 6 years though have been a completely different story, if I could redo my 20's.....

 

Nah, I was really rebellious and not at all sheltered by my parents. My parents took drugs and got divorced. It was all fairly wild, like breaking into buildings and vandalization. That may be one reason I really dont regret my teenage years, because through various events and decisions, I managed to really kick society in the ***. I am even a convicted felon from vandalizing a boyscout building. We broke into it and spraypainted the inside of it and trashed all the boyscout patches. It was federal property of the US government. We failed to realize that at the time. Its like vandalizing a police station. Lost my virginity to some promiscuous chick who had sex with multiple men at once. If I told everything I did then, your jaw would fall to the floor.

Strangely, this time period has no meaning for me. I dont see it as wasted at all. Whatever you do during teen years has no meaning in my opinion. You are too young for it to really even be considered lost time. The only thing to regret is not giving society a fight. I continue to fight society and feel good about it, marching against Monsanto, etc.

 

Nah, I was really rebellious and not at all sheltered by my parents. My parents took drugs and got divorced. It was all fairly wild, like breaking into buildings and vandalization. That may be one reason I really dont regret my teenage years, because through various events and decisions, I managed to really kick society in the ***. I am even a convicted felon from vandalizing a boyscout building. We broke into it and spraypainted the inside of it and trashed all the boyscout patches. It was federal property of the US government. We failed to realize that at the time. Its like vandalizing a police station. Lost my virginity to some promiscuous chick who had sex with multiple men at once. If I told everything I did then, your jaw would fall to the floor.

Strangely, this time period has no meaning for me. I dont see it as wasted at all. Whatever you do during teen years has no meaning in my opinion. You are too young for it to really even be considered lost time. The only thing to regret is not giving society a fight. I continue to fight society and feel good about it, marching against Monsanto, etc.

Good view point.

 

Yeah, I want to say people are too into being normal, like they want to go to the prom. Even when I was a teenager, I didn't want to be normal. I never tried and it never occurred to me that it was important. Its not important to me now either. I do things how I want and how I think they are right. A lot of people on here put importance on normality and the alpha elite or whatever, and that is really your powerful weakness.

However I was in school detention, and it wasn't fun like the Breakfast club. They had strange partitions up between every desk so that you couldn't see your neighbor or anything but the wall in front of you. They brought food to you and you had to eat it at the desk facing the wall. I did a few good drawings in there though.

 

I was home schooled for all of high school except my senior year, so I can relate to not feeling like you got to be a teenager.

That last year that I did go back I got a taste of it, but by that point my SA was pretty bad so I couldn't really enjoy it.

I'm not sure if this is offensive to say, but it sounds like you could be experiencing a bit of a mid-life crisis, not that I'm any kind of expert on such a thing. But that feeling of lost youth and seeking out the activities you missed out on sounds like what I've heard it's like... I apologize if that's rude :|

Never went to a single high school party.

You didn't miss much, trust me. I was dragged to a few house parties, and they were nothing but a bunch of teenagers acting like they were drunker than they were. The only one I stayed at longer than 30 minutes was a New Years party.

 

I feel more like I missed out on my 20s. I didn't have much of a life as a teenager, either, but eh, I don't think I care enough to want to do those years over.

I did go to a couple proms, but knowing that I went to them doesn't make me feel like any more of a person. They didn't furnish me with any precious memories.

 

I sometimes dwell on that I missed out on teenage love, like everyone else I knew had their first relationship/sexual experiences with girls at 14 - 19. I did have a couple of chances but my SA was more intense then, well everything felt more intense! I had 2 friends in school from the year below that I saw, played computer games with and watched movies, so that was something I guess.
My 20s were made up of working in a low paid job I managed to get, no life besides that really, no sex or girlfriends still, just more wasted opportunities and avoidance. My 30s is even worse, more isolated and alone than ever. But things can change, if you have life you have hope. :um

 

No. I just wasn't a typical teenager. I didn't have any interest in socializing, sports or the prom or anything like that.

 

It doesn't really bother me anymore. It has been a long time since high school. What I regret more are my college years, not having done more then, like partying, dating (although I did go to a party or two, and date some guys). What I am regretting more than anything really is not doing more with my life now as it is, do the things I want to do.

Still, I'd like to have some of those crazy high school stories. My sister talks about hers all the time. All I have are memories of breakdowns. It sucks, but what can I do? Can't change the past...well, only the way I think about it and I don't think about it much these days.

 

I don't really think about it. It doesn't upset me. But just for the record, in high school, I had no friends, didn't go to the prom, got THE LEAST applause of all 300 graduating seniors that went up for the diploma. I wouldn't even be surprised if someone people were either wondering who the hell I was, or were surprised that I was still in the school when I went on stage. Didn't eat in the cafeteria the last two years of high school. Took as few classes as possible. Left the school as soon as the last class was over. Mostly hung out in the backroom of the cafeteria. I was far worse than any geek. I was invisible. I wish I had discovered alcohol in high school. I would have just sipped vodka throughout the day and at least been comfortable.

 

A little. I did not do the things teenage people do (well at least I did not go to parties, did not drink, date boys and all that).At times I tend to idealize such experiences because I never had it and then my younger sister is complaining about how boring teenage years actually are, I just want to say "nooooo , it must NOT be boring, like, look at yourself, you're a young and beautiful teenage girl, go out and have fun "
But then I think again... Mine teenage years weren't terrible either. If not for constant bullying at school ( verbal and physical) it was quite ok , as I just spent my time with smart adults , read books, went to my amazing art school and basically did interesting things.

 

Nope. I was actually went out all the time back then. Had friends in high school. Sadly, although I still know those friends we kind of grew in different directions. Shame.

 

I don't miss my teenage years at all. It was the worst time of of my life. Grade school was bull****. I do miss college sometimes though. I had a steady girlfriend throughout college. Got laid all the time. Now I'm single living in the big city. I have a close group of friends but I totally feel alone and have anxiety in social settings.

 

My teenage years seem like several lifetimes ago. But I didn't really miss out on much. I left school at 16 - I went to a private religious school (ridiculous) and I never had any trouble with bullying or things like that. I was a bit of an egg head - I studied a lot at night and was at the top of the class with another kid who was a friend of mine. No-one really had parties when I was at high school - but I did all that in my twenties. I got tired of school at 16 and told my father I was leaving - he was a bit annoyed for a while but when I told him I'd go to TAFE ( technical college) he calmed down. I left that after a year too and went to work at a large hospital that was near to where I grew up. I had a great time there for the next few years - met my first 2 girlfriends there. My anxiety didn't really kick in until later, although I found doing certain things at TAFE difficult, like doing a presentation etc.

 

I did not go to school age 12-17 and I don't really care. I made up for it (sort of) in my 20s and early 30s. I only wish I had started junior college at age 15 instead of 18. I could hack college but not high school.

 

Oh, absolutely! Having suffered from bullying and SA in high school I can say that that's me, too. I so wish I knew in high school what I know now. For example I didn't know what I had was SA, just thought it was shyness or something. I remember, in our year 12 yearbook we had our school picture next to a baby picture of ourselves, and there was a quote there next to your picture that was supplied by your friends, which was supposed to be a funny thing you said, or something that reflected who you were. No quote was given to the kids who were organising it for me and so when I got the book next to my name it said "had a farm"...because my last name was McDonnell and they used to sing that Old MacDonald song at me with me name in it (got this from kindergarten all the way through til year 12...you think they'd get over it). I gave my unsigned copy of the book to the school library. Anyway, I realise I sound a bit "poor me", I just wish I had friends, a signed book with a quote like everyone else, and better memories.

 

I didn't go to the junior prom or senior prom. Never went to a single high school party. I didn't have my first kiss or lose my virginity in high school.

At our school the dances were called 'Socials', never went to one. And at the end of high school in year 12 we have a 'Formal' which is another dinner / dance. I didn't go to that either. Ditto the first kiss and virginity thing too.

I wish I could do it again and sometimes fantasise about that.

 

There were a few fleeting moments during high school that I was able to capture a moment of feeling like I grabbed the feeling but overall I did not have the same experience as most around me did.

I wish I could erase John Hughes movies from my memory.

 

There were a few fleeting moments during high school that I was able to capture a moment of feeling like I grabbed the feeling but overall I did not have the same experience as most around me did.

me too. I was on the sidelines most of the time.

 

The beginning of the cliques

The first thing I noticed about high school was the girls(teenage girls) and I thought holy ****. Then reality sunk in I was the new kid in a big new high school. At this stage a lot of people already new where they fit in this intricate social web. I had no clue and being new with no friends, things only got worse for me from here on in. High school was very cliquey. A lot of kids were already experienced with networking and climbing the social ladders. I always fealt that i needed something extra like better clothes, a decent car, more money, or I would never fit in. I think I ends up keeping to myself because I couldn't compete, or would never fit in anyways.

 

Yes, missed out on a lot. Never really understood the social codes. This wasn't too bad during middle school and junior high as I enjoyed being alone, but grew to be a bigger problem during high school where I really felt totally different from the rest, and got bullied a lot. Looking back with what I know now, I should have reacted in some way...telling teachers, my parents more. But I really didn't have the big picture back then, and I naively thought it would pass, that people would grow more mature.