No.

Humans need other humans, you can't be alone.
It's just not what you've been designed for.
It's okay to want to spend some time alone but not 24/7.

Like you've said, only people with issues would stay alone.

 

Hate to disagree but ever heard of Richard Proenneke? Or the Desert Fathers? These people spent decades in total isolation, and were both happy and fulfilled.

Anyway I wasn't talking about being alone 24/7 or of leaving civilization. Someone who associated only with immediate family and an intimate circle of friends, while shunning publicity and social functions, would still be seen as a recluse by society.

 

I feel that anyone has the right to live however they want. We only get one shot at this anyway. I don't look down on party people even if I don't agree, nor do I look down on the opposite. It's all alright with me. So yes, being reclusive has its benefits and drawbacks just like everything else.

 

Reclusive people who is not suffering from serious mental illness are rather common in Japan. We call them hikikomori. I am one of them. Some of them taking online class and freelance jobs, so they're not all parasite singles/NEET. Unlike Western parents who tell their children to get a life and cure their social avoidance, our parents are ashamed to take us to psychiatrist, so they accept our choice to live in solitude... therefore recluse is a valid lifestyle here.

 

Reclusive people who is not suffering from serious mental illness are rather common in Japan. We call them hikikomori. I am one of them. Some of them taking online class and freelance jobs, so they're not all parasite singles/NEET.

I've read all about the hikikomori! Very interesting subject. I'd probably feel more at home in Japan, but it's too late to learn Japanese. :um

 

I agree. I just replied to another user's post about their realization that perhaps not EVERYONE needs to be happy in a relationship, perhaps some people can be happy on their own. Well, ditto here. I don't want to be TOTALLY isolated, but for the most part I'm content being mostly alone. I honestly don't want to have a huge busy social life--that's what would actually stress me out even more. I like things like reading and writing and watching wild animals eat the food I put out for them. I'm not the most sane or emotionally stable person there is, not by a long shot, but many sane and emotionally stable people prefer being on their own, and as long as it causes no one distress, what's wrong with it?

Something is a "disorder" only as long as it causes somebody or possibly the people around them distress.

Humans in general might be social creatures but some people just aren't cut out for it or meant for it. An ostrich is a bird but it certainly can't fly no matter how hard it tries. It does just well running around on the ground. Just because it can't fly doesn't make it any less of a bird or mean that it has a problem, it's just adapted to life differently from other birds.

 

Idk but I wish I lived in a society where everyone is socially anxious and not just me(or us)

 

How would it be financially viable? I see no problem with it, if that's what makes you truly happy.

 

There is nothing wrong with be a recluse as long as you aren't doing it simply because you are afraid and running away from something. I'm fairly sure most people who have SA become recluse out of fear and essentially for all the wrong reasons.

 

I think it is a valid life style if the person chooses because they prefer it, and it makes them truly happy. Heck I think it is much more valid than the life style of a lot of socialites that live to be seen by others.

 

I don't know, I've heard of people becoming hermits and living out on their own, but I really think everyone needs some social contact, even if you are happier being alone.

I am an introvert, my brain is wired in a way that I actually need a lot of alone time or I get really overloaded. When people think of introverts they probably think recluses, but true introverts have a real serious neurological need for alone time or else we short circut. I say if you can be social do so, but there is nothing wrong with wanting to have alone time either. I think being a total recluse isn't healthy psychologically though, it erodes your social skills if you are alone too much.

 

I usually prefer to be alone, and besides the internet, family, my best friend, work, and texting I'm living in isolation, but I enjoy it. It's stress free for me. I go everywhere by myself and every once in a while I'll go out with someone to a restaurant, movie or something of that nature, but for the most part I'm always by myself. I even go to the theaters by myself sometimes and I'm fine and content with that. I feel like I have nothing to prove socially and I enjoy hanging out with myself, so that is what I do.

 

I live much the same lifestyle, and agree. There's no way I'd want to be a total recluse, nor Mr Social Butterfly. By the OPs definition of recluse (which very much fits in with ours), I think it is valid.

 

Of course its acceptable because you can do whatever you want. If you don't feel comfortable in social situations it's not your fault. What you have to do is grow contempt for people who do feel comfortable. When you absolutely hate everyone you will no longer even care whether or not being reclusive is acceptable.

 

Being introverted doesn't necessarily mean you have mental problems, although it would be interesting to know what percentage of introverts do vs. what percentage of extroverts do, and whether/how much the types of problems they are prone to differ.

 

There is a world of difference between being introverted and being schizoid. Schizoids dislike human interaction but are rarely happy. Their discontent stems from not being able to connect with other human beings. They may well dress it up as a lifestyle choice but in reality they have little choice in the matter. They are broken and so long as they tell themselves that they chose this lifestyle because they really do not like people they will never have a chance at leading a happy healthy life. Take it from one who has experienced agoraphobia. Human interactions make life worth living. Don't lie to yourself about it. Get help. Get some good meds and do some CBT. It really is worth it in the end...

 

Well sure. If anyone out there really believes they would be happy living socially isolated lives that is their prerogative. It just doesn't make sense that such a person would be asking people on a forum dedicated to social anxiety what they think. This counts as a social interaction so it is kind of ironic. Just go and shut yourself away and stop asking if you really believe it. If you are unsure then that pretty much makes me right: you don't really want it but are considering it as an easy way out because social anxiety is just too painful for you...

 

Forget to take your meds this morning?



Hmmm. Who sounds angrier about their lot in life, you or me?

 

i honestly don't think it's healthy. humans are social beings. thats just the way we were made. even the most introverted and shy person on the planet is a social being who needs other people

when i was younger i had a social life. i had a group of friends and a local pub. i spent my weekends with other people and was always out and about and going on holidays and stuff. that period was very difficult for me because social situations were a nightmare. i'd always been using drink and drugs to get me throuhg them. and i was also the butt of all of the jokes. i got bullied and victimised by my mates cos i was the least social.

when i was 21 i completely lost touch with my friends cos slowly we had been drifting more and more apart as the years went by, as you do when you start getting a bit older. so at 21 i was a complete hermit/recluse for a good 2 years and i loved it. i just loved the comfort of being alone watching movies etc... cos i could relax in my own company. after 2 years living that way just became a habit that i couldnt seem to break and as the years went by i found myself over the age of 25 and still in the reclusive habit. by that time any fullfilment that the reclusive lifestyle used to give them had completely ran out. this life was so miserable, boring and meaningless now

i found myself looking back to those years when i had a life. and even though it was painfull being with other people and being out and about at least i had some kind of life and some relationships. at least i was living life to a certain extent. i really, really missed those times.

living as a reclusive is disrespectful. it disrespectful to the fact that you have been given a life. you are wasting a gift you have been given. it's disrespectful not to exercise when you have 4 limbs. people in wheelchairs can't exercise, they dont have the choice. you have the choice to live your life. to instead choose to be a recluse is disrepectful to more unfortunate people that don't have the choice that you have

 

living as a reclusive is disrespectful. it disrespectful to the fact that you have been given a life. you are wasting a gift you have been given ... you have the choice to live your life. to instead choose to be a recluse is disrepectful to more unfortunate people that don't have the choice that you have

Is George Clooney disrespectful for not getting married? After all, there are tons of lonely people out there who would love to marry someone half as nice as each of his girlfriends. But instead he stays single, living the way he wants, the way that makes him happy.

The Buddha was born a prince with great power and wealth. Was he disrespectful for renouncing all that and living like a poor person?

We are talking about becoming what you were meant to be, choosing the lifestyle that fits you best and then owning it. You're making a value judgment saying that a life lived in seclusion is a life wasted. Some of history's greatest artists, writers, naturalists, and even saints were hermits. A recluse is not the same as a shut-in, nor does it mean doing nothing important with your time.

Obviously someone like Obama does his best work out in public and that's where he belongs. That doesn't mean Enya is doing wrong by locking herself in her castle to compose great music.

 

valid? its been my life for almost 23 years

 

yes if u are borned extremly rich
lol obama is destroying usa if u consider that best work

 

Of course being a recluse is a valid lifestyle choice. If you want to live a peaceful and quiet life, then being a recluse is the best way to live.

 

The problem is being a recluse isn't merely a matter of feeling lonely, it also means being stigmatized by society and having difficulty doing things necessary to survival like finding and maintaining a job, since many jobs require references or connections to obtain. And you can't go to a lot of places alone either, or everyone will look at you like you have two heads. People who are recluses are usually either really rich and can afford not to care what people think, or they're still being supported financially by others.