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SUPER EFFECTIVE!
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
It seems like everybody posts these, so I thought I'd jump on the bandwagon.

(long story, feel free to skip)
I was in Target a few weeks ago. While I was looking at sweaters, I think, these two women around my age walk into the store (the door is visible from where I was). I thought they were both pretty, but I thought one was particularly cute. Anyway, I just continue what I'm doing. Next thing I know, they are across from me, looking at shoes (shoes are across from mens clothes). While one is all into the shoes, the one that I liked keeps glancing back and smiling at me. I get nervous and try to walk past her, and as I walk past she just keeps smiling at me as I go by. Now I'm sweating bullets. After some distance I look back and I see her and she is looking back at me again. I got so nervous that I left my basket of stuff and just walked out the store. In the car I was mad at myself, thinking I should have talked to her, but I have no idea what to say.
(end of story)

Now I know the first step would be to not run away. After that, what would one say if you are approaching somebody in a place like a store?
 

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*Sigh*
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i think alot of the males have some problem at first with comunicating with the other sex
although this is my opinion in said situation your better off just going for it regardless you'll either get it right or get it wrong + its a good chance to push your self past the comfort barrier you have around your self and women tend to find shy men somewhat endeering so sometimes it can help you although thats dependant on if shes into that. :D also if you find the person atractive then you really do have nothing to loose. :)
 

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SUPER EFFECTIVE!
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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
You make alot of sense. Hmm, maybe I just need to learn how to start a conversation. I never really know how to break the ice.
 

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I'd imagine it's very nerve-wracking! For next time, maybe just throw yourself out of your comfort zone and go up and talk to her. Maybe ask her name, introduce yourself, ask how she is, etc. It'll be scary but it's practice.

If it makes you feel any better, I do the same thing in those situations. I was at a shoe store with my mom, and there was a cute guy who worked there walking around the floor. My mom told me that he kept looking at me (I'm very unaware of this type of stuff). After she pointed it out I noticed that he was indeed looking at me. A little while after that I saw that he was following me and trying to get my attention, and so I acted like I was completely unaware and started wandering around in any old direction. Once we were ready to leave I noticed he was at the registers, and rather than face that awkwardness, I just looked at purses for 10 minutes until he went back on the floor. Then I bought my stuff and hightailed it out of there.
At another store this salesclerk flirted outrageously with me, and while I was flattered, I avoided it for a little while out of embareassment. I buckled, since I love that store, and he didn't really flirt but he did make it a point to say hello to me. I said hello back, but after that I kept my eyes down and let my mom do the talking. I still feel bad at how stand-offish I was.
 

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I have no idea what to say. "I see you are shopping, I am shopping as well...lets go out."
Make it relevant to what she's doing. If she's looking at books or something, be like, "Oh, have you read that one? It looks good" and go from there.
 

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I am trying to start conversations with someone new everyday. Even a short sentence or two. It is really hard but I am slowly getting used to it. On some days I still avoid people even though I really want get over it.:?
 

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You could've gone up, said hi, and asked if they would give their opinion on a sweater you were looking to buy. Maybe complement them on what they were wearing, tell them they seem to know what they're doing, then ask if they would mind commenting on the sweater.

If they go along with it, great! you now have a topic for conversation (clothing, fit, colours etc.). If they say they're busy or flat out reject you, no problem. You were simply asking for practical advice and can play it off as nothing serious.
 

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SUPER EFFECTIVE!
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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Thanks for all your suggestions everyone! They're really helpful!! :D

I'd imagine it's very nerve-wracking! For next time, maybe just throw yourself out of your comfort zone and go up and talk to her. Maybe ask her name, introduce yourself, ask how she is, etc. It'll be scary but it's practice.

If it makes you feel any better, I do the same thing in those situations. I was at a shoe store with my mom, and there was a cute guy who worked there walking around the floor. My mom told me that he kept looking at me (I'm very unaware of this type of stuff). After she pointed it out I noticed that he was indeed looking at me. A little while after that I saw that he was following me and trying to get my attention, and so I acted like I was completely unaware and started wandering around in any old direction. Once we were ready to leave I noticed he was at the registers, and rather than face that awkwardness, I just looked at purses for 10 minutes until he went back on the floor. Then I bought my stuff and hightailed it out of there.
At another store this salesclerk flirted outrageously with me, and while I was flattered, I avoided it for a little while out of embareassment. I buckled, since I love that store, and he didn't really flirt but he did make it a point to say hello to me. I said hello back, but after that I kept my eyes down and let my mom do the talking. I still feel bad at how stand-offish I was.
Thanks for the advice! Yeah, this sounds like almost the same situation with me. I'm usually unaware too, I just noticed this time because she already caught my attention. I kinda felt bad too. If it had been the other way around, I would have felt like I must be the most horrible thing in the world if this person has to run away :roll

You could've gone up, said hi, and asked if they would give their opinion on a sweater you were looking to buy. Maybe complement them on what they were wearing, tell them they seem to know what they're doing, then ask if they would mind commenting on the sweater.

If they go along with it, great! you now have a topic for conversation (clothing, fit, colours etc.). If they say they're busy or flat out reject you, no problem. You were simply asking for practical advice and can play it off as nothing serious.
Hey that's actually really good! Thanks!
 
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