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Little Winged One
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm beginning to think it is,and I'm just incredibly naive! I live in a nice neighborhood(not great),but nice.- About 6 months ago my neighbor had a heart attack.- Always thought he was a super nice guy.- Looks a little like Tom Selleck-very quite and a intense,deep thinker type.- Always took him homemade sweets around the holidays. - When he returned from the hospital-he seemed so weak and frail.-I felt terrible for him - brought him food,offered to help him clean if need be.- About a month ago he had a stroke.-Sent him a couple of cards,a small get well gift. Today another neighbor tells me he's a drug addict-the toxicology report showed his stroke was the result of him being so high at the time.-Apparently everybody in the neighborhood knew this all along! I saw sort of odd people there often late at night.- I'm so dumb - I just thought he was probably the cool guy they could talk to about their problems.- No,turns out they're druggies !! I feel so shocked by this- just wanted to hear other opinions. How could I have been so naive?? Turns out the heart attack was also from drugs-and no one bothers to let me know this???
 

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So because he got addicted to drugs and ruined himself he deserves no love or attention from anyone? I know you feel embarrassed but it's the people that define whether or not the world is horrible. Your kindness towards your neighbor made this world a little better of a place regardless of whatever type of person your neighbor was.
 

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Little Winged One
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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
mombow-I understand what your saying - but I have kids. Don't know details about his specific drug usage.- But,I really don't want us blown into a million pieces from some meth. lab accident.- Or robbed by some of the druggie friends.
 

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Why does kids have to do with anyone looking down upon someone? Drug addicts can compromise of anyone from beggars to CEOs. What does doing drugs have to do with their sense of morality? They're bad people everywhere regardless if they do drugs or not. He's still the same person, he just likes to indulge in pleasure. Is there something wrong with that?
 

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Just for the record, I really hate the term "druggies"... :no

But I understand your hesitations, esp with kids.

Are you even sure this information is valid? I mean, how does the neighbor whom you got this information from even know this? The lab results arent available to just anyone.

Make sure its even true before anything else.
 

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I hate the term "druggie" too. I don't look down on people who use drugs. They're just trying temporarily escape their boring, stressful lives. They are not all horrible people. Would you feel the same about him if he was addicted to pain killers or anti-depressants?
 

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I hate the term "druggie" too. I don't look down on people who use drugs. They're just trying temporarily escape their boring, stressful lives. They are not all horrible people. Would you feel the same about him if he was addicted to pain killers or anti-depressants?
I have never really thought about this in these terms. Great point.
 

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People talk a lot and they might exaggerate. They say he's a drug user when he could only be a quiet pot smoker, or a coke user. It doesn't mean he suddenly with hold you at gunpoint and take your money. And if he was a hard drug user(meth or crack), he probably wouldn't have a job or a house.
 

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being naive isn't necessarily a bad thing, you just have to be careful who you let into your life. it sounds like you were nice to him and maybe when he gets off drugs he'll remember and return the favor if you need it.
 

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Little Winged One
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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
The information is accurate- His ex-girlfriend of 5 years let me know.-She's been taking care of his dog and visiting him while he was in the hospital.- He's temporarily living with his parents until he gets stronger. Apparently he "shoots up"-since I don't know much about drugs,not sure what drugs that implies. Of course,I know that's much worse than marijuana. I'm somewhat frightened of anyone that would be brought down to that level. That's a part of society I'm not familiar with. I will have to give this a lot of thought.
 

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I wouldn't think any less of someone if I found out he/she was a drug addict. We all have problems and I can understand how one would go to such measures to escape reality.
 

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The information is accurate- His ex-girlfriend of 5 years let me know
How well do you know this person? Why would she just tell you that? I still cannot help but think there is more to this than meets the eye.

She's been taking care of his dog and visiting him while he was in the hospital.- He's temporarily living with his parents until he gets stronger.
And this is his 'ex-girlfriend'...you really think this is news to her? How do you know she doesnt have some kind of axe to grind. If this is true, how do you know that she isnt doing it to? People tend to bond over pharmaceuticals. How do you know that she is being honest? And if she is taking care of him why would she be telling everyone in the neighborhood this?? Dont be so quick to judge, something just doesnt seem right here.

Apparently he "shoots up"-since I don't know much about drugs,not sure what drugs that implies. Of course,I know that's much worse than marijuana.
Shoots up what? Heroin? Speed? I just cannot figure out why his so called friend, albeit ex, would relay that information to you? Just seems like a piece is missing here.

I'm somewhat frightened of anyone that would be brought down to that level. That's a part of society I'm not familiar with. I will have to give this a lot of thought.
You are more familiar with it than you think. Drug users are all around you and some of them use it as casually as some people use Xanax or any other prescription drug. Not all "druggies" are losers that are going to pull out a gun and rob and kill you. Some are actually people.

If you dont want to continue any association with this person that is your prerogative and your right. I dont blame you for that. But I wouldnt just take this person's word for anything; unless you are a close friend of hers I fail to see why she is going around the neighborhood telling people this?
 

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I noticed in the post that you want 'opinions'. So you tried to help him and stopped because you found the root of his physical problems was addiction? Well, yes the world really can be a horrible place and many people are scarred and hurting. Some of them are on the streets, in mental institutions, and in prison. Some of them are your next-door neighbours and I guess for someone like you it might be shocking, but it's reality. It's also difficult for people who overcome addictions to deal with the stigma and shame that's perpetuated by closed-minded, judgemental people. It's a sad fact that many people never look beyond the surface and see the individual.
 

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Pervy Ranger #8
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...it's likely his doctors told him. They don't just keep it from you to spare your feelings; they want to save your life :p. But it could be just rumours. How do these people know about his toxicology report?
 

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The Govt., its laws & the effects of those laws is what scare me.
(makes the world a more horrible place) Not people who use a substance.
 

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I don't have sympathy for people who are willing to kill and rob people for money for drugs. My cousins lives have been ruined because their mother wanted to drink and get high all day. They never thought they were worth anything. My uncle tried to kill my family and I because that's how screwed up the drugs made him. He repeatedly beat and raped his now ex-wife and made her life a living hell. His son is homeless because he does drugs too and his daughter is 20 with a 4-year-old who doesn't listen to anyone and is becoming violent. I've lost every single friend of mine I've ever had to drugs. They don't want to spend time with me anymore because my idea of fun doesn't involve ecstasy. They don't care about school or their families anymore, just the drugs. Another relative of mine had his throat slashed over drugs. He was almost decapitated and was stabbed 96 times.

Because of my experiences, I look down on druggies and I choose not to associate myself with them. Some of them do have mental illnesses and are looking for an escape but instead of blowing their paychecks on coke, why not go to a doctor and get drugs that are designed for treating their specific mental illness? It's all excuses. I realize that not everyone who does drugs is a terrible person, but a lot of them are. I don't think anyone knows the real impact they have on people unless you go through it first hand. Maybe I'm being hypocritical and I'm not saying I'm a better person than druggies, but I have no respect or sympathy for them.
 

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I don't have sympathy for people who are willing to kill and rob people for money for drugs....
I dont either. And I dont think anyone said that they did? But not everyone who uses or has used drugs are killer and robbers.

Because of my experiences, I look down on druggies and I choose not to associate myself with them.
You shouldnt associate yourself with anyone you arent comfortable with and I dont think anyone could fault you for that.

I dont know...what is a "druggie"?? You will have to clarify that term for me?

Some of them do have mental illnesses and are looking for an escape but instead of blowing their paychecks on coke, why not go to a doctor and get drugs that are designed for treating their specific mental illness?
Oh you mean how like people with SA use alcohol, they should go to the doctor and get the "right drugs"??

Not everyone who uses drugs has a mental illness. You are making a vast and sweeping generalization here. You dont seem to have a clear understanding about the subject matter because not all drug users can be filed neatly under one label.

It's all excuses. I realize that not everyone who does drugs is a terrible person, but a lot of them are.
I am confused because you post that after saying "Because of my experiences, I look down on druggies ".... whatever a "druggie" is anyway.

I don't think anyone knows the real impact they have on people unless you go through it first hand.
Yep, that is how I have come to my conclusions.

Maybe I'm being hypocritical and I'm not saying I'm a better person than druggies, but I have no respect or sympathy for them.
"I have no respect or sympathy for THEM". Define "druggies", and who this group is that you have no respect or sympathy for?

Again I am confused because you say this: "I'm not saying I'm a better person than druggies" but also say this: "Because of my experiences, I look down on druggies."

Again who is "them"? I am not some apologist for someone who is out robbing or killing people but I dont think you seem to realize how many people are/have been involved with drugs, some to more of a degree than others. You are speaking about a rather large group of people, way more than most people realize and they arent all dark, evil, deviant people.

And despite what people believe people also quit and walk away from it and lead normal, regular lives.

You are certainly entitled to your beliefs but to file every so called "druggie" (again, whatever that is :con) under one label and dismiss them is something I just dont see one can logically do. :stu
 

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I dont either. And I dont think anyone said that they did? But not everyone who uses or has used drugs are killer and robbers.
No one said they did, I was just stating that I don't feel for drug users. Judging by the other replies, some people don't seem to have a problem with drug use and it seemed as if people somewhat identified with drug users who want to escape reality.

I dont know...what is a "druggie"?? You will have to clarify that term for me?
In my opinion, a "druggie" is someone who uses illegal drugs.

Oh you mean how like people with SA use alcohol, they should go to the doctor and get the "right drugs"??

Not everyone who uses drugs has a mental illness. You are making a vast and sweeping generalization here. You dont seem to have a clear understanding about the subject matter because not all drug users can be filed neatly under one label.
Yes. People with SA should not use alcohol to cope with their problems. Using alcohol and illegal drugs will probably not work as well as using proper medications prescribed by a doctor.

I realize that not everyone who uses drugs have a mental illness, which is why I wrote "Some of them do have mental illnesses..."

"I have no respect or sympathy for THEM". Define "druggies", and who this group is that you have no respect or sympathy for?

Again I am confused because you say this: "I'm not saying I'm a better person than druggies" but also say this: "Because of my experiences, I look down on druggies."
I have no respect or sympathy for people who do illegal drugs and let the drugs take over their lives.

I don't want people to think that I'm on a high horse and that I have never done anything bad or wrong. I'm not saying I'm a better person simply because I don't do drugs. When I say I "look down" on druggies, I mean that I think negatively of them. It's something that I don't think I would ever accept about a person.

I am not some apologist for someone who is out robbing or killing people but I dont think you seem to realize how many people are/have been involved with drugs, some to more of a degree than others. You are speaking about a rather large group of people, way more than most people realize and they arent all dark, evil, deviant people.
I understand completely how common drug use is. I don't care if you do coke once a week or if you shoot up 5 times a day, I don't see anything acceptable with the usage of illegal drugs. I don't believe that all drug users are "dark, evil, deviant people" because again of my experiences. I know a lot of them and they aren't all bad people.

You are certainly entitled to your beliefs but to file every so called "druggie" (again, whatever that is :con) under one label and dismiss them is something I just dont see one can logically do. :stu
I don't believe that everyone who uses illegal drugs is a low-life loser who commits crimes or has a mental illness. I don't think I ever made that generalization either. I never said ALL druggies are like this or ALL druggies are like that. The only thing I said that generalized a group of people is that I look down on all druggies. And you're right that I'm not doing it logically. But to me, you don't have to be a bad person for me not to like or respect you.

It enrages me when people (and I'm not saying any of you here) dismiss drug use as no big deal and some type of recreational activity. I'm not sure if they understand how much it an affect others. There have been so many things that my family and myself have been robbed of. There are the little things like having a birthday party or calling relatives up on the phone just to say hi (without arguing) that some of my family will never have.

I would never put my family and friends in a position where they would be worried about getting assaulted or murdered by wronged drug dealers or cops coming over to the house all the time and I don't think I could befriend anyone that would. I cannot think highly of anyone who uses illegal drugs because they are putting themselves at risk for losing control of their lives and hurting their families. I may be close-minded and my opinions and thoughts may be wrong but I still stand by them.
 

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I don't believe that everyone who uses illegal drugs is a low-life loser who commits crimes or has a mental illness. I don't think I ever made that generalization either. I never said ALL druggies are like this or ALL druggies are like that. The only thing I said that generalized a group of people is that I look down on all druggies. And you're right that I'm not doing it logically. But to me, you don't have to be a bad person for me not to like or respect you.

It enrages me when people (and I'm not saying any of you here) dismiss drug use as no big deal and some type of recreational activity. I'm not sure if they understand how much it an affect others. There have been so many things that my family and myself have been robbed of. There are the little things like having a birthday party or calling relatives up on the phone just to say hi (without arguing) that some of my family will never have.

I would never put my family and friends in a position where they would be worried about getting assaulted or murdered by wronged drug dealers or cops coming over to the house all the time and I don't think I could befriend anyone that would. I cannot think highly of anyone who uses illegal drugs because they are putting themselves at risk for losing control of their lives and hurting their families. I may be close-minded and my opinions and thoughts may be wrong but I still stand by them.
You can't seem to separate the actions of "robbing someone" and "doing drugs." Sure, you can blame all his problems on drugs and refuse to blame his actions. There plenty of people that mess up without drugs. They're plenty of people that rob and steal for reasons unrelated to drugs at all. Unless this robbery directly was caused from a drug deal gone wrong what's to say that drugs caused it? What if it was your cousin that ripped him off (stealing) to have the guy so angry to slash his throat 96 times? In that case, he asked for such a thing to happen. I'm sure drugs were a contributing factor to his downfall, but be realistic about it, it's not as heavy as a factor as you make it out to be. As someone who has been deep in that world and gotten out, it's all about personal responsibility. Many people keep their sense of morality and don't prioritize their drug use over their family or their own personal ambitions.

Anything in excess can be a problem. For instance, lives are ruined by playing videos games 24/7. Or for a woman with an obsession for shoes and spends load of money to fill her closet. There are many habits out there that have similar detrimental effects. The only difference is drugs turned out to be a valuable commodity that is completely unregulated and people are persecuted for it by society. That's a recipe for disaster and you felt the effects of it first hand.

I don't blame you for hating drugs, I would too if something so tragic happened. But you are not absolved from the personal consequences of looking down upon someone.
 
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