Omfg, Iv'e just accidently heard my Dad talking on the phone to my Auntie, about my whole life, how I'm not normal, how I don't really have many friends, how I have practically no social life, how I never go out, how worried he is about me and how that everyone hopes I will grow out of it. Then he mentions how my brother is so outgoing. THEN he was like it's great to get this off my chest -
yeh not so fing great for me though is it Dad?
(I think he thought I was out) I was seriously considering just cutting the phone of, but couldn't get the guts.)
Iv'e had it happen before, its all so secretive and scary, I can't stand it. Luckily, I was able to just shrug it of. BUT after this time, it's just too much, really playing with my head.
I am completly disgusted that he was making me sound like such a loser. I would NEVER EVER consider making somebody look as bad as he made me sound. It makes me feel so rubbish, my confidence is completly shattered, my whole week is ruined. Words cannot desribe how deflated I am feeling right now.
To make it 100x worse, we are going down to stay with her tomorrow, there is absolutely no way I can go now. She must think I'm a complete weirdo with absolutely no life.
If I'm honest, I'm actaully quite happy the way I am, Yes I don't have many close friends, but I'm not bothered, Iv'e had them but they just come and go. I find it easy to talk to new people, probably easier than people I already know, so its not really a "problem" for me. I really don't worry about anything because I'm so laid back, but having other people "worry" about me is playing with my mind. It makes you sooooooo paranoid .
How an earth am I ever supposed to be happy if they keep on doing this. A
bsolutely no way I can ever talk to my Dad now.
ITS ALWAYS ME, no other person in my family is ever analysed like this, there all so fing normal, it completly kills my state of mind and breaks me.
!I WAS COMPLETLY HAPPY BEFORE THIS!
