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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Im new here. Things not going so well right now. My wife just informed me she is unhappy and unsure about her"life's path". We are talking but tonight she is staying at a friends house to be by herself. She says my shyness, timidness and social anxiety turns her off. And she doesnt know what she wants right now. IM going to get help because it is a problem for me, not just her. She is talking and willing to go to counceling with me but Im not sure if she will stay in the end. SHe's very out going and is now, after 10 years together, "tired of my anxieties".
Ive struggled all my life and when I finally met her she accepted me but now, after should hasnt been able to "heal me"(her words) she is rethinking it all. Along wiht her confusion about her "life's path". Ive gone to see my doctor and IM back on PRozac and am making an appt to see a therapist. She says she would go if I ask her but I fear she may just confirm for herself that she wants to leave. I dont know that I can be "outgoing" enough for her or what exaclty she wants be to be. We have a house, no kids. I love her.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thanks for the welcome. Im not happy with who and how I am in certain situations. (social) What I dont know if she gets is that I cant something Im not.
I dont need or want to be the life of the party but I do want to be comfortable in my own skin, be able to talk confidently with people, etc. I just dont know if its too late to save my marriage. I wish she had told me earlier that it bothered her but she never did express that to me until now. I dont know if its all about me, her career, both or what. confused but working on myself as hard as it is.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
im tying to help her to understand by talking about it. IM not sure she would come on this site though. Thank you for your post, your boyfriend is a very lucky man.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
The way you described it this sounds like it is as much about her and her current "life path" at the moment than it is about you and your anxiety issues. /life crisis I hope she isn't using your anxiety as a crutch.

Welcome to SAS fixme. :)
thanks, i fear you hit the nail on the head. I just dont know for sure. Kind of a coincidence she suddenly brings this up now at the same time when she never told me before my social anxieties upset her so. She says she wants a partner with goals, etc. How about buying a house and paying 90% of the mortgage and helping her with her business so she can flourish and trying to have a happy life together. THose arent goals? What does she want, me to reinvent the wheel?
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
She said whe would spaek wiht MY therapist but not sure about teh willingness for marriage counseling yet. IM tying to talk about that with her. I agree that IM glad she finally said someting to me. At least I know where I stand now
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
We have written a cople letters to each other expressing feelings. It is easier than speaking them sometimes. I may do it again this week to try to explain the anxiety and my willingness to work on it.
 
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