Social Anxiety Support Forum banner
1 - 20 of 63 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
371 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I was reading in my psychology class about personality and why and how people develop their personalities.. Well it made me wonder what exactly causes SA because when I was younger it wasn't so bad.. I always blame my SA on my parents because I feel like they screwed up my childhood and they were never really there for me but I really don't know why I am the way I am.. What do you guys think causes SA? School, home, your parents, your peers,.. Or does it just happen.. Is it destiny??
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,338 Posts
As soon as me and my twin walked into kindergarten, thats when I remember it all begining, I can remember my thoughts " just pretend you're not scared and act bored " being a twin required not having to learn how to make friends even though we eventually got a crew throughout kindergarten till halfway grade 1 when we were transported to a new class and everything fell apart right there! That's when we stopped talking to anyone else, I blame being twins
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
296 Posts
As soon as me and my twin walked into kindergarten, thats when I remember it all begining, I can remember my thoughts " just pretend you're not scared and act bored " being a twin required not having to learn how to make friends even though we eventually got a crew throughout kindergarten till halfway grade 1 when we were transported to a new class and everything fell apart right there! That's when we stopped talking to anyone else, I blame being twins
Hahaha I'm a twin too and I can see where you're coming from. Having a buddy right there to fall back upon is such a relief. At the same time, it's so limiting. Yeah, I'm pretty close with my sister, but with that, I didn't make as many new friendships or take as many risks as I could have.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
128 Posts
Honestly, I think I was born with SA, and it wasn't developed through experience. I can't remember not being the way I am today.

My earliest social interactions were back in preschool and kindergarden, and I can still remember even back then I was the shy odd ball in the class. Back then kids were starting to form cliques and friends, learning how to form relationships with others... I was always the one that was left out and just had the one or two kids in the class i could i really "bond" with.

Maybe it started off as just a simple personality trait of shyness and as I got older, entered the 1st-2nd grade, started getting picked on by classmates, that's when it turned into something more.

Who knows?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
311 Posts
I think it's because of my peers and the constant negative interactions I had. In elementary, I was deemed a loser early on and even by people who were new to the school and had no idea about my reputation. In the 6th grade, that name followed me even though there were plenty of new faces. That's what being myself earned me, so imagine how I felt when they made fun of me for it.

Then, there was an incident where I told a teacher about them bullying another girl, and she questioned me about it later while another student was in the room. He yelled, "It was YOU!" and announced to the entire class outside that I was the one who told on them. Getting picked on became bullying at that point, and that's about when I developed social anxiety.

I now wonder why I never told anyone about being bullied. What would it have hurt? How much LESS could they have liked me at that point? I feel like I REALLY ****ed up on that one, and if only I had told someone I could at least have salvaged something of myself before the problem became what it was. Thankfully, seven years later, I think I'm finally getting the upper hand on this thing.
 

·
(.*?)
Joined
·
6,756 Posts
I was really shy for no clear reason, genetics maybe. But childhood shyness is common, even if I was more extreme than normal. Turning it into SA may have been a choice to avoid suffering the difficulties of changing myself. By 6th grade or so, I just gave up and refused to talk to people. Now, it's kind of too late to change myself.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,196 Posts
I really believe that I was born with it, too. It was passed on to me. Getting the hell beat out of you for no reason(physical and verbal abuse), being picked on in the neighborhood, at school, etc. I was, and still am shy. Being dumped on so much made me pull back from people and led me to lead a sheltered life, for the most part.
I, just like anyone else just wanted to be a person who grew up in a loving home, had friends, etc., but it just wasn't meant to be. What really pisses me off is other people made me this way. If they had just left me the hell alone and let me live my life, none of this $%#$# would have started. But nnnnnoooooo that would have been too easy, too convenient. I was destined to have a lousy life no matter what I have ever done to change it. I avoid people as much as possible. I don't trust them because they have never given me a reason to do so.
 

·
Fall 7 times, stand up 8.
Joined
·
8,916 Posts
I was already shy. Negative thoughts and worrying about what others thought about me in middle school started it I think.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,181 Posts
born with it, I remember being took to kindergarten by my parents and I soon as they got me to the class I started crying wanting to go back home. I think my family held on to tight to me or something. When my parents divorced and I had to move in with my grandparents that's when I probably got real bad, they never really raised me, made me do anything, basically just bought me everything I asked for without question and let me do my own thing, kind of like how someone would treat the family pet.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
924 Posts
Where do I start?


Almost all of my family members suffer from some type of disorder, so it was bound for me to be somehow screwed up. This is the list:

Father's side:
-Grandfather: Depression and alcoholism.
-Mother: Depression, alcoholism, and biolarity (I think).
And my dad has a wonderful mix of all of these, plus he's a drug addict.

Mother's side:
-Grandfather: Depression and bipolar.
And my mother suffered from SA and depression when she was young.

Psychologists have told my mother that my sister suffers from Bipolar disorder, but she's never been diagnosed.

I think that I was also 'meant' to have social anxiety because many children that suffer from OCD go on to have SA.

So yeah, "destiny."
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,125 Posts
I have no idea. I used to be a really social, outgoing kid until I was about 13 or so, and then I slowly started to change (Although somehow, I didn't realize that something might be wrong until long after that)

And I can't think of any one traumatic event that would have caused it either.

:stu
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
298 Posts
Overprotective parents, and many missed critical 'outting' oppurtunities at an early age. Also, very conservative family values.
 

·
one stop away
Joined
·
1,454 Posts
I think I was predisposed to it because of all the depression/anxiety related disorders on both my parents' sides. But I also think the main reason for it was my years at elementary school and especially at middle school. I went to the same school for all 12 years (all the way up through high school) and so I grew up with the same group--and that group had labeled me an "untouchable" since kindergarten. And then I also had to deal with sporadic verbal and emotional abuse at home. There's no specific event that I can remember which triggered my SA. Pretty sure it was a series of smaller traumatic events which were all piled on top of one another that really did it.
 

·
Monster
Joined
·
6,552 Posts
The demons in my head told me so.
 

·
Beneath the surface
Joined
·
164 Posts
Traumatic experiences during critical years 10-13. I went from a social outgoing kid who was talented in sports to a recluse with no life in a year.
 

·
LookingForMyLife
Joined
·
598 Posts
For me it is a combination of not being raised right(enviromental), and a chemical imbalance(biological).
 
1 - 20 of 63 Posts
Top