Social Anxiety Support Forum banner
1 - 11 of 11 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,151 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I get a litlle peeved off when women say, they feel fantastic as they get older, They know more, they are more experienced in their sex lives, they are more confident and in control in their lives.. phooey. They feel better now then when they were in their 20's. As the saying went "more comfortable in their skins. Bah!! Hogwash.
I'm more of a nutjob now than I ever was. Lots of emotional trash was buried, in my 20's. Now that I've taken a look in, I'm shaking.

jenky
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
311 Posts
I hear ya! We may be more comfortable in our skins - but the fact that the house is becoming desperate for a makeover, and has outdating plumbing and wiring means its way less desirable than a newer model. :sas
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
994 Posts
Hmm, I'm over forty...I do feel better (emotionally) then when I was in my 20s....
I get...."Anxious" when I read (OK, I skim the personal ads, looking for my friends ad, I'm....) a man, say 40, wants a younger women, uhm, excuse me, kinda a double standard.... It's getting harder to apply for jobs, cause, most everyone that works there is in their 20s makes me feel like I should have, done more........Other than those things, being over weight, I have never been better in my life....Oh, that doesn't say much;-).........But really......I think, we can grow out of much!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,742 Posts
jenkydora said:
I'm more of a nutjob now than I ever was. Lots of emotional trash was buried, in my 20's. Now that I've taken a look in, I'm shaking.
jenky
Join the club jenkydora, you are not alone. I'm certain this affects many from both sexes. If one doesn't deal with the underlying problems that plagued them during their youth, then those problems only magnify themselves with time.

So you younguns, heed this advice: work on your problems NOW, otherwise pay bigtime in your later years.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,567 Posts
I think some of that "I feel better now that I'm (insert age)" type of comment is whistling in the scary place where people are sleeping really soundly. I appreciate people's efforts to be positive, but some of it rings a little false, especially if the spokeswomen is fabulously wealthy and well established. But on the other hand, I do feel better about somethings. I think I've worn out the part of me that expects me to change. Like lots of parts, the "intense need to change" part just doesn't work so well anymore. That is a relief. I would hope women experience some of that relief too.

I do think men find more models for graceful aging than women do. Not sure how to address that, although with two daughters, I expect some of the women on this board to figure out these gender issues so my kids will have an easier way to go. But no pressure ;)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
35 Posts
I feel both better in some ways, and worse in some ways. When I was in my teens and twenties, of course I looked great, and I thought I could do just about anything. However, I was buried in a bunch of crap I didn't know about, and was following patterns I didn't know where there.

Today, I know much more. However, now that I'm aware of the junk, I feel trapped by it, and I want more desperately to get out of it, but it's still hard, and my SA is probably my biggest remaining issue. I had SA when I was younger, but didn't know what it was, I thought I was just super shy. Now I know what it is, and I struggle with it every day I'm out of the house, and many days that I am in the house.

So, I'm glad I know more now than I did, and yet, knowing more also means I know more limitations... so, good and bad, I think. :)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,211 Posts
jenkydora said:
I get a litlle peeved off when women say, they feel fantastic as they get older
Although I can understand that many women feel more comfortable emotionally as they get older (just wish I could say the same! :lol I agree with you, jenky, about feeling worse than before!), it's when they say that they look better that I'm a bit suspicious. You know these women's magazines, where a well made-up, airbrushed, and stick-thin 50-something claims she looks better and is so much fitter and more attractive than she was at 20? Hmmm. :?

Perhaps some of those who claim to feel fantastic (but don't really) are simply trying to appear younger and are thus playing along with society's obsession with eternal youthfulness? :stu
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
175 Posts
I find myself agreeing with all of you... it really is a bunch of hogwash! There are some people that do age better than others, but to say you're better now than you were then isn't the complete truth. You may have learned a lot during your lifetime, you may have kept your body in shape (but seriously - how many have a better body now than they did in their youth?), you may be more experienced sexually... but take the make-up off the face and the underwire bra away and what have you got? :duck Someone who can't compete in any way, shape or form (except intellectually, experience wise and, perhaps, financially) with someone 20, 30, or 40 years their junior.

Maybe they are more comfortable with themselves... but I'm much more uncomfortable with me now than I was then. It doesn't do much good to be more experienced, intelligent or anything else if you've isolated yourself to the point that there's no one to appreciate it and enjoy being around you. And sometimes there are really a lot of physical problems now that you didn't have then as well. Things change and wear out as you get older. That's just the way we're made. I'd love to have the body, skin, hair, etc. I had when I was 20... or even 30 for that matter. I'd love to have the stamina and agility be able to jump down from a tree like I could then or chase the kids around the yard and play soccer with them.

And I think Free Thinker's advice/warning was very appropriate:
So you younguns, heed this advice: work on your problems NOW, otherwise pay bigtime in your later years.
 
1 - 11 of 11 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top