Social Anxiety Support Forum banner
1 - 20 of 42 Posts

·
LookingForMyLife
Joined
·
598 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Although I have a hard time being around strangers, I get alot worse when I am around the same people everyday. I think it is because I feel inferior to them, also the more I am around the same people the more my problems come out, and I know they think I am wierd or awkward or quiet. This is really bad for relationships and jobs!
 

·
Renewed Hope
Joined
·
354 Posts
I have a hard time being around the same people, I feel like I need to talk more and that I need to impress people. I don't have much anxiety around strangers, I even had random conversations with strangers and I was okay.
 

·
LookingForMyLife
Joined
·
598 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I have a hard time being around the same people, I feel like I need to talk more and that I need to impress people. I don't have much anxiety around strangers, I even had random conversations with strangers and I was okay.
Yea, that is kind of like me man. I feel like I have to talk and if I dont than I know people think I am wierd or stuckup. Than it just snowballs into me not saying anything at all most of the time. Thats why for me it is easier to talk to strangers. Keep your head up!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
163 Posts
Yea, that is kind of like me man. I feel like I have to talk and if I dont than I know people think I am wierd or stuckup. Than it just snowballs into me not saying anything at all most of the time. Thats why for me it is easier to talk to strangers. Keep your head up!
Yea I'm pretty similar too.

But it all depends I guess......many times I am uncomfortable as all hell talking to strangers(depending on who it is), and it's not just girls that I am attracted to that make me uncomfortable(but that contributes as well).

I have noticed being around the same people over time starts to weigh on me.....I feel like the more I am around them the more they realize I am a bit weird and anxious for the most part......like I haev to somehow contribute to normal conversations more often or tell more stories or some irrational complex.....rather than just be comfortable knowing you are just sharing space and conversation.......bah!
 

·
LookingForMyLife
Joined
·
598 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Yea I'm pretty similar too.

But it all depends I guess......many times I am uncomfortable as all hell talking to strangers(depending on who it is), and it's not just girls that I am attracted to that make me uncomfortable(but that contributes as well).

I have noticed being around the same people over time starts to weigh on me.....I feel like the more I am around them the more they realize I am a bit weird and anxious for the most part......like I haev to somehow contribute to normal conversations more often or tell more stories or some irrational complex.....rather than just be comfortable knowing you are just sharing space and conversation.......bah!
hey man whats up, It is not really easy for me to talk to strangers either, it is just easier than people I see every day. It aint easy trying to be someone you are not( my problem). Hot girls intimidate me alot, but I am attracted to them so I try anyways(setting myself up for failure I guess). I have had success with them in the past but my problems always ruin things. They eventually realize I am wierd or whatever. Later
 

·
anhedonic
Joined
·
2,005 Posts
It's easier being around strangers because I'll never see them again, so their opinion of me doesn't matter.
 

·
SAS Member
Joined
·
31,286 Posts
I guess I'm the opposite. When I'm around the same people I tend to be more relaxed and more of myself.
 

·
R.I.P. Do not contact.
Joined
·
1,905 Posts
I'm a mess around everyone, but around strangers I'm extremely concerned about my first impression even if I'm unlikely to see them again. Around people I see daily, I know what attitude to expect from them and how I should act. I give up trying to impress or befriend them after a few days or weeks.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
251 Posts
I really hate being around the same people every day. Sure I am comfortable around them, but that almost scares me more than being around new people that I don't "know" to the extent that I don't even want to be around them. I think it could be just the general person I am usually around, seeing as I live in a very small town with very small minded people. I want to get out of here so bad, but I feel as though I am trapped and there is really no way for me to make progress if I don't let myself act the way I want to be.

I usually get extremely nervous around new people though, because I do not want to offend anyone, and I know that my views on most issues are NOT what most people that live around me would consider "normal" haha. I am really starting to not care about what others think, because it seems they don't much care about my views either. Anyway, I am getting way off track now lol... To sum it up, I think being around ANYONE to much is never a good thing.
 

·
In my shiny bubble
Joined
·
2,428 Posts
I thought it would be worse being with strangers, but I think it's worse being with people you see everyday.
Strangers kinda don't know you, like how quiet you are etc unlike the people you see everyday.
 

·
Protector of the Den
Joined
·
15,048 Posts
being around strangers is the worst for me, especially if it is in a setting where I'm expected to interact(parties, classroom, etc). People I know only bother me if I don't get along with them or they make me uncomfortable.
 

·
MayTheForceBeWithYou
Joined
·
19,559 Posts
i think i have it worst when im around new people. the reason is that i do not know the person at all, but at the same time i don't want to be judgemental on them.

i like to meet new people but i still get anxious and afraid. I also get shy and quiet sometimes because im not sure what to say or do.

lets take going to school and classes for example. I get anxious and nerves when i actually put my cloths on and get out of the house, but just thinking that my classes are free is a bonus for me to go. my mind is set on learning what the teacher is teaching. i am not invovled with making friends, but it sure is a plus to make some type of relationship with someone in class. lets say you missed a class, and you wanted to know what the teacher covered. of course you can email /or call the teacher and ask, but you might what to consider to call a student in the same class. this has worked for me, just to have communication with another student just to break the ice. who knows, maybe that person will become your friend / your best friend / or if its the opposite sex maybe your girl /or boyfriend.

lets take meetup groups or hanging out with my star wars friends at events. i seem like we have something in common and i try to use what we have in common to build that friendship, and than maybe i will feel relaxed and more comfortable with him / her.

but going back to the question of this topic, i think i have it worst with new people mostly.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
40 Posts
To be with strangers is easier for me, for the same reasons people above posted.
People that I see everyday know more about me and therefor Im more thoughtful what they think about me, how I come off and so on.
Also I try to seek more for their approval and acceptance than I would with strangers.
 

·
slanted and disenchanted
Joined
·
321 Posts
strangers are stressful b/c i'm always trying to 'read' them and i get anxious about how i might be coming across.

however, people i see everyday can be equally anxiety provoking. even if i am able to pull off a decent first impression, i am always waiting for 'the other shoe to drop', so to speak (i.e. if they haven't figured it out already, it's only a matter of time until they see the 'real me' for the mess that i am!)

so, i don't know, both are challenges to me for different reasons.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
94 Posts
I have a hard time being around the same people, I feel like I need to talk more and that I need to impress people. I don't have much anxiety around strangers, I even had random conversations with strangers and I was okay.
Just like me sometimes I find it hard to be around with the same people. At least with a strangers you get a chance to break away from the norm conversation, and can casually talk to them.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
230 Posts
Yes. It seems that with people you know there's that expectation that you need to be more social and outgoing because you now know them. That just builds up more pressure to come up with interesting things to talk about.
 

·
LookingForMyLife
Joined
·
598 Posts
Discussion Starter · #18 ·
I thought it would be worse being with strangers, but I think it's worse being with people you see everyday.
Strangers kinda don't know you, like how quiet you are etc unlike the people you see everyday.
Yea, around strangers you dont have to analyze yourself consantly ,(your thoughts, what people are thinking about you, how they will react to what you say or dont say, feeling as if you have to fit in, worrring if they think you are wierd or awkward, and have that constant feeling of anxiety.) I wish you the best
 

·
LookingForMyLife
Joined
·
598 Posts
Discussion Starter · #19 ·
being around strangers is the worst for me, especially if it is in a setting where I'm expected to interact(parties, classroom, etc). People I know only bother me if I don't get along with them or they make me uncomfortable.
Yea, I am bothered by strangers if I am expected to act a certain way, like at social events. But its not as bad for instance talking to employees at stores and such because I have an agenda about what I am going to say or ask. However, if I start to see those employees too much than it becomes harder because I feel like they start to realize how I am and I feel like I have to act a certain way.
 

·
Fitting In Here & There
Joined
·
808 Posts
the same people every day

With the same people, I feel more pressure to live up to their expectations of me. not that I know what they are, but I assume they are impossibly high like my father's were, and then I freak out. (Panic attack, flee, act aloof, etc)

Strangers are much easier because there is no future relationship to have to worry about.

One time I told a past therapist: "If I was thrown into a job tomorrow, like in retail where you have to talk to the public, it's not the customers I'd have the anxiety around, it'd be with the co-workers and boss!"
 
1 - 20 of 42 Posts
Top