It's the attempt to micromanage the interaction and avoid mistakes that makes it draining. Trying to focus on being aware of everything and careful and planning ahead and all takes a lot of energy. On occasions where I'm comfortable letting it flow naturally, it actually invigorates me.
We're having to do about 10 times as much as people without SP. Non-sufferers can just relax and enjoy the interaction - for us, the content of the interaction is way down the list of things to be conscious of - just reaching the end is the goal, not enjoying the journey.
Talking to people makes me feel drained, because they are not responsive at all when it comes to communication. The people brain awareness is delayed, their response time of speaking and reacting is always out of sync. What's the sense of having a conversation with someone who don't show any signs of brain awareness correctly.
Answer is very simple for me. I don't like talking to (most) people and never have. Stands to reason. I don't really feel drained after doing it. I just feel glad it's over and preemptively start dreading the next time.
I only like to have a few close people in my life. End up picking up their energy too. If someone is angry in the room, I end up feeling it and becoming emotionally drained simply by being near that one person. So I like my social group to be very small.
it's talked talking way more than they do(mostly in my head) for me
person: what you doing?
me: (do i say i'm fine?? do i say that i'm not doing anything?? why does "what you doing" tend to be answered like it's "how are you?"??? and do i say "what about you' or just "you?"???) fine...you?
People are not paired up or with the people that THEY need, to have these free flowing convos.
Cause I could be with 500 people and feel drained. But then, find 3 that, for "Some Reason", I just so enjoy their
company that talking is effortless.
We just "haven't found that yet". In my case, I LOST IT. Due to my own stupidity.
Our constant obsession in how others think of us, because we want everyone to like us to the fullest. Anything less than the fullest, it might be a chance they will hurt us eventually. To get everyone to like us to the fullest, we have to be our perfect most socially ideal selves (even superficial selves) with zero flaws. And doing that of course will be very draining.