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What do you do with your hands?

2438 Views 8 Replies 9 Participants Last post by  epril
So long story short, I have learned that I have less anxiety while talking with someone face to face if I'm doing something with my hands. Just yesterday, I was having a conversation with my manager and I had a piece of paper in my hand that I was playing with. I surprised myself at how much I talked especially the quality of what I had to say. And guess what? No anxiety! When I'm at work, I always notice that I put my hands in my pocket when I'm talking to someone because it seems to help the anxiety. Is there anyone else here who constantly has to be doing something with their hands when they're talking to someone face to face? And if so, what exactly do you do with your hands? The piece of paper thing worked for me yesterday but I can't carry a piece of paper in my hands with me at all times. I have an elastic band on my wrist all the time that I play with when I have nothing else to hold onto but I feel awkward reaching for it whenever I'm talking to someone. Any tips?
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I used to be the most talkative when I am drawing, sketching, its seems sorta rude but I can talk fine, and respond and listen better when i do it. the key is have your focus away from the normal thoughts: what are they thinking, why are they looking at me that way, do i look alright, am i talking alright, etc. keep yourself distracted from all that and you will do better,

I do that often but then start thinking well what if I seem rude not looking them in the eye which conjures up more anxiety...sometimes it seems to be rude because in America it is rude for you not to look into peoples eyes when talking.

To me I think thats sorta true maybe for job interview, but if you a friend or it just a casual discussion with a stranger then looking away distracting your mind elsewhere while talking isn't that rude.
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