[Reecedouglas1]

That I'm shy and quiet.

 

[WillYouStopDave]

I don't know but probably half of them are correct. I don't think all that many people spend enough time thinking about me to make assumptions about me. I'm kind of an invisible person who is not anywhere where people are going to be observing me unless I need to be. So, essentially, people are going to be shopping when they're near me so they're thinking about food most likely.

 

[harrison]

Back when I was living at my wife's place they most likely thought I was like them - reasonably well-off, probably in some sort of profession. I think you just get used to living in an environment like that. Plus I grew up in a nice area too and I'm fairly well-spoken/educated etc.

I don't live there now - I live in public housing. A friend of mine said people probably think I'm a lawyer coming to visit one of the other inmates. (oops - residents) :roll

 

[Blue Dino]

That I am oddly and suspiciously standoffish and mysterious. Where I am a rather unopened person compare to the normal typical person.

 

[EmotionlessThug]

The title brings up a good question. My aunt believes that I'm disinterested in working with people and she believes that I look gay. My aunt repeatedly said to me that when I turn 30 years old that no job, women or anyone going to ever want me. My mother believes that I'm lazy and she said no matter what I say, she won't change her belief about me.

My mother believes that I repeat myself and that I need to get electroshock in my brain. I had a professor think that I'm shy and quiet, but the people in my class are not interested in socializing with me. The people in this community in the past think that I repeat myself on each thread that I post in, and that my posts about my ideas and experiences are irrelevant to the topic of the thread. A complete stranger who's a member of this community believed that I'm spreading my belief, but he influenced people about his belief about me on specific threads that I post in.

One of my classmates approach me out of place, just to say that I need to see a therapist. My cousin said that I need to see a psychologist for defending myself, because her 10 year old son woke me up from my bed, tried to punch my testicles, and cause confusion in the basement.

 

[truant]

Um, well, that's hard to say. I can't read people's minds and most people won't come right out and tell you, but based on various things I see in the media about people like me, or people with my problems, and in comments on videos, forum posts, etc.:

* that I'm lazy
* that I'm irresponsible and selfish
* that I'm delusional
* that I'm confused
* that I'm in denial
* that I'm ignorant
* that I'm narcissistic
* that I'm misogynistic
* that I'm a pervert
* that I'm a danger to women
* that I'm a child predator
* that I'm a weapon of the patriarchy
* that I'm destroying civilization

And, possibly most annoying of all,

* that I don't want to get better and I could fix myself if I really wanted to :roll

I think most people probably see me as some kind of combination of these things. Though, depending on their political affiliations and ability to empathize, they might feel sorry for me, too.

 

[Persephone The Dread]

Kind of a weird mishmash of things both online and irl.

some people have thought I was autistic, quiet, weird, creepy (well that's more like an emotional reaction some people have to me but yeah,) going to destroy/kill people, innocent, naïve, intelligent, younger than I am, someone who doesn't swear at all and would be bothered by others swearing (LOL,) a sexual predator, a misogynist, a misandrist, a pedophile-supporter, a feminist, someone with internalised misogyny, a female supremacist, a traitor, a right-wing plant, a transphobe, a terf, an sjw.

More flamboyant, plenty of piercings/jewelry to match your sometimes brazen approach. Don't laugh, but it was along the lines of a pirate. While I'm aware of the myth of Persephone, I mentally tacked "the dread" onto "the dread pirate Roberts."

But a quieter looking slightly built woman can still have the mind of a buccaneer. It fits.

I'd prob get an industrial piercing if the healing process wasn't long/high rate of infection from what I remember, and if I didn't have to go in person to get it (I have my lobes pierced but that happened when I was 7.) I don't go to the hairdressers either. Don't think I want to try doing that piercing myself. I mean I kind of do want to because 'that's metal™' but nah there's no way that will go well.

Oh yeah I almost forgot someone once introduced themselves to me by saying I seemed like the most normal person there hahahaha no.

So everything in a way.

 

[Starcut83]

That I keep to myself sometimes so I must be shy.

But honestly I don't know.

I've been told I always appear calm...which I am often calm but not always, even if I appear so.

 

[zonebox]

Outside of this forum, I don't think I am social enough to have many assumptions made about me. On this forum, I don't know what kind of assumptions are made, I don't really want to know - but I am not very offended if people are making them.



When I was more social on the web, there were all sorts of assumptions made, depending on the topic. It is really weird how people behave, and half of the time I would think people were more so having a conversation with themselves, and I was more of an inactive participant while they fought a monster of their own creation :lol At some point, I just started to think it was sad but kind of funny at the same time. I've had a multitude of identities giving to me, sometimes I would be thought to be a conservative, other times a liberal, sometimes a Christian, other times a blood drinking Satanist. The list goes on and on, but eventually I just stopped caring.



I think the web had a large impact on my own views of my identity, and I started to come to a conclusion that an identity is not something I get to choose, it is something other people give me. If anything, having created one myself was only a chore to try to maintain, and it was not useful beyond socializing with people. I seem to have trekked off the beaten path here, but I do believe it slightly ties in with the topic.

 

[ladysmurf]

I think that I'm shy, ignorant, and rude.....Many times when people talk I might isolate or not engage easily (or at all) in the conversation because I'm so anxious, but I think people who don't know of my problems automatically see me as an ignorant and rude person. I am not really good at small talk, and it takes me a really long time to open up to people so I can feel comfortable enough to speak to them, but it's not easy . I have noticed that after a few tries people give up on you and will consider you rude or something if you don't open up easily to them (which for me is a big struggle) and that hurts. It's a part of my illness, that I am trying to work on and I can't explain it to people. I feel so uncomfortable around people that my mind goes blank and sometimes I can't think or speak and it might results in panic attack.

 

[rabidfoxes]

I've got no idea. My family probably think that I'm "wasting my potential" but whose family don't think that? With strangers I often get the feeling that they don't quite know what to make of me and don't care to get to know me, but that's just on anxious days when I feel out of place everywhere. On good days I feel like everyone thinks I'm the dog's bollocks. In reality most people probably don't think about me much at all.

 

[Sainnot]

That I’m nice. I’m actually a terrible person.

 

[ladysmurf]

I've got no idea. My family probably think that I'm "wasting my potential" but whose family don't think that? With strangers I often get the feeling that they don't quite know what to make of me and don't care to get to know me, but that's just on anxious days when I feel out of place everywhere. On good days I feel like everyone thinks I'm the dog's bollocks. In reality most people probably don't think about me much at all.

yeah that is the worst feeling. I've had a relative call me weak, and tell me that I need to grow up because life is too short, and that psychology is a bunch of lies to get people hooked on medications. :frown2:
the person also told me that I've pretty much wasted my life, i should be working a great job by now, having a family, because i was very good at school, and it's a priority for a woman to have a marriage and kids. but instead of all that i wasted my life in my fears and psychiatrists, etc..Needless to say I don't talk to the person anymore, and I haven't for quite a few years now, but it still hurt that people see us that way.

 

[truant]

My family probably think that I'm "wasting my potential" but whose family don't think that?

Forgot this one. I think people who know me are sometimes surprised I'm doing so poorly because I had "so much potential."

I know my dad thinks this way about me. He doesn't come out and say it, but he's constantly relating anecdotes about overcoming your fears and achieving your potential, haha. The disappointment is palpable even if he's too nice to call me a loser. My dad has been very successful, so I think the contrast is galling.

 

[Mlt18]

They often think I’m a pushover and will try to con me into stuff, then act all shocked when it backfires big time. Also that I’m “soft” probably because I don’t talk much and my voice isn’t loud.

 

[dinosaurparty]

People often think that I want to be left alone, although that couldn't be further from the truth. I guess I'm sending out signals that make them think that way. I wish people would treat me like everbody else. When I'm around other people nobody ever wants to hear my opinion on anything, nobody tells me about their daily experiences, I'm always treated like I'm not even there.

 

[rabidfoxes]

the person also told me that I've pretty much wasted my life, i should be working a great job by now, having a family, because i was very good at school, and it's a priority for a woman to have a marriage and kids

Oh yeah, I've been told all of those too. Bet they also believe that if they just beat you down in the right kind of way you will suddenly "snap out of it" and later thank them in your Nobel prize acceptance speech. Good on you for cutting this person off!

Forgot this one. I think people who know me are sometimes surprised I'm doing so poorly because I had "so much potential."

If you haven't seen it already, Promising Young Woman has great commentary on "potential". I had to stop myself from punching the air repeatedly while watching it (but could be triggering -- if you do want to see it, maybe check it out on IMDB first).

 

[Persephone The Dread]

I don't think anyone ever assumed I'd be successful or had any expectations of me at all. I'm not sure if they assumed I'd fail as badly as I have or not, hard to say. I used to wish my mum would have pushed me more or encouraged me more, but she didn't because her mum pushed her too hard. The grass is always greener I guess.

 

[truant]

If you haven't seen it already, Promising Young Woman has great commentary on "potential". I had to stop myself from punching the air repeatedly while watching it (but could be triggering -- if you do want to see it, maybe check it out on IMDB first).

I saw the trailer for that. I'm a bit leery because I don't handle torture scenes very well and I'm not sure how graphic it will be. But thanks for the suggestion. I'll probably try watching it anyway if it ever comes my way.

 

[Saeta]

Re: this topic. If you're not my friend, there is zero difference between seeming unfriendly and being unfriendly. I don't have to know how you treat your close friends before I make that statement. It's less of an assumption and more of an observation of your interactions with them, which is all that matters. If someone says you're unkind or impolite, the sooner you own that unfriendliness, the more in control you'll feel.