We've all met people like this. In classes, at work, at a social gathering, party, etc. It's that person who seems to make everyone around them want to talk and laugh. You know the one, you're out with some people, and there's this one person in the group who just brings out the festive mood in everyone around them. And they do it so effortlessly.
But have you every really wondered 'why' this is? Have you ever stopped to think....what are THEY doing so differently than everyone else? I like to ponder things like this in hopes that I can learn from some of these people.
I'm sure there's no magic bullet, but I'm always amazed at people like this. I've been around these types of people in college and work. And it's interesting how it doesn't seem to matter the situtation. I've gone into brand new environments with them, with a new group of people, where no-one knows each other, and given a short amount of time, they start to become the center of attention again.
So I ask YOU, my fellow SA'r, what do you think contributes to this phenomenon?
I'll jot down a few ideas myself to get started, these are just things I've witnessed:
-I would have said looks have something to do with it, but then I remembered back, and I've seen even so-so looking people be wildly successful at this, so I don't think looks play a very big role, if any.
-Giving off a positive vibe (Smiling, just being forward/friendly, being the first to saying something). Your smile is the first thing people notice, it makes a big difference in your approachablity. (Just ask yourself, would YOU approach yourself?).
-Talking at an audible level, laughing out loud at other jokes, people DO notice this.
-Not being so serious, keeping it light.
-Being a 'group' participant. I think people are more comfortable around those who they witness participating in group conversations. (vs. 1:1).
-Having stories, experiences to share. (I talked about this in another thread, I think this is a really important one, and you not only have to do it, you have to be good at it).
-Humor, the more the better. However it can be injected into conversations, the more the better. Humor breaks the ice, it instantly bonds people and puts them both into similar frames of mind.
-Being friendly and helpful. People respond positively to it.
-BS - I often wonder if BS is a bigger player in this than we realize. Some of the most socially successful people I've been around were masters of BS. They told everyone what they wanted to hear, and it worked for them. (I have problems with this one though, as I like to feel genuine when I'm trying to interact with others. And often times, you can see right through a BS'r. But hey, if it works, it works).
I know these are just the tip of the iceberg, and I know it's a combination of skills. But, I'd really like to know what you guys think? We all know people like this, what do you think makes them tick? Stop and think about it, and post your ideas please.
But have you every really wondered 'why' this is? Have you ever stopped to think....what are THEY doing so differently than everyone else? I like to ponder things like this in hopes that I can learn from some of these people.
I'm sure there's no magic bullet, but I'm always amazed at people like this. I've been around these types of people in college and work. And it's interesting how it doesn't seem to matter the situtation. I've gone into brand new environments with them, with a new group of people, where no-one knows each other, and given a short amount of time, they start to become the center of attention again.
So I ask YOU, my fellow SA'r, what do you think contributes to this phenomenon?
I'll jot down a few ideas myself to get started, these are just things I've witnessed:
-I would have said looks have something to do with it, but then I remembered back, and I've seen even so-so looking people be wildly successful at this, so I don't think looks play a very big role, if any.
-Giving off a positive vibe (Smiling, just being forward/friendly, being the first to saying something). Your smile is the first thing people notice, it makes a big difference in your approachablity. (Just ask yourself, would YOU approach yourself?).
-Talking at an audible level, laughing out loud at other jokes, people DO notice this.
-Not being so serious, keeping it light.
-Being a 'group' participant. I think people are more comfortable around those who they witness participating in group conversations. (vs. 1:1).
-Having stories, experiences to share. (I talked about this in another thread, I think this is a really important one, and you not only have to do it, you have to be good at it).
-Humor, the more the better. However it can be injected into conversations, the more the better. Humor breaks the ice, it instantly bonds people and puts them both into similar frames of mind.
-Being friendly and helpful. People respond positively to it.
-BS - I often wonder if BS is a bigger player in this than we realize. Some of the most socially successful people I've been around were masters of BS. They told everyone what they wanted to hear, and it worked for them. (I have problems with this one though, as I like to feel genuine when I'm trying to interact with others. And often times, you can see right through a BS'r. But hey, if it works, it works).
I know these are just the tip of the iceberg, and I know it's a combination of skills. But, I'd really like to know what you guys think? We all know people like this, what do you think makes them tick? Stop and think about it, and post your ideas please.