Social Anxiety Support Forum banner
1 - 12 of 12 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
173 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Today my wife, my son and me went to the beach.
That's the 3rd or 4th time this summer.
Now, I've always been afraid of the beach, for a combination of reasons related to each other and to social phobia: I'm too skinny, I don't exercise, I don't have a suntan, I don't swim very well, I'm afraid of going into the deep water, the sea water is usually too cold for me (even on hot days) and make me feel uncomfortable, I don't like stepping on stones, and I don't like how the sand gets everywhere.


And of course, my social phobia doesn't help. I'm always aware of everyone around and think they're looking at me. This made dealing with all the other things much harder.


But:
My wife loves the beach, and convinced me to give it a try, to get our son used to it.
We started with a somewhat secluded spot. There *were* people around, but not too much.
This allowed me to deal with each of the things I detailed above, without my social phobia getting the better of me.


Today we went to a spot with much more people, and it went better than I thought.


I was able to ignore the nagging fear of people looking at me, most of the time anyway, and managed to take my son into the shallow water (well, real shallow water...) and play with him while my wife stayed on the beach.


For me that was a real change, something I couldn't believe doing a couple of years ago.

 

·
Registered
Joined
·
193 Posts
Thats awesome! Keep it up! I will be heading to the west coast later this month and am planning on heading to the beach, so thanks for sharing and for the inspiration.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
154,233 Posts
You better watch out - at the rate you are going, you could be out there every weekend like me! :lol

I actually had a panic test when I went to the beach (really, i shouldn't have looking back) and it rained as soon as I got there! For 45 minutes, I sat and talked to people as we waited for the rain to stop. Once it did, I swam in the WAR water for about 20 minutes, and then left.
 

·
Freedom is lurking
Joined
·
809 Posts
Well done! I know how hard it might have felt. I too am too skinny and have a huge scar on my back, and for the past 10 years I never removed my shirt at the beach or went into the water, until... this month, almost every day! Feels great to be able to swim again, and I don't think people stare too much! :teeth
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
173 Posts
Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Thank you for responding :)
Since then we've been there twice more.

I've also found that being with my son makes me feel less anxious. Perhaps because I feel he takes the attention from me, but that's not a very positive thought, uh.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
3,567 Posts
That's great, Orwen2000. Haven't seen you around much in forever. Hope you're well, and didn't you become a dad recently? Congrats on that too.
 

·
alien monk
Joined
·
8,703 Posts
Well done :)

I find the beach is the most relaxing place. Love the sound of the waves and the sun in the summer. I can't swim either, I panic when water gets up to my neck. But anything shallower is really nice.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
173 Posts
Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Thanks Atticus, I wasn't aware anyone here was paying any attention to me...
And yeah, I'm a new dad, sort of. He's now about one year and 3 months old, very cute and very smart :)

That's not the reason I haven't been writing here a lot in the last 4-5 years though. Before that I've been using this site to write about SA-related stuff about which I couldn't talk to anyone else. But then I met my wife who has SA as well, so I can talk to her about this stuff amd the things I'm going through and she understands (she talks to me too of course...).
 
1 - 12 of 12 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top