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So at work today we had this meeting. There were about 25 people, and there was this motivational speaker talking about safety issues and whatnot. He was joking around, sort of picking on people in the audience. I was already nervous because I ended up on the front row, so most everyone was behind me. Made a couple comments directed at me, but they were funny and so obviously not true that it didn't bother me at all.

So then he brings out this sort of pepper spray stuff that causes severe respiratory problems for 2-3 days. Explains that girls can use this as birth control. He then asks if anyone has ever been sprayed by this stuff before. Everyone says no, but he looks at me. He then makes some comment about I'm sure you have son, I bet those girls are all the time spraying you telling you to get away at the club. And I was sort of okay with that.

But then some 30 year old chick in the meeting went like awww. That's what sort of signaled the anxiety cavalry. For the next 15 minutes I couldn't even hold my head up. I didn't cry or anything, but you could definitely tell that I wasn't in the same good mood I was in.

Even though I don't go to clubs and am too afraid to talk to 99.9% of the girls out there, this still definitely hurt. Just furthering the possibility of being sort of rejected by a girl is definitely going to set back me a couple of months.
And to think, I was actually getting better...
 

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Ugh,this really stinks:mum that speaker was really being a jerk. It's really hard to have that kind of attention when you have SA, whether it's good attention or bad attention. I think you held up alot longer than I would have, so good for you! Another thing to try to think about is that most people are sitting at a meeting just thinking about themselves, really, what THEY need to get done back at their desk, what THEY're going to eat for dinner later, what everyone else is thinking about THEM. So keep hanging in there.
 
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