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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Although I have posted in the forums before, by my own standards I posted quite a lot when I first signed up, compared to other forums I visit, recently I have found that I have been to scared to post in the forums, even in topics I can totally relate to, and situations where I think "Wow! I thought I was the only person who thought that."

I think part of the reason is because I often use the forums to vent and I am simply looking for people to respond with positive thoughts or things that re-enforce my feelings, to make myself feel better. This makes me feel very selfish because I'd hate for people to think of me as someone who just moans all the time and doesn't give anything back. Another reason is that most of the problems I would probably talk about, (Since I make YouTube Videos to vent my feelings on other things), revolve around girls and crushes and all that kind of thing, and talking about that all the time will get old pretty quick for other people I guess.

I also have a tendancy to write lengthy posts which probably puts people off, but I just find it annoying that, even though there are loads of people on here who can help, and most people don't waste their time just writing negative responses and that sort of thing, I still can't bring myself to post things. Even though I know it would help me, even if it was just from the point of view of writing out my thoughts on something that's been bothering me and being able to read them back to myself and clear them up a bit in my mind.

I guess it's a bit redundent to ask if anyone else has similar problems, in finding it hard to talk about themselves and post in the forums, since those people will not respond as they will be to afraid to...
 

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Being new to the forum I can safely say that I'm really not too afraid to post, or at least wouldn't be. However, it is difficult to talk about something I've never totally opened up to anyone about. But knowing there are so many people here who are going through similar problems makes it a lot easier to vent and share our own experiences. Basically, remember that you're not wasting anybodys time. Even if nobody responds, it still may help somebody else down the road knowing that they are not alone. Don't hold yourself back, you have a lot to offer. As does everyone else who posts or reads just reads these messages.
 

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I'm not sure if I'm really afraid to post most of the time, I just think, "Man, I am so boring. Who cares about what I have to say?" Though, I have been afraid to post if it's controversial and I don't have a good handle on what I'm talking about. I've also been afraid to post to help someone, because I don't want to give a stupid, unhelpful response.
 

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afraid isnt the best word for me, but i do wish i could post more but cant/dont. i always end up not being able to put my thoughts to words or thinking what i want to post isnt important enough. especially lately for some reason.
 

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I tend to start a thread and never look at the responses because I get 'scared'. I feel like I can never explain things as good as some people.
Lately, I feel like Im not feeling the love here, Im starting to feel lonely on this forum, but maybe my expectations of people are wrong. Im still here though? lol.
 

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I tend to start a thread and never look at the responses because I get 'scared'. I feel like I can never explain things as good as some people.
Lately, I feel like Im not feeling the love here, Im starting to feel lonely on this forum, but maybe my expectations of people are wrong. Im still here though? lol.
I'm here too!

I heart you!!
 

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I've got really put off from posting here now. I have been considering getting my account banned (the mods cannot fully delete accounts).

I just cant stand seeing all these dodgy sexual "debates". I am on the forums to escape from all that talk. Just hearing about what everyone else is up to is annoying.

I thought the forums were for talking about s/a and normal "its hard to go outside, or to be around people".

Theres no problem with talking about interests like sports etc. But its just soul destroying seeing dodgy stuff all the time.
 

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Spread Your Wings
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Me too. I've stopped posting for some time and started again, then stop for a long time and now, i'm posting at least one topic. And yes, I have the tendency to write really long posts. I don't actually reply much because if I do, i have to put up the best front I could ever had or if I actually laid back, I could get some sort of minor backlash.

Also, some people here seem to act like those loud-mouths in real life, brushing people off like so matter-of-factly and endorsing in their own world.

I've always thought that since this forum is catered for SA people. And there are some people that have the same traits as me. Admittingly, I am still shocked at how 'preppy' this site can sometimes be. I've been told indirectly I was 'immature' when I was sharing my own problems on this site. And I've actually been bullied by this one user into divulging my age so that they could analyse why I was 'immature'.

Anyways, this incident gave me a slight scare because I've always thought that since this is a SA forum for people that are socially inept; there's no reason why I was being called out for something so obvious or perhaps that they are expecting problems written in a way that are peppered with what the society had always expect from everyone and can't give them and now, they are doing this to us.

Sometimes, I felt that this board's abit hypocritical.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I just think, "Man, I am so boring. Who cares about what I have to say?" Though, I have been afraid to post if it's controversial and I don't have a good handle on what I'm talking about. I've also been afraid to post to help someone, because I don't want to give a stupid, unhelpful response.
I tend to think that I am boring too. This often stops me from sending E-Mails and messaging friends and things like that because I just think "They're not going to care what I have to say anyway." It also stops me from bringing up subjects if I'm talking to people on MSN or something because I just think, "They will think this is boring."

I also get what you're saying about not wanting to give out unhelpful advice, sometimes I will start a response to a post and stop myself because I think, "This wont help them," even if it's a situation similar to something I have experienced myself.

But thanks everyone for posting a reply, I appreciate them all, so, even if you thought it was boring or stupid or some other negative thought that your SA made you think, it wasn't, because I appreciated it.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
I post, but so far, can't start a thread.

I don't care about my posts, cos I figure no one really cares to read them.

But I can't handle starting a thread and no one replying.
I know what you mean about starting a thread. I hate that time between putting a thread up and just waiting for the first response, the first reply is always such a weight off the shoulders. That's why I'm really appreciative of anyone who responds.

I tend to try and fit my experiences and stories, as it were, into other people's threads that are similar to what I'm trying to write about, then of course, I worry about hijacking someone else's thread. But I don't really like starting threads.
 

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I do feel guilty as tend to visit this forum when I am more depressed and tend to post a thread looking for support. On the other hand it is such a big forum that you don't always get a reply, or it can take a while so on balance I'm not taking too much of anybody's time. If you go back a few days later you will probably find your thread on page 2 anyway! I have had some lovely PMs or replies. I feel as long as I only do occasional threads it's probably OK. Also if I search I probably will find a thread on the same topic and not have to start one!
There's the odd insensitive comment, but again if you balance it out against the number of posts there aren't that many and you're bound to dislike some posts from the sheer number posted from such a wide range of locations and backgrounds. Also, there might be more as people will be unhappy more on this forum than others and lash out without really meaning it.
 

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I think it gets easier the more you do it. I would say to start replying to threads that are neutral answers and then slowly start posting things that are more personal.
 

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I've got really put off from posting here now. I have been considering getting my account banned (the mods cannot fully delete accounts).

I just cant stand seeing all these dodgy sexual "debates". I am on the forums to escape from all that talk. Just hearing about what everyone else is up to is annoying.

I thought the forums were for talking about s/a and normal "its hard to go outside, or to be around people".

Theres no problem with talking about interests like sports etc. But its just soul destroying seeing dodgy stuff all the time.
You remind me of that character from 'The Catcher In The Rye'. Whats his name...? Yes, Holden... Holden something... Can't remember right now, read that novel a long time ago.

Hmm... just an observation:um.
 

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It took me a long while from actually finding the forum to actually joining and posting somewhat regularly. I think (it could have been somewhere else) I joined here maybe three or four years ago and posted like twice. The only response I got was... well, not nice. Figured that enough time had passed that new members would be here and hopefully be nicer.

I was really scared the first time I started a thread. It's the only one I've started. And I'm nervous about giving out certain information, even stuff that's possibly SA-related. I don't really expect replies to my post or PMs, because I've never got them before. I'm more afraid that because I'm a "solve it" person more than a "give sympathy" person, my posts will come out the wrong way.
 

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I'm not sure if I'm really afraid to post most of the time, I just think, "Man, I am so boring. Who cares about what I have to say?" Though, I have been afraid to post if it's controversial and I don't have a good handle on what I'm talking about. I've also been afraid to post to help someone, because I don't want to give a stupid, unhelpful response.
That how I feel except I am afraid to post for many of the same reasons. I've lurked here on and off last year before I joined. have to force myself to post. Worry about giving away too much personal info. Worry post is too long and boring or don't know what I'm talking about. Whenever I do post I always want to delete it.
 

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I'm scared to post too, it always seems like I can never say anything that is particularly thoughtful or articulate, or helpful. I also have a really bad habit of looking back at old posts and regretting what I said.
 

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Posting on forums has never been an issue for me

Posting on facebook is another story though :?, i know some of u guys are great at posting on facebook and i think "cool good on you" because i usually feel so embarrassed after posting something that i delete it a few minutes later.
More people to reply to posts on forums than on facebook :(

I do have one question though

How come some people post heaps and heaps and heaps and then out of the blue they just stop posting altogether??????
they were not nervous about it cuz i am talking about forums in general that i frequent so i do not get it. they still come on and say the odd hello but then they vanish again after posting soooooo much, i am confused on that one :stu
 
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