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I decided to figure out how to be truly happy I have to find the immediate cause of all of our emotions. To discover the root of unhappiness, I think the most accurate approach is to work backwards.

I've concluded that our perceptions are the immediate factor that determines our emotions.

If we perceive things as good we are happy, if we perceive things as bad we are unhappy. It's as simple as that, except that we are not in control of our perceptions.

It is important to know that nothing can be good or bad; things can only be perceived as good or bad.

If you think your life is bad, then imagine how you would feel about it if you just got back from prison. You'd probably feel completely different about your life, yet it is the same in both scenarios. This is just an example of how perceptions are what control our emotions.

But what determines our perceptions? Perceptions, judgments, opinions: we don't choose any of them; they just happen. We don't choose what we want or what we like, but even with that being true, it's still all in our heads.

Naturally, we are made to understand certain things. We want food, water, comfort, and we have a natural understanding of what is aesthetically pleasing.

These understandings are neither right or wrong. Our emotions cannot be right or wrong. They are what they are.

The search for happiness is somewhat of a paradox. To be truly happy one must understand that all of our perceptions and judgments are formed in our minds, and that we, that our true selves, are not our minds. We are simply along for the ride.

But if that's true, we cannot want happiness. It is our mind that wants happiness, yet to be happy we must understand that what our mind wants is irrelevant.

We are observers in our bodies. Life is an opportunity to see, to do, and to feel. Negative emotions are part of that. How can it be better to feel nothing? Why would we be alive it was better to feel nothing? The chance to experience anything is what makes existence unconditionally good.

The ironic thing is, if you believe you should appreciate your unhappiness, you can no longer be unhappy.

Like I said, our perceptions are what determine our emotions. We will always have perceptions, but we can change them. We do not have direct control over our opinions and perceptions, but we do have the potential to change our understandings.

We have subconscious understandings of what's important in life. We exhaust ourselves wanting, whether it is on a conscious or a subconscious level. Most of the time we don't even know that we want something; we just feel unsatisfied.

Once we identify what we want, we feel a little better. Once we analyze what we want, thoroughly, we realize we cannot justify the want. Again, we don't choose our wants.

These wants, the reason our perception of the present is usually negative, come from our standards. We have standards for everything. These standards are part of our subconscious understandings.

These standards are how we think things are supposed to be, or how things would be better. For example: We think things are supposed to be fair. If they are not fair, we perceive them as bad.

Why should things be fair, though? Is life not more interesting without certainty?

If we accept that nothing is supposed to be anything we have the opportunity to do, to act, instead of just thinking about what's wrong.

There is no such thing as "should". There is no rulebook for life. There is only what is. We all die; it's not that we should die or that we shouldn't die, it's just that we do.

We are born with the understanding that we aren't supposed to feel pain. We avoid it, but we don't know why. Pain is a feeling, if life is an opportunity to feel, pain is just as good as any other feeling. For survival purposes we are meant to dislike pain so that we don't damage our bodies, but we can't justify that understanding.

Another thing: Why do we want to live longer? We think it is good to live longer, but why? So we can experience more, right? Well, if we're avoiding experiences so that we can live longer, it defeats the whole purpose.

What is longer anyway? I mean, if you are 80 years old, you still have to live in the present. The present is a sliver of time, always moving. It's hard to understand how an amount of time so small could be appreciated... You don't have to do anything, you just have to stop doing other things: thinking about the past and future.

The reason we think about the past and future so much is because of these standards in the back of our heads. Remember the prison analogy? The reason your perceptions of your current life would be better after returning from prison is that your standards would be lowered.

The idea is, though, to eliminate standards completely. The thing about standards is that, for the most part, they aren't really attainable. As soon as your standards are met, new standards are set.

Our standards don't come from ourselves, though. We learn about life as we live, and depending on our experiences, we will have certain standards.

What you should think about is how unnecessary your standards are. Nothing controls your emotions other than your perceptions. What is actually going on around you is irrelevant, it's how you perceive those things that matters. You can't force your perceptions to change, but they are based on your standards of what is right and good, and you can bring those standards to a conscious level and question them.

When you stop thinking, in hopes of making things better, and realize there is no better, you can participate in the moment and experience like you wouldn't be able to otherwise.
 

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I decided to figure out how to be truly happy I have to find the immediate cause of all of our emotions. To discover the root of unhappiness, I think the most accurate approach is to work backwards.

I've concluded that our perceptions are the immediate factor that determines our emotions.

If we perceive things as good we are happy, if we perceive things as bad we are unhappy. It's as simple as that, except that we are not in control of our perceptions.

It is important to know that nothing can be good or bad; things can only be perceived as good or bad.

If you think your life is bad, then imagine how you would feel about it if you just got back from prison. You'd probably feel completely different about your life, yet it is the same in both scenarios. This is just an example of how perceptions are what control our emotions.

But what determines our perceptions? Perceptions, judgments, opinions: we don't choose any of them; they just happen. We don't choose what we want or what we like, but even with that being true, it's still all in our heads.

Naturally, we are made to understand certain things. We want food, water, comfort, and we have a natural understanding of what is aesthetically pleasing.

These understandings are neither right or wrong. Our emotions cannot be right or wrong. They are what they are.

The search for happiness is somewhat of a paradox. To be truly happy one must understand that all of our perceptions and judgments are formed in our minds, and that we, that our true selves, are not our minds. We are simply along for the ride.

But if that's true, we cannot want happiness. It is our mind that wants happiness, yet to be happy we must understand that what our mind wants is irrelevant.

We are observers in our bodies. Life is an opportunity to see, to do, and to feel. Negative emotions are part of that. How can it be better to feel nothing? Why would we be alive it was better to feel nothing? The chance to experience anything is what makes existence unconditionally good.

The ironic thing is, if you believe you should appreciate your unhappiness, you can no longer be unhappy.

Like I said, our perceptions are what determine our emotions. We will always have perceptions, but we can change them. We do not have direct control over our opinions and perceptions, but we do have the potential to change our understandings.

We have subconscious understandings of what's important in life. We exhaust ourselves wanting, whether it is on a conscious or a subconscious level. Most of the time we don't even know that we want something; we just feel unsatisfied.

Once we identify what we want, we feel a little better. Once we analyze what we want, thoroughly, we realize we cannot justify the want. Again, we don't choose our wants.

These wants, the reason our perception of the present is usually negative, come from our standards. We have standards for everything. These standards are part of our subconscious understandings.

These standards are how we think things are supposed to be, or how things would be better. For example: We think things are supposed to be fair. If they are not fair, we perceive them as bad.

Why should things be fair, though? Is life not more interesting without certainty?

If we accept that nothing is supposed to be anything we have the opportunity to do, to act, instead of just thinking about what's wrong.

There is no such thing as "should". There is no rulebook for life. There is only what is. We all die; it's not that we should die or that we shouldn't die, it's just that we do.

We are born with the understanding that we aren't supposed to feel pain. We avoid it, but we don't know why. Pain is a feeling, if life is an opportunity to feel, pain is just as good as any other feeling. For survival purposes we are meant to dislike pain so that we don't damage our bodies, but we can't justify that understanding.

Another thing: Why do we want to live longer? We think it is good to live longer, but why? So we can experience more, right? Well, if we're avoiding experiences so that we can live longer, it defeats the whole purpose.

What is longer anyway? I mean, if you are 80 years old, you still have to live in the present. The present is a sliver of time, always moving. It's hard to understand how an amount of time so small could be appreciated... You don't have to do anything, you just have to stop doing other things: thinking about the past and future.

The reason we think about the past and future so much is because of these standards in the back of our heads. Remember the prison analogy? The reason your perceptions of your current life would be better after returning from prison is that your standards would be lowered.

The idea is, though, to eliminate standards completely. The thing about standards is that, for the most part, they aren't really attainable. As soon as your standards are met, new standards are set.

Our standards don't come from ourselves, though. We learn about life as we live, and depending on our experiences, we will have certain standards.

What you should think about is how unnecessary your standards are. Nothing controls your emotions other than your perceptions. What is actually going on around you is irrelevant, it's how you perceive those things that matters. You can't force your perceptions to change, but they are based on your standards of what is right and good, and you can bring those standards to a conscious level and question them.

When you stop thinking, in hopes of making things better, and realize there is no better, you can participate in the moment and experience like you wouldn't be able to otherwise.
a perception is an internal representation of reality. a internal repressentation includes feelings, internal images, sounds, automatic thoughts and were ouplace your attention. its the meaning that that you give to a situation.

what creates a internal representation ? your unconcious beleifs

unconcious beleifs can be changed therefore your percepions can be changed which means emotions too can be changed

have a look at the nlp communication model. beleifs filter reality to create your perception. your perceptin creates your emotions and your emotions create you actions/behaviour
 

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beleifs filter reality to create your perception. your perceptin creates your emotions and your emotions create you actions/behaviour
all of which can reinforce other. It's the beliefs that need to change. Break the cycle, and you are halfway there.
 
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