I know for a fact that some aspects of my anxiety are probably worse now than when I was younger - I think some things just change.Looking back, I am surprised of the traveling I did. If my current self were to go back in time right now, I am unlikely to have the courage to do that again. People grow as they get older, I guess I am backwards.
That actually sounds nice to do so. Probably because you needed the recharge which is completely normal. If it's relaxing for you to do so, that itself counts as a vacation. I probably would've love to stay in a hotel/motel room for a day too here and there if it's a long travel (which wouldn't happen for me however). Any traveling I do, I usually did as much as possible in the littlest of time in a rush and cramming. Which overtime I am sure what made me lose my appeal to traveling more and more nowadays. To me now, even leisure traveling to me seems like a chore and out of my comfort zone.When it comes to travelling - I've had times when I just stayed in my room for a day or two. That happened in Thailand actually. Also happened lots of times in Indonesia. But then there were other times when I met people in restaurants or bars, met up with people I'd met online etc etc. It's weird.
Even now I have days when my anxiety is much, much worse - and others when I can just seem to do what I want. I don't think I even understand it anymore. Some of it might have to do with my moods though as well.
Not to take away from everyone else on this thread, but great work in being able to do it at all and also working out the coping mechanism. And if you don't mind a little advice from myself, it would just be to keep this phone poetry going for at least a couple of months or more if possible. It can be easy to take your current progress for granted and so start trailing off - but keeping this going can really help establish some long-term benefits (my magic number is always 12 weeks minimum), but it's up to you.I've been reciting roughly 5 minute long and very personal poetry/rapping over the phone to a group of about 15 people, most of whom I don't know very well yet, for about twice a week for the last month.
The nerves and anxiety I feel are much more intense compared to anything I feel in the average social situation. My hands start shaking and it's hard to catch my breath at first but I intentionally slow down inside a bit and take brief moments to steady my breathing while reading and it eventually settles down about halfway through on it's own.
It's showing me I can do so much more than I ever thought I could. That nerves/anxiety won't kill me. They always pass with a little time if I let them be, instead of trying to fight them and get rid of them. That if it's a new situation there will always be anxiety to some degree and to be okay with it realizing once I'm in the actual situation it's pretty much never as bad as I Imagined in my mind and many times something I would of never expected and would never of known I was missing out on something great.
Thanks! I appreciate it. :smile2: Yeah, I'm going to keep doing it as long as it's an option.Not to take away from everyone else on this thread, but great work in being able to do it at all and also working out the coping mechanism. And if you don't mind a little advice from myself, it would just be to keep this phone poetry going for at least a couple of months or more if possible. It can be easy to take your current progress for granted and so start trailing off - but keeping this going can really help establish some long-term benefits (my magic number is always 12 weeks minimum), but it's up to you.
Keep it up!
I could have written this myself so this. Ditto for the nightmare boss. Sometimes its such a struggle just to get through the day and accomplish what comes so naturally to most other people. It hasn't come easy and may not necessarily last forever but I'm grateful I've had a steady job for as long as I have.Somehow, someway I have managed to continue working through all my struggles. I have always had a job and steady income since graduating college. It is not easy...my former boss was a total nightmare, for several years...worked downtown and had to use public transportation and right now for the past year, I am working at home...which is most definitely not all it is cracked up to be,