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My ex husband just sent me this, he actually thinks he's flirting with me, I kid you not.................. :fall
The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing of one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are this year's (2005) winners:

1. Cashtration (n.):
The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

2. Ignoranus:
A person who's both stupid and an *******.

3. Intaxication:
Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation:
Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.):
The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy:
Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti:
Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm:
The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte:
To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis:
Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis:
A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon:
It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's
like, a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.):
The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

14. Glibido:
All talk and no action.

15 Dopeler effect:
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.):
The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.):
Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.):
The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

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