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After finding a job in kindergarten and being fired from it in the first day I decided to start getting treatment about my anxiety and went to psychiatrist, got medicine 2-3 weeks ago. If I cut to the chase, I was going to job interview with the confidence of now being able to talk on the phone without being so scared (which is a really good thing), to my luck, a special education and rehabilitation center wanted to have me as teacher. The thing is my major is not special education (its normal preschool education) and it's my first time being in that kind of place. I've not been with much autistic, mentally or physically disabled kids in my life too. So I have to learn how to teach them, how to treat them so they will keep me at work. Today was my third day. I know there's a camera in the class and sometimes parents watch their kids from it. I try not to stress about it and ignore it but today I found out the manager of school was watching me all day even when kids didn't arrive and saw me preparing paper work for kids. She criticized me telling I should leave that job to assistant teachers and I should do this do that. Whole day I felt anxious thinking someone should be watching me right now and will tell me I do this wrong. All criticizing and feeling of being "not enough" takes my self confidence. Learning how to talk to people and be social + how to be a good special education teacher seems hard to me. Would you keep working in this situation or would you look for another job? Is this a harsh way to confront with anxiety? :afr
 

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The Beautiful Struggle
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Well first of all i think having your employer and the parents being able to watch you is a load a pressure id say for the average person so you should not feel like theres something wrong with you in particular. I for one would be nervous in that scenario as well and to add criticism to it makes it worst. If you feel your doing your best and its still not good enough then maybe its time to move on as this could cause you to stress out on a daily. If you do leave you shouldn't feel down on yourself if you know you've given it your all.
 

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I'd keep trying and see if I could grow to like it or at least get used to it. Some jobs take time to get accustomed to, this might be one of those jobs. I'm sure as you get to know the kids better you'll be able to handle them better. But if over time you see no improvement in your anxiety or in your work production, or if you feel too pressured by your superiors, then I'd probably look for another job because it's clear that this one isn't the right one for me and I'd only be torturing myself to stay here. So overall I would say give it a little more time and see how it goes, and if it doesn't improve or if it even gets worse I'd start looking for other jobs. But Good Luck! :)
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Well first of all i think having your employer and the parents being able to watch you is a load a pressure id say for the average person so you should not feel like theres something wrong with you in particular. I for one would be nervous in that scenario as well and to add criticism to it makes it worst. If you feel your doing your best and its still not good enough then maybe its time to move on as this could cause you to stress out on a daily. If you do leave you shouldn't feel down on yourself if you know you've given it your all.
I'm not sure if I'm doing my best. I am usually so quiet with other teachers and parents of kids. I feel better with kids normally (when the times I am sure no one is watching. :D) Still right now I feel like an alien who came from Mars. :b Thanks for comment. ^_^
I'd keep trying and see if I could grow to like it or at least get used to it. Some jobs take time to get accustomed to, this might be one of those jobs. I'm sure as you get to know the kids better you'll be able to handle them better. But if over time you see no improvement in your anxiety or in your work production, or if you feel too pressured by your superiors, then I'd probably look for another job because it's clear that this one isn't the right one for me and I'd only be torturing myself to stay here. So overall I would say give it a little more time and see how it goes, and if it doesn't improve or if it even gets worse I'd start looking for other jobs. But Good Luck! :)
Thank you! I asked for some books from the manager and took them home thinking maybe they will help me adapt better. I guess I will first finish reading them then see if I can still do it or not.
 

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Wow, well kudos to you to dealing with this situation! I think most anyone, let alone someone with anxiety issues, would be pretty uneasy with being watched on camera all day like that! I think for the job itself, you're doing the right thing - ask for help and guidance for how to best deal with your students and their needs. That is tough for any teacher to do with special needs kids, and especially a new teacher...so never be reluctant to ask for help. If the managers are well trained themselves, they will know that you need support and praise to get comfortable and be the best teacher you can be - and I think with those two things and familiarity your anxiety in the classroom will lessen.
 

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Don't quit.
This is your first time working in this environment and you said yourself this isn't what you majored in so there's always going to be a learning curve. They hired you even though this wasn't your major so they obviously believe you can do the job.

And don't view the managers advice as criticism because at this stage she's training you and showing you the ropes. View it as constructive criticism. A positive not a negative.
 

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Wow that's a lot of pressure. Yeah, like one of the above posters said, there's a lot of pressure there even for "normal" people. I wouldn't quit though, because each experience is another step forward for you. Just try to yank the experience and take the most you can from it, because you never know if you'll have the chance again to be able to have an experience like that to learn from.
 

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Sure, it's pressure, but you love teaching so just get in the zone and do what you do...if others can see your enthusiasm then they will be enthusiastic about you.

Btw, may I ask how you got fired from kindergarten in one day?
 

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You can do anything you set your mind to. You must be confident in yourself though. I think you should love yourself for ego you are. Anxiety mixed with being a teacher doesn't sound like s good combination until you learn how to overvoome your anxiety. I would do some serious work on yourself. Do a self reflextion on yourself. If you'd like I can give you many many tools for beating your anxiety and any other negative feeling. Give me a pm if you'd like to learn. I'd be glad to help. Your career depends on it. I have coping tools that Counselors and psyxhologists don't even know about yet. I'm willing to share all of my wisdom learned through experience how to defeat your anxiety.


After finding a job in kindergarten and being fired from it in the first day I decided to start getting treatment about my anxiety and went to psychiatrist, got medicine 2-3 weeks ago. If I cut to the chase, I was going to job interview with the confidence of now being able to talk on the phone without being so scared (which is a really good thing), to my luck, a special education and rehabilitation center wanted to have me as teacher. The thing is my major is not special education (its normal preschool education) and it's my first time being in that kind of place. I've not been with much autistic, mentally or physically disabled kids in my life too. So I have to learn how to teach them, how to treat them so they will keep me at work. Today was my third day. I know there's a camera in the class and sometimes parents watch their kids from it. I try not to stress about it and ignore it but today I found out the manager of school was watching me all day even when kids didn't arrive and saw me preparing paper work for kids. She criticized me telling I should leave that job to assistant teachers and I should do this do that. Whole day I felt anxious thinking someone should be watching me right now and will tell me I do this wrong. All criticizing and feeling of being "not enough" takes my self confidence. Learning how to talk to people and be social + how to be a good special education teacher seems hard to me. Would you keep working in this situation or would you look for another job? Is this a harsh way to confront with anxiety? :afr
 
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