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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
And by easy, I don't mean I flutter around like a social butterfly. No way. But if someone is welcoming and friendly and they feel 'safe', I usually have no problem chatting with them.

But I haven't made deep connections with a person in real life in years now. One of my closest friends from high school, he and I haven't spoken in 7 months. It's mostly my fault because I'm a bad friend. I'm really good at pushing people away, but it doesn't mean it hurts deep deep deep down inside.

Online is a different story. I've made a couple of close friendships, but recently, after being friends with this person for almost 3 years now, I've felt that urge to just ruin things. That horrible feeling in the pit of your stomach and the tightening in your throat. I can't think clearly at all. I'm afraid I'll do something wrong now.

I don't want to push her away because of my own insecurities. I care about her a lot. She's pretty much my best friend. Other than superficial classmate friendships, she's basically one of the two people I talk to on a regular basis about things that are important to me.

Does anyone else have a similar SA problem?
 

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Lol yes. This is one of my biggest issues right now. I have a tendency of pushing people away. I am thankful to have friends but they come and go pretty quick. I just stop returning phone calls, quit jobs and move on. I've been labeled as an ******* but truth is, relationships scare the absolute hell out of me. I look at it like this; One more friend is just another person I have to write off before they write me off. It's gotten to the point where I'm telling people to get out of my life and **** off before I truly even get to know them. It's not good. That's one of the things that brought me here tonight. You have to let people in. I don't know the reasons why but I'm told you need to... Sorry, I've never been good at the friends thing.
 

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I also struggle with this. I make casual friends ok, people I work with or people from school or uni. But once I move on and leave uni, or leave a job the friendships usually go with it. It's like I have some sort of barrier that stops me getting close enough to people to develop anything deeper.
 
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