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Are there other women out there with SA who are scared (even terrified) of becoming pregnant and being responsible for a new life? I want to be a mom someday, but becoming pregnant and the whole process of physical and mental changes and the morning sickness terrifies me. The weird thing is that I love kids, especially toddler age. Maybe I have watched the movie "Knocked Up" one time too many. Any suggestions on how to calm my fears and maybe advice from someone who has children can suggest advice too? Thanks!
 

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I'd love to have kids. lol Except, I'd never have them, both wouldn't and couldn't, not in this situation. But one thing they'd do is give me purpose for life. Plus that would cool on many other ways. :yes Although, I'm a guy, so I don't have to deal with nearly as much as a women. lol
 

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I like kids but I can't imagine having them because there are certain things that I should be able to do in order to have them and I can't imagine myself being able to do any of those things as of right now.
 

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I hate babies so the thought of having one in my body just freaks me right out. Just...ugh I find it so disgusting to think about, I'm not willing to go through a near death experience to bring some ugly little creature into a world like this anyway lol.
 

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I actually just had a pregnancy scare. With SAD, I think stress causes me many missed periods. Just the idea of having a baby really put my life into perspective.
It's terrifying. I'd love to have kids one day, but it's all about timing. You'll KNOW when you're ready...isn't that how it should be? Most people base when they should have children off of financial security and security within their marriages/relationships...but we need to consider our emotional security! Particularly with postpartum depression and other mental and emotional strains pregnancy and parenthood can cause. That doesn't mean wait forever because conditions will never be 100% perfect, but consider therapy and other counseling, support groups for parents, etc. when you're ready to have a baby.
That way you can feel positive that not only will you be emotionally ready to handle it, but the baby will be born into a mentally stable environment!
 

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I have been pregnant before. Im not a mother. Ill let you figure that one out.
Emotionally it was a nightmare.. first getting 'the look' from the doctor and hearing 'Its positive!'.. Then realising just how much my life changed in an instant.. Then realising, you had to tell your parents.. Then loosing the life growing inside you.. Then the emotional attachment begins.. and the guilt that comes after its gone.. maybe it was more emotional because I knew it wasnt going to work out then.
More physically, my boobs hurt more than I can describe, I got dizzy spells and I ate a tone of junkfood, put on 30kgs in a matter of a few months. That I still havnt lost.

Since then, Ive got a massive obsessive craving for being a mother now. As soon as I miss a period, I get excited, then dissappointed, then depressed.

My thoughts on motherhood now.. Childbirth?.. meh, I reckon I could deal with it, thats why EPIDURAL was invented, I think the birth part is the least of your worries.. no sleep?.. meh, eventually you get sleep right, ya have to.. to live?.. giving up my life/ambitions/dreams for my child?.. Well Im not too sure about right now, theres so much I want to do with my life, being a mother is one of them, but so is travel, and cant do much of that with a child right, I also want a stable home, somewhere I can make a home?.. I dont right now.. Breastfeeding? Noooooooooooooo! Ouchie!*Runs away*

There is sooo much to think about, and once the stick reads positive it will all come crashing down on you. Things you never even bothered to think about.. and you see why its not an easy decision. But at the same time. Its the best feeling you ever had as well as the worst feeling of anxiety you'll ever have. Well that was my experience anyway.
 

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I hate babies so the thought of having one in my body just freaks me right out. Just...ugh I find it so disgusting to think about, I'm not willing to go through a near death experience to bring some ugly little creature into a world like this anyway lol.
"Near death experience", hardly, unless you have some rare complications during child birth. Studies have shown women who have given birth and raised babies tend to live longer than women who have not.
 

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I'm not scared at all. I love children and can't wait to raise my own(I've already had a hand at it, it's not too bad and they weren't scarred for life or anything, lol). I won't say anything about birth because we all know it's not exactly the best part. Anyway, I think I'll be a great mother despite the sa. It wouldn't keep me from taking my kids out and doing things with them or hinder my ability to raise them, so why not have them?

Just have to find a husband/father, and that's where the sa comes in...
 

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Are there other women out there with SA who are scared (even terrified) of becoming pregnant and being responsible for a new life? I want to be a mom someday, but becoming pregnant and the whole process of physical and mental changes and the morning sickness terrifies me. The weird thing is that I love kids, especially toddler age. Maybe I have watched the movie "Knocked Up" one time too many. Any suggestions on how to calm my fears and maybe advice from someone who has children can suggest advice too? Thanks!
Mom, of 1 (so far) and SA sufferer
Being a Mom is the most difficult thing I have ever done. It is emotionally and physically draining. As a mom I am not as patient as I thought would be and Motherhood is a lot more difficult than I ever imagined it to be. I get stressed out and overwhelmed very easily. Yet, I would never take it back and it is also the most rewarding thing I have ever done. This may not make sense now, but it will someday when you become a Mom.
It is COMPLETELY normal to have fears about pregnancy and motherhood. Some of them may come true and some may not. It is natural to fear you will not be a good Mom, that your body will be all gross after having a baby,etc
About your fears of pregnancy based on my experience: physically, yes your body does change a lot during pregnancy, but there are positives to that too, my hub told me the other day he misses my preggo body b/c my butt and boobs were bigger, lol. Physical changes after the baby: hardly any I lost all my preggo weight and then some. My stomach is as flat and tight as it was before pregnancy. I did not get any stretchmarks. Not everyone is like this, but it is possible. Mental changes: Yes, during pregnancy your hormones are going crazy I was an angry psycho b****, but hey my hub is still with me and he wants to have another one someday. Morning sickness: I never got it. But, I did suffer from back pain and other common pregnancy annoyances. Pregnancy, for me, was difficult b/c it felt like my body was not my own anymore and it was being taken over. Some women love being pregnant, I did not--I found it extremely uncomfortable. It was well worth it in the end though. When you see your baby for the 1st time, you will know what I mean.

If you have any other questions please message me.
 

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I'd rather not become pregnant for several, several, several, several years.
 

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I'm not scared at all. I just don't want to. The thought of being pregnant is gross to me.

I've strongly considered becoming a foster parent or adopting one day though.
 

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I went through a very similar thing Aurora, :( took me close to year
to shake the depression.
I am scared of becoming pregnant just because atm I can't take
care of myself let alone a little baba. I'm more scared
that I might not be able to have a child.:afr I'm clucky as anything,
I think I'd be a wonderful mum.

The giving birth part doesnt sound so fun C-Section over here thanks!


 

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Are there other women out there with SA who are scared (even terrified) of becoming pregnant and being responsible for a new life? I want to be a mom someday, but becoming pregnant and the whole process of physical and mental changes and the morning sickness terrifies me. The weird thing is that I love kids, especially toddler age. Maybe I have watched the movie "Knocked Up" one time too many. Any suggestions on how to calm my fears and maybe advice from someone who has children can suggest advice too? Thanks!
Don't do "it" :lol
Seriously, this is probably a more common fear than you think. I doubt you would be thinking about this when the future motherhood actually appears.
 

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Yes pregnancy/labour/ taking care of a baby is kinda crazy, but honestly, if you are 'scared' in ANY WAY, then I really don't think you should even be having sex.

I wish people would realize that ANY TIME you have sex, a baby can be the result. So go on and whinge about how terrified you are about getting pregnant, but you are the one who puts yourself in the position to GET pregnant anyway. If you were really that scared, you wouldn't be doing it in my opinion.


/sigh
 

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Oh and for the record, I was a mom at 23 (28 now) and I have been a mom through major depression, agoraphobia, SA and bipolar, and we are both still alive.

Having any type of mental issue doesn't not mean you will be a ****ty parent. So that, at least, should not be a worry.
 

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Hello,

To be honest with you, yes I'm a mother and have one child, who is 2 y/o now. Pregnancy is different for different women. But I hear constantly that pregnancy can be liberating and make women feel wonderful and sexy. In my experience of pregnancy I felt as if I had an illness. Pregnancy gave me heartburn and did strange things to my skin and also I couldn't eat very much as most food made me feel very sick. Childbirth was long and labour pains is a battle. Looking back on it I wish I'd had a C-section. Motherhood was stressful for me and now she is in nursery 5 days a week.
 
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