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Hello everybody. This is my first post. I have had social anxiety disorder as long as I can remember - im 56 now - but even at 4 I remember how I couldn't seem to join in with other children, hanging desperately and shamefully around the edges of parties, and kicking myself more and more, destroying my self esteem. I would like to say things got better as I got older, but really they didn't - that part of me that was the shamed child still lurked to be kicked into life in trigger situations, which without really realising I spent much of my energy avoiding and living a lie with the handful of friends I had clicked with, and who didn't trigger the SAD. It took decades but I lost even those friends because I had never been able to be open with them about this side of me - it just became apparent as they grew and I didn't. I don't know, but perhaps we people with SAD tend to be the sensitive and intelligent ones - by which I mean perhaps as kids we try to think things through but sometimes tie ourselves up in terrible knots of confusion.. I personally think that is what SAD is - confusion - leading us to go into social situations stressed, vulnerable, shamed and unsuccessful - and its made worse as we interact with the sometimes confusion, judgement, and agendas of others. What a mess, but its not our fault - how can the confusion and distress of a tiny child be that childs 'fault'. But if the problem, as distressing and destructive as it can be, is a knot - then 'knots' can be undone - we live in a physical world after all - we may not see how to untie our personal knot - but it can be done. Anyway, perhaps our knots are similar, or different, I don't know - but I did recently read the following article - and it had a remarkable effect on me - somehow for me it untied a knot of confusion that had held me down all my life - and I have recently become far more outgoing with all sorts of people - and incredibly finding most people responding with warmth. Im not saying it will work for anyone else, but in my particular case the article was a starting point (followed by carefully reading 'the power of positive thinking' by Napoleon Hill, which somehow seems to feed into the article) that is making huge inroads into into what seemed an impossible problem.
http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/wendy-squires-20140408-36azm.html
 
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