It's past 1 am and I'm wide awake not wanting to go to sleep because tomorrow is Monday back to work day. Feels a bit like knowing you're gonna die tomorrow and clinging to your last day on earth not wanting it to end lol. I have serious thoughts of quitting my job and just doing nothing - by which I mean, working part time flexibly, and spending the extra spare time on therapy, self care, going to parks, galleries, theatre, travels, fitness classes, art classes, join clubs, eat at good restaurants,...
I have some savings that could last me a couple of years easy (probably longer with the part time income), and I am unattached with no dependents. It's not like I'm tied down by responsibilities like other people my age with young kids and whatnot. I don't know why I'm so scared of the thought of quitting with no "back-up plan". If the back-up plan is another job that sticks me in a cubicle (or chains me to my laptop) for the best parts of the week, then wtf is the point of living?
Sometimes I almost feel like homelessness would be preferable, or getting into a car accident and losing a limb or something, because at least it would jolt me out of my rut and really force me to live differently. But maybe I'm just being stupid.