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immortal in the making
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi people!! I'm quite new to this site, and have recently had a great idea, and I need as much help as I can get. For everybody's benefit.
Basically, I want to increase public awarness of the crippling mental disorder that we all share and have in common. I'm sure that many of you will agree here, that part of our problem is a lack of support from the people we know and love. Our few friends that are occasionally by our side, and our family that just dont know what to do. We can't get better on our own, but if they dont know exactly what S.A.D. is, how bad it can affect us throughout our lives or how they can help, how CAN they help?
Social Anxiety has only been medically recognised over the last decade or 2 (if i remember correctly), and is still going under research for what exactly causes it and whatever else they want to find out. So lets do what we can to help the world help us!!
My idea's are still in an early stage, but we need to try and get support from the media, health services and more!!
I'm no expert on Social Anxiety, as i've only been diagnosed 5 weeks ago, and only since then have I been looking at help for it. But we can all have a part to play here.
Anyone who has idea's on how we can educate the public, PLEASE feel free to make your suggestions here!! And anyone who can, or KNOW'S anyone who can put idea's into practice, AGAIN, please do so!! Then let us know how things go with it.
Personally, I'm practically crapping myself as i write this as the realisation sinks in to how big a job this could be. BUT I WONT let this stop me. We have all been suffering too long with people saying "Oh, you'll get over it! Just face you fear!", and i know that it could help me, and you AND everybodyelse with the more hands on we are with this. Who knows, a heavy involvement in this may help to cure us?!
I need your support, and i hope i havent wrote this in vain. I dont get these confidence trips very often.
So one last time, let's educate the world the best we can, and all get better!

Thanks for reading!
 

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immortal in the making
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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
One of my first thoughts is to have something televised. After doing a bit of research into getting anything aired, my first main problem arises.
Do we go for a documentary (like Panorama), or some kind of drama where the main character is a sufferer of Social Anxiety?
I pose this question to discussion :)
Any help will be appreciated.
Thank you!!
 

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Fall 7 times, stand up 8.
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I think a documentary would be more effective because people usually associate dramas with works of fiction. Although I do think a popular show making a character have SA could make an impact. A documentary is real, and allows for an in-depth look at the day-to-day basis of an SA sufferer. Sort of like Real Life on MTV. x]
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
If there is enough support from the UK, i'll try and get both. But hearing what you said, a documentary does seem best. Would need to be a high profile thing tho, as my only concern with just a docu was that if it was only one show, and LOADS of people miss it, it would be pointless. But at least with a drama, there's a new episode that deepens every week etc. hmm.. choices. lol.
 

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People could start watching the show in the middle of the story and misinterpret SA because they hadn't seen the earlier parts.
Yes, choices. :( I have a very difficult time making them.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
your not the only one :) that's why i brought it to the forum. i've found an email address for a programme that does documentaries in the UK on the BBC. They dont really do this kinda thing, but after getting some facts together, i'll email them and get some guidance from them.
 

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I just read a self help book that went over this SA isnt well known because it isnt televised it went on to say that its because a character with SA wouldn't be very entertaining to portray. Someone who hardly speaks and is afraid of interaction etc.

I think mtv did a documentary type thing on SA but I never saw it myself.
 

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I just read a self help book that went over this SA isnt well known because it isnt televised it went on to say that its because a character with SA wouldn't be very entertaining to portray. Someone who hardly speaks and is afraid of interaction etc.
Who says the character has to communicate to the audience via spoken dialog?

It could easily be done with a voice over, kind of like listening to his or her "thoughts". Inter cut with scenes that are going on around their lives if necessary.
 

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I have mixed feelings about this. First I feel you have good intentions but you are not seeing the practicalities or the reality here.

It is not good to tell your employer you have social anxiety as that is not their problem. You are there to perform and get paid. It is unreasonable for them to bend to you and you are likely to get fired. Physical disability is one thing but this is not. I would not hire someone who told me this if they had to deal with people and communicate well. Communciation, both verbal and written are number one and a very basic employment requirement. I have worked at jobs myself below my intellectual capacity because of past tramua that affected my ability to communicate with the public or even show a happy outgoing personality with co-workers. I have never faulted employers for this problem I have had. I have worked at many types of jobs, have had set backs, etc. but I do not tell people at work that I have a problem with anxiety that extends to social situations. I often seek to protect those at work that show similar problems also.

Number two, you don't need your family to help you recover and in numerous cases they have caused it as per expert Dr. Richard of the Social Anxiety Institute and other experts have said. Psychologists will tell you rightly that you need to accept that your family is how they are and stop expecting help from them as that is prolonging your anxiety problem with them and others. Families often cause the problem by aggression or neglect or being completely obvilous to the needs of their various children and failing to develop a trusting bond. Indirectly, they did not do their job to help you if others at school or neighbors etc. were the primary direct cause of your problem today. They may not be responsible for it, but in many cases they are to some degree how it started. You are still responsible for how you processed your thoughts and what you told yourself, but it cannot be overlooked that parents can tell children things that are very damaging labels about themselves or their future. The impact is underestimated and trying to convince the very same people to also help you is not reasonable. The word "help" means "support" and some people are incapable of showing that and it is like trying to draw water from a dry well. Let's not hate or blame parents or siblings here but they are not the answer. If they cannot understand from you telling them yourself, it is unlikely they will care otherwise and may turn it around on you instead with more labels now only of mental illness even if it is only an emotional problem.

Number three, it is not good to have people in general know you have this as they will take advantage of you. If you have ever studied self defense, you will know that one of the most very basic tenets is not to look like a lone isolated person. Criminals target these people. They seek them out in some cases and in other cases the person reveals it and they take the opportunity to harm them. Just like you don't want to walk in some areas isolated, nor do you want to reveal that you are also lacking a social structure or know how to communicate. Many women have been raped for this reason, because the rapist knew they were timid and didn't have friends/family support and they wouldn't have the guts to go to the police or have the support from others to do that. People scam others for money by isolating them and gaining their confidence. The con person is the "only one" that can help them they think, not knowing the person is a con person. Criminals look to go after those who are alone. That is why you should never feel bad about lying about having a small social structure to others even if you do not. It is none of their business and it is for your protection to say that. Cults and strange anti-social groups also look for those who are without a social structure.

There is a stigma on this problem like many other problems and only a good therapist or support group or good friends understand. Those resources exist along with many books on how to be assertive. It may be hard finding a therapist but they exist. In anything, the mental health professionals need to be educated on how prevalent the problem is and how to help people. It is not the general public's business to be supportive.

We have to help ourselves, slowly with help of some choice people perhaps. We cannot expect the "world" at large to help us. They are unreliable and it is dangerous also.
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
indeedy!! it's going to be hard to do. but the world (the optimist in me speaking) needs to hear how hard it is for us to live our lives, so that they can stop making it so hard. all it's going to take is the right mixture to make not just a good show, but educational as well.
i believe it is possible. if people put the effort in.
 

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I have mixed feelings about this. First I feel you have good intentions but you are not seeing the practicalities or the reality here.

It is not good to tell your employer you have social anxiety as that is not their problem. You are there to perform and get paid. It is unreasonable for them to bend to you and you are likely to get fired. Physical disability is one thing but this is not. I would not hire someone who told me this if they had to deal with people and communicate well. Communciation, both verbal and written are number one and a very basic employment requirement.
Actually Social anxiety is an accepted disability under the ADA and by law your employer must reasonably accommodate you. It is also against the law not to hire someone because of a disability.

Of course the employer has the word "reasonable" to work with.
 

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I think it's a brilliant idea, and I reckon the BBC would be the best channel to go for because the do the best documentaries.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
thanks for your view there Sunshine009, but you just reminded me of another reason i came up with this idea. how many of us have suffered feeling alone for many years and like we are the only one feeling the things we do? too many people suffer longer without treatment than they need to. i'd only heard a small little bit of nothing about "social phobia" before being diagnosed by my GP. then after researching the disorder, had so many questions answered.
my first thought onto this idea was to originally help undiagnosed sufferers see that they are not alone.
and just for the record, i work in a largish shop as a store supervisor, and have been there for over 5 years. in my job, i have to get the staff to do their work on time, serve customers on till, and also sort out problems left right and center (refunds, complaints IT issues etc), and my deputy manager feels no less for me as an employee, and i cant remember what i was about to say next :s
but anyway, i understand what you were saying and will take into account.
thank you :)
 

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Actually Social anxiety is an accepted disability under the ADA and by law your employer must reasonably accommodate you. It is also against the law not to hire someone because of a disability.

Of course the employer has the word "reasonable" to work with.
Yes but they are likely going to find someone else to hire who is qualified for the responsibilities and tell you a false reason for not hiring you but one that seems to make legal sense. They are looking for the most qualified person after all and there are other people who can do the job better who they can hire. You are still stigmatized.

I think the problem with social anxiety have existed forever but because of the world is how it is, people could not pinpoint the problem for years because they knew it causes problems with other people either at work or taking advantage of them in personal settings. The world is a scary place in many ways.

If I ran a business and needed to hire one person to answer the phones, do office work, and fill orders and talk to suppliers, I'm not going to hire someone with a high degree of social anxiety. I'd hire someone who would do what they had to do. If I ran a cleaning service however, I would hire people with social anxiety before anyone else.
 

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thanks for your view there Sunshine009, but you just reminded me of another reason i came up with this idea. how many of us have suffered feeling alone for many years and like we are the only one feeling the things we do? too many people suffer longer without treatment than they need to. i'd only heard a small little bit of nothing about "social phobia" before being diagnosed by my GP. then after researching the disorder, had so many questions answered.
my first thought onto this idea was to originally help undiagnosed sufferers see that they are not alone.
and just for the record, i work in a largish shop as a store supervisor, and have been there for over 5 years. in my job, i have to get the staff to do their work on time, serve customers on till, and also sort out problems left right and center (refunds, complaints IT issues etc), and my deputy manager feels no less for me as an employee, and i cant remember what i was about to say next :s
but anyway, i understand what you were saying and will take into account.
thank you :)
Your manager knows your capabilites and you have earned his/her trust over time. In your situation, it is different than other work situations.

But when you go for a job, no trust has been earned yet, excepting your employment record and references are stellar. Sometimes people don't have that and it would cost them getting a job. Also not everyone excels at their job when they have one and if they say they have a problem, the manager may think that it will not change as you have labeled yourself so and so may look for a reason to fire them.

If you have had a job for a while and excel at it, it is a different situation to tell your superiors about this problem as they believe in you. To them, they may think your problem is nothing. It is like a famous actor telling people of their flaws, no one cares and it makes them look humble and better if anything! But if they were starting out or having severe problems, it would only harm them.
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
to be fair though, someone with social anxiety isnt going to apply for that kinda job. plus, what if they have a specific type of social anxiety. there's no black and white here. there never is when it comes to the mind.
oh, and i wouldnt really wanna be a cleaner, as i cant really imagine the possible scrutinization of people watching me clean stuff.
and back to the general employment thing, i work for a company called The Co-operative, in the UK, and it's actually in our "rules" that we dont discriminate people with disabilities. and to show this, one of the girls we have during the day shift actually has dyslexia and dyspraxia (or whatever it is).
now my mind has gone blank again. i think i'm getting tired. lol
 

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Yes but they are likely going to find someone else to hire who is qualified for the responsibilities and tell you a false reason for not hiring you but one that seems to make legal sense. They are looking for the most qualified person after all and there are other people who can do the job better who they can hire. You are still stigmatized.

I think the problem with social anxiety have existed forever but because of the world is how it is, people could not pinpoint the problem for years because they knew it causes problems with other people either at work or taking advantage of them in personal settings. The world is a scary place in many ways.

If I ran a business and needed to hire one person to answer the phones, do office work, and fill orders and talk to suppliers, I'm not going to hire someone with a high degree of social anxiety. I'd hire someone who would do what they had to do. If I ran a cleaning service however, I would hire people with social anxiety before anyone else.
You could say the same thing about a physical disability. Any job that would do that is probably one you don't want to work for in the first place and you still have to have the skills and experience to work the job, disability or not. The point is to strive for understanding, and get society at large not to be so cold hearted towards people with SA of course we should accept it but it dosen't hurt to try to change it and campaign for equal rights. The more knowledge is out there the more people know it is a serious problem and we can do something to help people.
 
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