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Hi

I'm going to University this fall and scared for my life. I was wondering if anyone here had any experiences to share on this subject. Was it hell? Not as bad as you expected? Or not what you expected? Anything you would do differently? Maybe it was pointless? I am interested in any feedback you might have since I have no idea what to expect. :um
 

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Everything was fine and dandy until courses started calling for group projects. Most of the time, I'd ask the professor to hook me up, or did it by myself if it wasn't mandatory. It's easier to blend into the crowd than highschool, but in highschool, they forced you to talk to other people, which made getting to know people easier. In college, if you don't take the initiative, you will be pretty isolated. It wasn't until my third year, after they forced all of us to go on a camp in the middle of nowhere for a course, that I started making 'friends'.
 

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Well, it was MUCH better than high school. I'm from a rural area where I didn't fit in at all, and people were pretty nasty to me from adolescence onward. I couldn't believe how easy it was to just blend in with my surroundings at university. I didn't make a whole lot of friends, but I felt much saner there. My only problem moments came during the weekends, when I would get really stressed out about not being invited to parties or whatever, and about the fact that even if I was invited, I wasn't really interested in that scene (because it contained people who were mostly superficial).

Still it was a positive experience overall.
 

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I agree with Sanspants08. Infinitely better than High School. It seemed to me like folks are not as judgemental or clicky in college.

The good thing for you is that alot of people will be starting in the Fall and most of them will be looking for friends, so take advantage of your first couple of weeks and try to talk to people, if you can.

Are you staying in dorms or university apartments? Its much easier to make friends if you live with other students than if you live at home.

Good luck.
 

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Best experience: Taking art classes, cause it's easier to socialize with people. In the other classes I tended to avoid people, which is usually easy to do. By the end of the semester it can be depressing when everyone else seems to be talking to each other before class starts. Try to look out for the other quiet people. Maybe you can exchange info with someone like that in case you wind up missing classes due to anxiety (it happens), and get notes from each other. I think there are always quiet people around at the start, but they might not show up very often later on, so try to do it in the first few days, if you're up for it. Just say, hey do you want to exchange emails in case we miss any classes, or something like that.

Worst experience: Living in a loud party neighborhood. Drunk people yelling and playing music on weekends while you're sitting at home alone is really depressing. If you have the option, live in a quiet neighborhood.
 

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It took a really long time for me to adjust...like at least 3 years. Even now it can be hard, but this last year has been so nice compared to the past.

Take an Asian language class. People are really friendly. Take classes where people are first year students, they're new and tend to be more willing to make new friends then people who have already developed cliques. Take classes that are 50/50 male and female. If you're a female, a female-dominant class can become really b*tchy. Until this last year, I thought everyone was just partying at clubs and getting drunk, both of which I hate. But it's not true, everyone isn't like that, and you don't have to force yourself into high stress situations just to feel "normal".

What I would have done differently: not let my social anxiety keep me from taking classes I really wanted to take. I wish I had joined a club. Most of all, DON'T LET FEAR PARALYSE YOU. If you have to go to a counsellor or take meds, do it.

Better than high school, definitely.
 

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It was hell at first. Because I couldn't/wouldn't connect with anyone in my dorm. But I am glad I have lived on campus all this time. Being around roommates has taught me a lot of important lessons. So if you can live on campus you should even if it sounds like it will be hard. Things are gradually getting better though. I think it is because I am forced to be around people I don't know more often. I am slowly learning how to connect with people my age. Another part of the reason I am getting better is because I am growing up and realizing what is important in life and what is not. What is important is trying to overcome SA and having a good time in college. There were a lot of nice people in that dorm that I could have been friends with but I was too scared.
 
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