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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
How do you feel as a socially anxious person about the restart of normal relationships post covid?
I actually enjoyed the past year since for once in my life everybody in the whole world seemed to be just like me. Mostly at home, no social life and less commitments (socially).

It gave me a calm feeling, I have felt quite good about it all. Gone were the phonecalls or text messages of people wanting to meet up. I never felt pressure to look for a job.We were all in the same boat, we were one. The world finally reached equality.

But now the real world will come back with a vengeance, the media reports booms in people meeting up, bars and restaurants can’t keep up with reservations etc. People act as if life now finally begins again.
it all makes me quite anxious again. I really liked the slow way of life.

I have been a bit hesitant in starting this thread because I see signals that even most people in here are actually happy everything is going back to normal but for me the past year is what I call normal.

I absolutely dread having to show up at gatherings (weddings, funerals, parties you name it) again. It is not that I did a lot of those things pre covid ( often find myself a good excuse not to go) but during covid I didn’t need to find any excuses at all and nobody not a single soul in the world have judged me for it (unlike in normal years). For one year I got to feel totally relaxed, I can now feel the pre covid daily stresses creeping up again.
 

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I liked that I had more time to learn topics I wanted to be knowledgeable in and I was looking forward for places to reopen so that I could hang out with people and make connections. Life is composed of obstacles and triumphs. If we don't continue growing, then our skills will deteriorate. I don't want to continue living in fear because I feel socially anxious around others. If the desire is stronger than the fear, then anyone can change. I don't want to regret not having fun experiences with people. I don't want my social anxiety to limit the quality of life I want. Online conversations aren't as fulfilling as in person conversations.
 

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---------------------------- ▓▓▓▓Groovy▓▓▓▓
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It doesn't really impact me as I have no social life - I mean, this forum is about the extent of a social life for me 🙃 The only calls I get are from bill collectors, telemarketers, some company that keeps trying to get me to purchase a warranty on a car I no longer own, and my family.

I kind of like it that way, but I definitely could see where it would be bothersome for some people. I think if I started having calls from people that I like, asking me to go out to public places, yet I wanted to remain friends in only the loosest of terms such as online I would get frustrated with it as well.

Friendships are a commitment, that is for sure. It sucks to be in the place you and others are in now.
 

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I've been surprisingly happy about it. But weddings, funerals and parties are once a decade things for me, and I never go to bars or restaurants, and there's nobody inviting me to anything. My interactions are just voluntarily going to meetup groups and I'm glad to be able to do that again. If I had anything mandatory or pressured, I expect I'd feel differently.

Although I do miss having an excuse for putting off the dentist.
 

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I think everyone is being rash and stupid. The pandemic isn't over yet but people are acting like it is. And I suppose that's their prerogative -- everyone else can risk their lives as they see fit. As for me, however, I will continue to quarantine myself for the foreseeable future, only going out when necessary and then ALWAYS wearing my mask. Though of course this isn't much of a change from pre-pandemic life; I've always been a homebody. It was nice to have my lifestyle normalized for awhile, even if it did take people dying.

My mother wants to attend a Father's Day get-together with her friend. I know she's feeling lonely being cooped up here with only me for company now that my dad is gone. But I've already explained that I am NOT risking my life to mingle with a bunch of people I barely know -- something I really have no interest in doing even without the threat of a deadly virus. I told her I can drive her there and pick her up but I will not participate. I think she didn't appreciate that...
 

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Bleep blorp blop bip boop
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Really no change for me. Although I guess it's cool to be able to go get breakfast or something like that (by myself). I never got invited to anything nor really hung out with anybody before, during, and probably not after either. I've always avoided packed stores, so will continue to do so pandemic or not. Although not applicable to me, I'm happy for those who have terrible home lives to be able to get away from that.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Well there won't be much change for me either to be honest. But now there is the possibility that I will be dragged out of my house (to do things I don't want to do), this was not the case in the past year due to corona. This possibility is what what makes me nervous...
The previous yearn body asked anything and nobody expected anything as everything was prohibited. Now I'll have to find excuses again so I can divert a potential nervous breakdown!
 

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Failure's Art
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I have really mixed feelings about everything. The last 12-15 months have been great for an avoidant loner like me. I've been more isolated than at any other point in my life and honestly I've loved it. Unlike a lot of people on this forum I actually crave long periods of extreme isolation, and isolation for it's own sake not just because people make me anxious and I want to avoid them. Then on the flip side however I know all of this isolation has certainly retarded what limited social skills and connections I had. And that will probably just make things even tougher for me, both in the immediate future as I attempt to awkwardly rejoin society but also longer term as well.

Aside from SA and social considerations, I am glad that the worst of this does seem to be behind us (in the US and much of the West at least). I'm fully vaccinated now and feel like I can go out and do some things I need to do that I was putting off before and not worry about contracting Covid or making anyone else sick. I am looking forward to getting back to some kind of normal in that regard.
 

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Barbells and kittens
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It was pretty rare for me to have phone calls or messages from people wanting to meet up before covid, so I doubt that changes now. With the new job I started last year I have the permanent excuse of working long hours overnight for turning down any random requests to do anything.
 

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I relate to this a lot. The pandemic gave me a refuge to my insecurity of my lack of a social life. Always seeing others socially gather night in and night out, while I rarely have plans. I always try to not be home in the weekends despite having nothing to do, just to not look pathetic to housemates. Now everyone else too have no plans so I don't feel as alone. I no longer had to stress about that.

Not having to see family, go into work at all, and easily be able to turn down rare social plans were also nice. It has now gotten to the point where I don't even enjoy maintaining friendships anymore since I have nothing interesting about myself to keep them vested in me. So socializing for me became stressful for this reason. Although the lack of these interactions has also made me increasingly socially rusty. Met up with some people the past weekend and I was completely stoic and weird. For someone like me, once I am in this hole, it's very hard to get back out ever. Gym is what I miss the most. And I don't see myself comfortable enough to go to one for at least another year.

In all, pandemic or no pandemic hasn't been much of a difference for me aside of what I wrote in my first paragraph.
 

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I got my second shot of Moderna today, so no more masks are needed. Absolutely nothing will change for me. I don’t talk to anyone outside of family, so I never get invited to any events or anything at all.
 

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I don't think anything will change for me as well, and it's not like things will be going back to normal anytime soon. I generally don't care if people are socializing. If I don't want to join, I just ignore. Other people being miserable just makes me feel bad about staying in my own bubble, but if they're happy, I wouldn't feel bad about ignoring.

Mostly I liked having a break from work, and I never really got over that when work restarted last year. I still find myself wishing that I didn't have to work anymore, so lock downs are a positive thing for me, if not for all the other people struggling from insufficient income and people resigning thus effectively giving me more work.
 

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I ran into some mental issues during lockdown and spent some of it in both the regular and the mental hospital, most of 2020 in a bad way. My neighbours lived right on top of me in these tiny flats with paper thin walls and it sounded like it was hell for them too! Apparently not fun times for couples with easily-bored young children in tiny flats.

Thing is I really like solitude when it involves peace and quiet, but this was not peace and quiet. It was unpleasant at times, for reasons both real and surreal.

I had to write off the whole year basically, lost a good job I liked, went crazy, and eventually had to rebuild my confidence going outdoors from scratch after becoming barely able to leave my home. Personally I'm glad it's all over now (touch wood!) and I can try to get on with my life again.
 

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lockdown was paid time off work. I liked it. it's a little bit of reality sneaking into every day life. I wish people could act based on the truth in other ways too.

you're allowed to not go to weddings and funerals and you're allowed to not answer your phone even after lockdown 😁
 
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