[Shy extrovert]

I decided finally I really need to be more positive, not only for my own sake but others. I've been in a really deep state of depression and I'm trying to break out of it, so I thought I'd share a few things that worked and others can share too.

• Stopped listening to overly negative podcasts. I work in an office so I need background noise to get through it. I notice I was watching a lot of political content which is very often negative. Video essays about what's wrong with society too. I've switched to listening to music or listening to funny videos. It's definitely had an effect
• Actually doing things rather than just thinking about doing them. I started taking self defense classes, started a garden, started going to the gym, and started going to meetups throughout the past few years. It's given my life a bit more flavor, and I've become surprisingly passionate about growing vegetables and spices
• Trying to say positive things about people, rather than negative. I don't know why but for a while, I complained a lot about people. Mostly my coworkers and creepy men I had known. It was probably draining for those around me, and I regret it. At least I kind of tried to soften the blow by joking about these things rather than angrily ranting, but it still isn't a good look
• Trying to think two positive thoughts to every negative thought every time I begin to overthink things
• Making plans with my friends and family more often. No time to overthink if you are out having fun
• Trying to take things less seriously. This can be hard for someone who is depressed, its made me more sensitive to criticism. I remember sharing a meme that targeted my demographic and it was actually something I do. It wasn't flattering, but I was trying to desensitize myself to criticism
• Taking on the mannerisms of optimistic people I know
• Accepting that sometimes things in life can suck, and acknowledging that, but convincing myself that if a problem comes my way, I can deal with it. Something kind of similar to stoicism
• Having a more selfless mindset. Saying stuff like it's ok if someone doesn't pay me the exact amount of attention I pay them, as long as they aren't openly disrespecting me, then it's better to still do good to them instead of expecting it in return. This will also kill the victim mentality

 

[pillbugger]

Personal thing that I've started doing: Stop going logging in on reddit and reading all the black and white thinking. What a cesspool. I guess this extends to other popular social media sites as well. Good thing they added a way to blacklist subreddits, I think, if I ever start browsing it again.

And I guess avoiding black and white thinking extends to real life as well.

 

[Shy extrovert]

Personal thing that I've started doing: Stop going logging in on reddit and reading all the black and white thinking. What a cesspool. I guess this extends to other popular social media sites as well. Good thing they added a way to blacklist subreddits, I think, if I ever start browsing it again.

And I guess avoiding black and white thinking extends to real life as well.

True. Redditors will always jump to the conclusion of breaking off relationships with people the minute they do something to hurt you, which is a terrible idea. People hurt each other all the time, and l most of the time it's probably not on purpose. Generally I've noticed on instagram reels too they will make up relationship scenarios and try to find problems where there are none. For example a boyfriend "ignoring" his girlfriend all day by not texting her back. The comments are filled with negativity and people saying that's a red flag. But who knows, maybe the boyfriend was at work all day or out with his friends, maybe he had a quick moment to open the message and forgot to respond.

I knew a woman who was on reddit and quora all the time and I truly believe it polluted her thinking. She would start ending friendships over extremely minor disagreements. Best to avoid those sorts of environments

Ok so that was a weird tangent, but there is a lot of negativity in the online community that turns you on to a way of thinking that is extremely bad when maybe you wouldn't have even seen a problem with the situation before. Being offline more is also a great way to start feeling better, though maybe kind of hard when you don't have many friends. However, you can always replace it with something like drawing or knitting. Even playing a single player video game is a great alternative. And living in the moment too, appreciating the times you are happy and fully letting yourself be happy, even if you are usually depressed

 

[Skeletra]

One thing I find that has helped me is to take time to sort out my mind. Instead of trying to avoid thinking of certain problems and possible scenarios, I’ll sit down and figure if I’m maybe distorting my views or figure out what I’m really worried about.
As you put it, I accept that things suck sometimes instead of trying to run from it.

I’m also trying to give people more compliments and letting them know I appreciate them.

I’ve kind of just started using Reddit. So far I’m feeling less alone. I’m just on a few subreddits though. Haven’t seen much of the black and white thinking yet. But yeah, online communities often have a toxic trait to them. (The Norwegian forum I used for a while was hella toxic..)

 

[pillbugger]

True. Redditors will always jump to the conclusion of breaking off relationships with people the minute they do something to hurt you, which is a terrible idea. People hurt each other all the time, and l most of the time it's probably not on purpose. Generally I've noticed on instagram reels too they will make up relationship scenarios and try to find problems where there are none. For example a boyfriend "ignoring" his girlfriend all day by not texting her back. The comments are filled with negativity and people saying that's a red flag. But who knows, maybe the boyfriend was at work all day or out with his friends, maybe he had a quick moment to open the message and forgot to respond.

I knew a woman who was on reddit and quora all the time and I truly believe it polluted her thinking. She would start ending friendships over extremely minor disagreements. Best to avoid those sorts of environments

Ok so that was a weird tangent, but there is a lot of negativity in the online community that turns you on to a way of thinking that is extremely bad when maybe you wouldn't have even seen a problem with the situation before. Being offline more is also a great way to start feeling better, though maybe kind of hard when you don't have many friends. However, you can always replace it with something like drawing or knitting. Even playing a single player video game is a great alternative. And living in the moment too, appreciating the times you are happy and fully letting yourself be happy, even if you are usually depressed

There's always much more behind some reddit post, a whole story. And it's always important to remember that relationships are made up of compromises. A lot of people on reddit also seem to want to drag you down with them.

Right on, avoiding things that make you overthink is a blessing at times.