POLL: What is your initial feeling when someone tells you "you're too quiet!" ?
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Depending on who the person is, I feel like I'm disappointing them.
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They need to worry about their own life instead of focusing on me. Good, I hope that it does bother them. The more that they try to get me to talk, the quieter I will be. I would much rather be quiet than most of the people on this planet who can't shut the %#(@ up and have absolutely nothing worthwhile to say.
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154,235 Posts
more determined - but there should have been another option "You're too LOUD!" :lol
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718 Posts
I've been told I was a 'quiet achiever' and 'shy' all my life, from lots of different people including teacher's evaluations of me on school reports. I suppose I'm used to it and I also don't necessarily think it is a bad thing, makes me feel unique 
I think I'll always be a somewhat reserved person the thing that I want to improve is my confidence in myself, my self worth and to engage more in life. If I do all that and I'm still considered a 'quiet' person so be it.
I think I'll always be a somewhat reserved person the thing that I want to improve is my confidence in myself, my self worth and to engage more in life. If I do all that and I'm still considered a 'quiet' person so be it.
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I feel real low because they are pointing out a flaw that is hard for me to deal with in the first place. If I could just suck it up and put myself out there and be social in spite of my nerves I would have already done that, but it's easier said than done. So if someone points it out it just reminds me that I'm different than others and it's depressing.
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1,118 Posts
it depends on their tone.
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It depends on who they are and what their intentions are. I suppose someone could say that with the intention of trying to get you to speak more. Most people don't seem to be trying to help, though.
If they are someone I barely know and they just blurt this out, I feel that they should mind their own business. I've had people ask me if I was a mute before :twak Being raised with manners, I find it hard to understand how someone would not think that was a rude thing to ask.
My friend's sister used to tell people I was quiet. I found that hurtful, because I've made a lot of progress. I think she had good intentions, but I didn't like it.
If they are someone I barely know and they just blurt this out, I feel that they should mind their own business. I've had people ask me if I was a mute before :twak Being raised with manners, I find it hard to understand how someone would not think that was a rude thing to ask.
My friend's sister used to tell people I was quiet. I found that hurtful, because I've made a lot of progress. I think she had good intentions, but I didn't like it.
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2,527 Posts
I wouldn't say I'm offended, but there's an immediate rush of embarrassment and panic as I try to think of something to say. Then I feel like if I try and talk more people will think I'm weird for not talking before, but if I stay quiet people will still think I'm weird. I pretty much need to leave that situation asap.
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This, and depends on how familiar I am with them.
I'd say "annoyed" probably wins out for me. As in, 'excuse me for not filling every moment of silence with words, feel free to get away from me then' - that sort of thing.
Depends on how familiar I am with them.
Most people who know me, won't say it, though, it's usually random people.
I had someone say this to me about two weeks ago when she was gabbing away. She stopped to ask me why I was being so quiet. I thought to myself that even if I wanted to say something, I couldn't, so why even try? I just told her I didn't feel like talking, so she responded with, 'You're always this quiet, I bet.' Not sure what that meant...
If she knew me, and I actually liked her in some way, I wouldn't have been so quiet.
Most people who know me, won't say it, though, it's usually random people.
I had someone say this to me about two weeks ago when she was gabbing away. She stopped to ask me why I was being so quiet. I thought to myself that even if I wanted to say something, I couldn't, so why even try? I just told her I didn't feel like talking, so she responded with, 'You're always this quiet, I bet.' Not sure what that meant...
If she knew me, and I actually liked her in some way, I wouldn't have been so quiet.
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I'm quite used to it by people I don't know well. My friends don't think this of me anymore, I suppose.
Being quiet is not bad, in my opinion. I'd like to be the confident type of quiet, who just doesn't talk because he/she's ok with that and content of the moments he/she is living just as they are. Of course I'm not, that would be a far away goal to me.
But! When people use that phrase to make fun of me (or I think they do), I feel quite bad.
Being quiet is not bad, in my opinion. I'd like to be the confident type of quiet, who just doesn't talk because he/she's ok with that and content of the moments he/she is living just as they are. Of course I'm not, that would be a far away goal to me.
But! When people use that phrase to make fun of me (or I think they do), I feel quite bad.
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1,786 Posts
^seconded
I voted for the first option, but my real respone would be to think "P*** off, I'm not too quiet, why should I be all loud and talky?"
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