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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm having a problem with my social anxiety that I've realized I need help with.

My main coping technique is by arrogance, I've found this to be a nearly flawless method of coping with my anxiety, But I've recently found a flaw. I'm a freshman in highschool and Im now 'talking' to a junior who is very attractive and very popular in my school. I have no problem attracting her, I just simply cant speak to her because I melt down. My problem is that since I've finally met my match, I cant find any flaws to bring her down to below me in order to talk to her. This is most definatly not a troll of any sort, I need help coping with this girl in order to date her. I cant simply walk away from her either, Because dating her would shine a whole new light on me in the upperclassmen, Not to mention this would be a very successful tactical move in terms of the spread of my Social engineering.

How do you guys cope with your anxiety when talking to very attractive girls that you keep telling yourself is out of your league?

Any feedback is highly appreciated, Just try to keep it constructive, Please.
 

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Firstly, make sure you are attracted to her for beyond her looks and popularity.

But I understand that it could be very intimidating talking to an attractive person. Maybe try and imagine her as just another girl in school. If you are constantly aware of her popularity when talking to her then that's going to make you nervous. Ask her questions about herself. Like what's your favorite subject, what are your hobbies. Ask questions that can lead into you guys finding things that you have in common. And if she really seems to be interested in you and you're interested in her try doing something that makes her feel special. Girls really like that. Like offering to help carry her books to class. Complimenting her. F.Y.I I probably wouldn't do these things if she didn't seem interested because sometimes girls may take it as if you're trying to hard, but that also depends on the situation and the person. That's the best I can think of since I have problems talking to attractive people too.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Firstly, make sure you are attracted to her for beyond her looks and popularity.

But I understand that it could be very intimidating talking to an attractive person. Maybe try and imagine her as just another girl in school. If you are constantly aware of her popularity when talking to her then that's going to make you nervous. Ask her questions about herself. Like what's your favorite subject, what are your hobbies. Ask questions that can lead into you guys finding things that you have in common. And if she really seems to be interested in you and you're interested in her try doing something that makes her feel special. Girls really like that. Like offering to help carry her books to class. Complimenting her. F.Y.I I probably wouldn't do these things if she didn't seem interested because sometimes girls may take it as if you're trying to hard, but that also depends on the situation and the person. That's the best I can think of since I have problems talking to attractive people too.
Thank you for feedback, I'll have to try that.
 
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