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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am a 20 year old, college student. I haven't really dated. In fact, I have only dated one girl, which we did for a few months. We met online, but she was different, cuz we took so long to meet and by the time we did, we knew each other somewhat well. She left to study abroad and we are gonna continue seeing each other after, but I thought I might as well get some experience while she's away (we're not in a relationship, it's not cheating) because there are no guarantees.

So I signed up for OKCupid, chatted with a cute girl, and now we have plans for a date later this week. She asked me what we should do, and I am stumped. It gets me really anxious because I don't know what to do!!

It just gets complicated because generally, the girls I would ask out on the site are fellow college students in the same big city. But most of them would not have a car (neither do I) and rely on the train to get around, so they are generally off at different stops. Which makes it a little different for meeting up.

We are under the drinking age, so "drinks" is not an option. I suppose I get nervous about what to do, like is dinner too much on a first date? Or just coffee? That seems so boring. It's cold out too, so any outdoor activity is mostly meh. And then the whole where to meet is awkward, like do I take the train to her area (where I don't know what's around)? It feels weird asking for her to meet by me.

Ugh, I guess I really struggle with picking dates to do, which I know is a turn-off for women. Any ideas?
 

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Go for an event that you would have done anyway. Say that you need a new pair of jeans, ask her if she's good with style and can help you out with finding a good pair. If you walk around looking for jeans silence won't feel as awkward etc
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Well, here's the deal. I have a date Thursday with someone I met online. I am going to her college campus area, because I felt that would be more comfortable with her. We simply go to different colleges in a large city, so we would both have to take public transit to reach each other.

I don't really know of many places in the area by her. It's full of restaurants, and to be honest, a restaurant is not my ideal first date for someone I met online....would prefer coffee. But there are no coffee places around her, except one, but that is a sandwich place too, so I would feel awkward about going to a cafe of sandwiches and just getting something else. Or maybe I'm overthinking it. It's just that food is tough for me because I must be gluten free.

Either way, there is a froyo place, and always that cafe as an option. Should be a little chilly, but maybe a walk around the area. Any date ideas? I'm just clueless about the area and it's our first ever meetup so it makes me nervous.
 

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The first meetup as far as I am concerned, put as little thought into where to go and what to do as possible... just coffee shop or go for a walk, anything past that on a first date is too much, you want to be able to talk... the 2nd 3rd or 4th date is another story, and you will have to come up with a few ideas... movies on the first date is a bad idea cause you can't talk or get to know them... dinner is also too much for a first date... just keep it simple.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
The first meetup as far as I am concerned, put as little thought into where to go and what to do as possible... just coffee shop or go for a walk, anything past that on a first date is too much, you want to be able to talk... the 2nd 3rd or 4th date is another story, and you will have to come up with a few ideas... movies on the first date is a bad idea cause you can't talk or get to know them... dinner is also too much for a first date... just keep it simple.
Yeah, I think that's the best, especially for online.

Either way, we went to a coffee shop and I got a second date sometime next week. Ugh, planning sucks, but I figure I gotta force myself to do it anyway. Almost cancelled the other one but luckily I decided against it.
 

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Wait you already met her? If she looks the least bit interested, ALWAYS try to kiss on the first date, if the time/place is right... the worst she can do is turn away... 2nd date max...

How far away is this girl? Over an hour away is kinda the limit as far as long-distance relationships... I once met a girl and went to her college campus.... I am white and she is black, she was the R.A. in her dorm, every 5 minutes, a new black guy came in to visit, none looked too pleased I was in there... I begged to sleep with her for like over an hour... sleazy but I was laying in bed with her, and it is just so damn tempting... I just slept in her bed with her, she I think was half-naked and refused to even kiss me... my argument was "I travelled like an hour and a half or two hours to get here" and "I am here already" just tried every trick in the book nothing worked... I never saw her again...

Being a guy sucks, like nothing romantic about just begging/badgering a girl... I doubt I would do that again but at the time I was just so desperate...

Anyway college campuses are intimidating as hell if you have S.A. especially going to another one and meeting a girl you never met.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Wait you already met her? If she looks the least bit interested, ALWAYS try to kiss on the first date, if the time/place is right... the worst she can do is turn away... 2nd date max...

How far away is this girl? Over an hour away is kinda the limit as far as long-distance relationships... I once met a girl and went to her college campus.... I am white and she is black, she was the R.A. in her dorm, every 5 minutes, a new black guy came in to visit, none looked too pleased I was in there... I begged to sleep with her for like over an hour... sleazy but I was laying in bed with her, and it is just so damn tempting... I just slept in her bed with her, she I think was half-naked and refused to even kiss me... my argument was "I travelled like an hour and a half or two hours to get here" and "I am here already" just tried every trick in the book nothing worked... I never saw her again...

Being a guy sucks, like nothing romantic about just begging/badgering a girl... I doubt I would do that again but at the time I was just so desperate...

Anyway college campuses are intimidating as hell if you have S.A. especially going to another one and meeting a girl you never met.
Well we didn't kiss. I actually ha to leave by a certain time and I walked her back and our hug was super quick. She seemed very nervous though. It's only 20 minutes away, and I'm not really going for anything serious with her. Definitely plan on making a move next date, but this was just for coffee and seeing if we gelled. Pretty sure I was her first online date.
 

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Whatever you do, don't call/text/E-mail for at least 3 days after seeing her... or even possibly longer, last thing you want to do is scare her off.
 
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