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Tell your boss that you have a disability. Also let him know that you expect to be not made fun of for your disability or else you will have to contact HR. Making fun of anyone who has any condition simply isn't acceptable in the professional workplace and it doesn't come without consequences.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Tell your boss that you have a disability. Also let him know that you expect to be not made fun of for your disability or else you will have to contact HR. Making fun of anyone who has any condition simply isn't acceptable in the professional workplace and it doesn't come without consequences.
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Well, as you said, he knows already that you are shy and he picks on you because it bothers you and embarrasses you. How is that right? Say he has a problem with overeating and you make fun of him around the office for that...or he uses a cane and you mock him. People make fun of others every day in the workplace, but it happens more often than it should because people don't stand up for themselves.

If you would prefer a more subtle method, then go for it. Call that "Plan A" and mine is "Plan B." If Plan A doesn't get the results you want then consider using Plan B. Best of luck.
 

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I've learned to force myself to sit closer to the group when it comes to meetings, for the same reasons you describe. Having my very large personal space "bubble" violated for a while actually is easier to handle than the embarrassment of having it brought to everyone's attention when I try to hide. Of course, my anxiety levels are heightened and I have trouble focusing on what's being discussed, but I figure that's the trade-off for not standing out. Definitely sucks.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Well, as you said, he knows already that you are shy and he picks on you because it bothers you and embarrasses you. How is that right? Say he has a problem with overeating and you make fun of him around the office for that...or he uses a cane and you mock him. People make fun of others every day in the workplace, but it happens more often than it should because people don't stand up for themselves.

If you would prefer a more subtle method, then go for it. Call that "Plan A" and mine is "Plan B." If Plan A doesn't get the results you want then consider using Plan B. Best of luck.
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No, youre not too sensitive. I agree with RockIt. You should have a serious conversation with this 12 year old child(he's not acting 50, thats for sure) and let him know that it bothers you and you'd appreciate if if he would stop. Once you let him know how you feel, if he does it again, then that just gives you more ammunition to use against him when you plead your case to someone in HR...or in higher authority anyway.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
No, youre not too sensitive. I agree with RockIt. You should have a serious conversation with this 12 year old child(he's not acting 50, thats for sure) and let him know that it bothers you and you'd appreciate if if he would stop. Once you let him know how you feel, if he does it again, then that just gives you more ammunition to use against him when you plead your case to someone in HR...or in higher authority anyway.
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It doesnt matter what he thinks. The fact is that the things he says to you are making you uncomfortable. Period. If he says "well, I dont think its so bad" or whatever...He's on the other side of the stick so of course he won't see things the same way you do.
If he wants to pretend to be oblivious, give him examples...word for word.

All you can do here is to let him know that you dont like it. How is he suppose to know if you dont tell him? After you let him know, the ball is in his court and you can take action based on his reaction.

He keeps being a douchebag=go above his head
He stops being a douchebag=problem solved

Be calm and professional when confronting someone like this,and you may be suprised how reasonable they can be. You catch more flies with honey, than vinegar.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
It doesnt matter what he thinks. The fact is that the things he says to you are making you uncomfortable. Period. If he says "well, I dont think its so bad" or whatever...He's on the other side of the stick so of course he won't see things the same way you do.

All you can do here is to let him know that you dont like it. How is he suppose to know if you dont tell him? After you let him know, the ball is in his court and you can take action based on his reaction.

He keeps being a douchebag=go above his head
He stops being a douchebag=problem solved

Be calm and professional when confronting someone like this,and you may be suprised how reasonable they can be. You catch more flies with honey, than vinegar.
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There ya go. That sounds like a good opportunity to soften the blow to him. If you had a meeting about just the teasing, he might take that more personally and that might cause him to get defensive.

When you two talk about work performance...that sounds like a good opportunity to bring it up. This is obviously causing problems, and it's not productive to have tension between those who are working together to accomplish a task.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
There ya go. That sounds like a good opportunity to soften the blow to him. If you had a meeting about just the teasing, he might take that more personally and that might cause him to get defensive.

When you two talk about work performance...that sounds like a good opportunity to bring it up. This is obviously causing problems, and it's not productive to have tension between those who are working together to accomplish a task.
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You sound like you will make the right decision. After all, you know the situation better than any of us. We are mearly offering advice based upon what you tell us. Good luck to you! :yes
 

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Well you already implanted unwanted attention towards yourself, only thing left to do is change that. I know you have SA but its also good that you are working.

Thats a big step already... just make changes like on your next meeting just sit with the group.

Or just laugh about that since, they already know thats your favorite spot anyways.
 

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Do I need to sit at the table with the others in the next office meeting, or continue like I've been doing for years (getting a chair and sitting to the side)? If I sit at the table next time, they'll probably make fun of THAT ("What's wrong, couldn't find your favorite chair to sit in the corner?").
I think you should sit at the table. A good way to make this transition would be to bring pen/paper or a bottled water/coffee, etc...something you need the table for. If they say something, then it's time you have a discussion with your boss. Although, I feel that you should have had a discussion with your boss already, but I know that's hard. And, yes, document everything as odd_one_out suggests.
 
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