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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi. Last time I submitted a post about how people thought I was flirting because I had a problem with staring. I've tried to ignore it, I've tried to pretend like nothing and I've tried to not looking down as quickly in order to not make it seem suspicious.

I wondered if it could be OCD-staring, but people think I'm in love with them anyway even when I just look in their direction. My psychologist says it's just in my head. I know that she believes that I believe it, but she doesn't believe that people think I'm in love with them.

A while ago, the girl who thought I was in love with her addressed this. She said I was wrong and denied everything. I asked her why she avoided me and about other people involved. But she said that they probably didn't think so, and said it maybe was because of my former classmates who did. But I didn't ask her about her girlfriend being mean to me. She didn't do anything serious, but it was things like grabbing a chair I was obviously going to get, almost kicking my backpack and every-time I went to a classroom she would quickly go inside before me. I even caught her staring at me once. When I think I about I probably should have told her about that too.

This may sound like things I should be able to ignore, but it gets so frustrating when almost every boy and couple you meet think you're a ***** without you understanding why. It also gets frustrating after several years.

Almost everyday when I'm outside, when I try to look up when there's a couple nearby or in sight, the girl either kiss, hug or flirt while staring at me with this evil smile, to prove me a point, that this boy isn't mine. I've noticed that I don't even need eye-contact with them for them to believe it, but looking towards their direction is enough. The solution would be to not look towards their direction, but there are always someone where I need to look.

I'm also worrying about whats going to happen if I get a job and if I could get fired for it. I don't even talk to boys, but people still think I'm in love with them.

I guess that I'm asking why people still think I'm in love with them, and if there are someone who have any suggestions to what I should do now. Sorry if this was too long.
 

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Hello, I have this problem too. It happens whenever I go outside. It's something to do with the eyes. That's what I've figured out. For some reason, no matter where I look, if someone is in front of me or beside me, they'll think I'm looking at them. I have to cover my eyes somehow in order for the person near me to not act awkward or stare at me.

Even around couples, as you said, "when I try to look up when there's a couple nearby or in sight, the girl either kiss, hug or flirt while staring at me with this evil smile, to prove me a point, that this boy isn't mine." This is so especially true. It happened to me the other day.

I think we share some kind of rare condition. I don't know how to solve it, or how to talk to anyone about it. I've tried telling my parents, but they just acted awkward for months afterwards, avoiding eye contact with me. It was the worst thing.

I feel hopeless living with this. I can't go outside. I can't be around people. I've dropped out of school because sitting in a classroom full of people thinking you're looking at them everyday is just impossible to endure. I couldn't take it. I feel like I have no future. I can't get a job, everyone will think I'm staring at them. I can't have friends, they'll think I'm staring at them. I can't have a partner, I can't have kids, no family.. All because they'll think I'm staring at the all the time. I can't LIVE.

I don't know what to do. I've tried to find other people who have this condition and found some people who are going through the same thing. We are not alone. That's one of the FEW positives to having this condition. (it's mostly a downright curse) At least we're not alone.

I want to find a solution to this. Please help me. I try contacting the people I've found, but they never reply. So please, reply?

Thanks.
 

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Hi all

I used to feel just the same before... I didn't want to stare but couldn't help. I think deep down its because of my SA believing that I seek love from outside (find someone who may admire me and felt so empty afterwards) or need to see people because I think they may talk behind me or a bit envious when finding that they are in love... however, I would say all of these are gone from me completely and I felt like I wanna help as much people as I could since I know how tormenting it is. This would take practice and let's promise me that you can commit to that and be patient enough to do it on a daily basis and you will find amazing results after you are awaken from your nightmare life. Here are some tips from me...
First, I'd like you to start practice mindfulness anytime anywhere as long as you remember. I want you to focus on your body movement like while you are lying to sleep you just think that I'm sleeping, or while you're walking, seeing TV or browsing the Internet, you just see yourself as another person and think I'm walking, watching TV, etc. You may think this is silly but it's a good start as I tried it before and it works! (But you just dont think that it will work in a couple of days but keep doing and be patient for amazing result!). Then you just become more aware of your thoughts like when you think I'm such a dumb or shy or whatever your mind tells you that you are, you just think that ok I'm thinking this and let go. Do this as often as you can. It sounds strange and you may wonder how it could help but I would say this is the first step because when you aware more of your thoughts, you will have more consciousness and at the next level when you are expertise at this, you will understand that it's the old unhelpful pattern that made you stuck like a vicious circle that get you out of nowhere and you can really let it go. It's really important that you just acknowledge them as they are and let go. If it creates more bad thoughts, then you just acknowledge the new thought. It's hard for me at first coz I think I was such a bad person by thinking so negatively or criticizing people or myself so much but after you practice this for a while, you can realize that most of them are not true and not believing it anymore. Then, you will be free from your own thoughts (which I wanna remind you that your thoughts are not yours. It's just the thoughts which belong to no one and once you can detach it from yourself, you will be free as I do and realized that what they are telling you are mostly not true.)
I wish you best of lucks practicing this and you can drop me anything if you need my further suggestions.


Sent from my SM-N9005 using Tapatalk
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Hi all

I used to feel just the same before... I didn't want to stare but couldn't help. I think deep down its because of my SA believing that I seek love from outside (find someone who may admire me and felt so empty afterwards) or need to see people because I think they may talk behind me or a bit envious when finding that they are in love... however, I would say all of these are gone from me completely and I felt like I wanna help as much people as I could since I know how tormenting it is. This would take practice and let's promise me that you can commit to that and be patient enough to do it on a daily basis and you will find amazing results after you are awaken from your nightmare life. Here are some tips from me...
First, I'd like you to start practice mindfulness anytime anywhere as long as you remember. I want you to focus on your body movement like while you are lying to sleep you just think that I'm sleeping, or while you're walking, seeing TV or browsing the Internet, you just see yourself as another person and think I'm walking, watching TV, etc. You may think this is silly but it's a good start as I tried it before and it works! (But you just dont think that it will work in a couple of days but keep doing and be patient for amazing result!). Then you just become more aware of your thoughts like when you think I'm such a dumb or shy or whatever your mind tells you that you are, you just think that ok I'm thinking this and let go. Do this as often as you can. It sounds strange and you may wonder how it could help but I would say this is the first step because when you aware more of your thoughts, you will have more consciousness and at the next level when you are expertise at this, you will understand that it's the old unhelpful pattern that made you stuck like a vicious circle that get you out of nowhere and you can really let it go. It's really important that you just acknowledge them as they are and let go. If it creates more bad thoughts, then you just acknowledge the new thought. It's hard for me at first coz I think I was such a bad person by thinking so negatively or criticizing people or myself so much but after you practice this for a while, you can realize that most of them are not true and not believing it anymore. Then, you will be free from your own thoughts (which I wanna remind you that your thoughts are not yours. It's just the thoughts which belong to no one and once you can detach it from yourself, you will be free as I do and realized that what they are telling you are mostly not true.)
I wish you best of lucks practicing this and you can drop me anything if you need my further suggestions.

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Tapatalk
Thank you incredibly much! Sorry I did not respond I did not think anyone would answer. I'm going to try it at once. I really appreciate it. There is so much I want to say, but I don't know how, but I'm really grateful!
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Hello, I have this problem too. It happens whenever I go outside. It's something to do with the eyes. That's what I've figured out. For some reason, no matter where I look, if someone is in front of me or beside me, they'll think I'm looking at them. I have to cover my eyes somehow in order for the person near me to not act awkward or stare at me.

Even around couples, as you said, "when I try to look up when there's a couple nearby or in sight, the girl either kiss, hug or flirt while staring at me with this evil smile, to prove me a point, that this boy isn't mine." This is so especially true. It happened to me the other day.

I think we share some kind of rare condition. I don't know how to solve it, or how to talk to anyone about it. I've tried telling my parents, but they just acted awkward for months afterwards, avoiding eye contact with me. It was the worst thing.

I feel hopeless living with this. I can't go outside. I can't be around people. I've dropped out of school because sitting in a classroom full of people thinking you're looking at them everyday is just impossible to endure. I couldn't take it. I feel like I have no future. I can't get a job, everyone will think I'm staring at them. I can't have friends, they'll think I'm staring at them. I can't have a partner, I can't have kids, no family.. All because they'll think I'm staring at the all the time. I can't LIVE.

I don't know what to do. I've tried to find other people who have this condition and found some people who are going through the same thing. We are not alone. That's one of the FEW positives to having this condition. (it's mostly a downright curse) At least we're not alone.

I want to find a solution to this. Please help me. I try contacting the people I've found, but they never reply. So please, reply?

Thanks.
I'm very sorry I didn't respond. I did not think anyone would answer, so I didn't check it as often. I've sent you a private message, hope you read it.
 

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hi, I am having this problem too im glad to know i am not alone. Your response was posted back in 2016 and I wanted to ask how you are doing now? Did this issue go away? If so how? I am currently going through the same problem and its been the absolute worse to the point im almost suicidal. I am fine so do not worry but I feel so trapped.
 

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Hello, I have this problem too. It happens whenever I go outside. It's something to do with the eyes. That's what I've figured out. For some reason, no matter where I look, if someone is in front of me or beside me, they'll think I'm looking at them. I have to cover my eyes somehow in order for the person near me to not act awkward or stare at me.

Even around couples, as you said, "when I try to look up when there's a couple nearby or in sight, the girl either kiss, hug or flirt while staring at me with this evil smile, to prove me a point, that this boy isn't mine." This is so especially true. It happened to me the other day.

I think we share some kind of rare condition. I don't know how to solve it, or how to talk to anyone about it. I've tried telling my parents, but they just acted awkward for months afterwards, avoiding eye contact with me. It was the worst thing.

I feel hopeless living with this. I can't go outside. I can't be around people. I've dropped out of school because sitting in a classroom full of people thinking you're looking at them everyday is just impossible to endure. I couldn't take it. I feel like I have no future. I can't get a job, everyone will think I'm staring at them. I can't have friends, they'll think I'm staring at them. I can't have a partner, I can't have kids, no family.. All because they'll think I'm staring at the all the time. I can't LIVE.

I don't know what to do. I've tried to find other people who have this condition and found some people who are going through the same thing. We are not alone. That's one of the FEW positives to having this condition. (it's mostly a downright curse) At least we're not alone.

I want to find a solution to this. Please help me. I try contacting the people I've found, but they never reply. So please, reply?

Thanks.
hi, I am having this problem too im glad to know i am not alone. Your response was posted back in 2016 and I wanted to ask how you are doing now? Did this issue go away? If so how? I am currently going through the same problem and its been the absolute worse to the point im almost suicidal. I am fine so do not worry but I feel so trapped.
 

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hi, I am having this problem too im glad to know i am not alone. Your response was posted back in 2016 and I wanted to ask how you are doing now? Did this issue go away? If so how? I am currently going through the same problem and its been the absolute worse to the point im almost suicidal. I am fine so do not worry but I feel so trapped.
Yes I have the same Problem FINALLY someone gets it. This is killing me slowly and everyone thinks i’m soooo weird. Its basically when your looking somewhere but your so focused where your NOT looking you start staring out the corner of your eye. So you have to practice looking somewhere and truly looking at it and thinking about it. I still practice every day but it has torn apart my life in the past I know EXACLTY what your talking about.
 

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Yes I have the same Problem FINALLY someone gets it. This is killing me slowly and everyone thinks i’m soooo weird. Its basically when your looking somewhere but your so focused where your NOT looking you start staring out the corner of your eye. So you have to practice looking somewhere and truly looking at it and thinking about it. I still practice every day but it has torn apart my life in the past I know EXACLTY what your talking about.
Omggg it is so reliving that someone else is facinf this problem, i thought I completely alone. And thank youu!! I will practice that. But one question has the fact that people think you wre staring at them stopped. Like i feel like even if i practice that people will still think im staring at them. So i am confused do you still have this problem or do people still think you are staring them til this day. Idk if its a conditon so i can get help form a doctor bc i go to school everyday im only 16, and like i dont think i can do this anymore you know? Like im losing my friends, teachers think im weird, even my family.
 

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Omggg it is so reliving that someone else is facinf this problem, i thought I completely alone. And thank youu!! I will practice that. But one question has the fact that people think you wre staring at them stopped. Like i feel like even if i practice that people will still think im staring at them. So i am confused do you still have this problem or do people still think you are staring them til this day. Idk if its a conditon so i can get help form a doctor bc i go to school everyday im only 16, and like i dont think i can do this anymore you know? Like im losing my friends, teachers think im weird, even my family.
Pls answer😭
 

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Yes I have the same Problem FINALLY someone gets it. This is killing me slowly and everyone thinks i’m soooo weird. Its basically when your looking somewhere but your so focused where your NOT looking you start staring out the corner of your eye. So you have to practice looking somewhere and truly looking at it and thinking about it. I still practice every day but it has torn apart my life in the past I know EXACLTY what your talking about.
Pls answer😭
 

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Omggg it is so reliving that someone else is facinf this problem, i thought I completely alone. And thank youu!! I will practice that. But one question has the fact that people think you wre staring at them stopped. Like i feel like even if i practice that people will still think im staring at them. So i am confused do you still have this problem or do people still think you are staring them til this day. Idk if its a conditon so i can get help form a doctor bc i go to school everyday im only 16, and like i dont think i can do this anymore you know? Like im losing my friends, teachers think im weird, even my family.
Hey, I also am working on this. I'm not sure how official the term is but I think what we have is called "peripheral vision OCD", there's a reddit post of someone who says they overcame it. So there's hope for us!
 

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Can anyone elaborate on the cues other people give that tell you they think you are staring at them? Like, what are the signs/evidence? I think people are thinking this about me too and I hate it cause I couldn’t give a single fk about any of them 🤣 I have been jumped and through other trauma so my hyper-alertness is probably being perceived as staring and I really hate that. Like, that these people think I give af or would intentionally rest my eyes on their ugliness. It makes me feel angry and then worry about my intermenttent explosive issues and then just feel like I can’t be in the population. Feels not good. It does help that this all sounds so silly after you type it out haha
 

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Can anyone elaborate on the cues other people give that tell you they think you are staring at them? Like, what are the signs/evidence? I think people are thinking this about me too and I hate it cause I couldn’t give a single fk about any of them 🤣 I have been jumped and through other trauma so my hyper-alertness is probably being perceived as staring and I really hate that. Like, that these people think I give af or would intentionally rest my eyes on their ugliness. It makes me feel angry and then worry about my intermenttent explosive issues and then just feel like I can’t be in the population. Feels not good. It does help that this all sounds so silly after you type it out haha
People turn back and look at you or they stare at you with an annoyed face for a few seconds. They also stare at you until you stop. Or if they tell someone.
 

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hi, I am having this problem too im glad to know i am not alone. Your response was posted back in 2016 and I wanted to ask how you are doing now? Did this issue go away? If so how? I am currently going through the same problem and its been the absolute worse to the point im almost suicidal. I am fine so do not worry but I feel so trapped.
I’m around the same age as you and I have the same problem, but it’s also to private parts sometimes. I suggest you tell your counselor to tell your teachers that you have this problem. I did that and my teachers are understanding. My advice is to not cover your face and stop thinking about it and eventually it will go away. I went to the eye doctor because I thought it was an eye problem and she said it was a cognitive problem. I hope ur ok :)
 

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I’m so sorry yes My account was hacked or something i couldn’t log on
But sorry anyway yes please ask any questions I have delt with this stupid *ing anxiety for 10 years and IM SO SICK OF THIS * I LOST EVERYONE AND EVERYBODY IN MY LIFE
Im really really sorry its been that long you have dealt with that i wonder wtf it is. I try to understand i have gone to the eye doctor multiple times and they have said my eyes are fine and that it is probably mental but i swear it isnt like i havent delt with huge mental problems besides anxiety and depression and i have gone all my lfie without this problem this occurred in the beginning in the pandemic when i felt like my eyes felt kind of bigger but physically they stayed the same and people started getting freaked out by me like they would stop and check to see if i am staring wt them when im clearly on my phone you know? Like am I schizophrenic? Is it all in mt head idk bc what could it be? Are our eyes too big like wtf ? And what keeps u here wanting to love still bc i am exhausted every day is hell. Im literallt junior in high school going to a nice school i had a group of friends and now i avoid them all so i dont make tjem uncomforyable with my eyes. Ive lost everything and i will never know what i have or how to fix it. Someone on here said its ocd peripheral vision but i dont think i have that. I dont have an issue with feeling like i have to stare at something or someone. Thats the thing I geniunely am not looking at someone and if i am sitting behind them in class or someome is sitting in front of me or facing me it appears as if i am looking at them. How is that possible if i am looking down at my test paper or looking at the board or my phone why does it appear as if i am staring at them is what i dont get ?? Like is this real i cant tell if i am dreaming at this point or if this is reality bc it doesnt make sense
 

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Wow, I really thought I was the only one experiencing this. Glad to know that I’m not alone in the world.

For me, this behaviour usually flares up when I’m at work or if I’m out at a restaurant or somewhere seated usually. People that are in my visual field behind an individual that I’m taking to feel’s like I’m looking at them even when I personally feel like I’m not. This also seems to happen with people that are sitting right beside me.
I’ve experienced this for a few years now and I feel like I get stuck in a loop of paranoia where you feel like someone else feels like you’re looking at them, so you give them a side eye, and that’s when it triggers a chain reaction of awkwardness and people realise that you’re actually looking at them even though that’s what you were trying to avoid in the first place.
These actions feel subconscious, I think it’s almost like we’re in a hyper alert state and our primal instincts are kicking in making us look for danger 24/7.

My suggestion would be to speak to a GP in the first instance. Sertraline or an another SSRI could alleviate some of the symptoms. I’m still working on it, but after starting the meds I’m starting to notice a change for the better.

It’ll take a lot of effort, but I think we can all get through this
 

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Hello, I have this problem too. It happens whenever I go outside. It's something to do with the eyes. That's what I've figured out. For some reason, no matter where I look, if someone is in front of me or beside me, they'll think I'm looking at them. I have to cover my eyes somehow in order for the person near me to not act awkward or stare at me.

Even around couples, as you said, "when I try to look up when there's a couple nearby or in sight, the girl either kiss, hug or flirt while staring at me with this evil smile, to prove me a point, that this boy isn't mine." This is so especially true. It happened to me the other day.

I think we share some kind of rare condition. I don't know how to solve it, or how to talk to anyone about it. I've tried telling my parents, but they just acted awkward for months afterwards, avoiding eye contact with me. It was the worst thing.

I feel hopeless living with this. I can't go outside. I can't be around people. I've dropped out of school because sitting in a classroom full of people thinking you're looking at them everyday is just impossible to endure. I couldn't take it. I feel like I have no future. I can't get a job, everyone will think I'm staring at them. I can't have friends, they'll think I'm staring at them. I can't have a partner, I can't have kids, no family.. All because they'll think I'm staring at the all the time. I can't LIVE.

I don't know what to do. I've tried to find other people who have this condition and found some people who are going through the same thing. We are not alone. That's one of the FEW positives to having this condition. (it's mostly a downright curse) At least we're not alone.

I want to find a solution to this. Please help me. I try contacting the people I've found, but they never reply. So please, reply?

Thanks.
I really hope you see this and yes I very much relate to this. although this was uploaded in 2016, it’s the year 2022 and I’m currently in high school (10th), I am indeed suffering with this eye problem and I hate being around people, around my own family, having a boyfriend, etc etc, the list goes on. I just want to know how life is going for you and if you ever found a cure and how did you manage to go on with life suffering from this rare condition
 
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