Social Anxiety Support Forum banner

1 - 19 of 19 Posts

·
Dubstepper
Joined
·
339 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Have you ever experienced a job where someone who is very social becomes popular at work, does very little work, and somehow bosses treat them like they're doing just as much as work as everyone else, if not more?

I can think of one job where the boss liked talking to one employee, always gave them super easy jobs and just talked to the employee while the employee did the job extremely slowly.. everyone else was working hard. The boss treated that employee very well, as if they're one of the hardest workers there. The same boss criticizes the quieter workers more often as if they're just screwing around or being lazy.
 

·
Carpe Diem
Joined
·
145 Posts
It's ironic because you would think that the quieter ones would often be the ones to go by unnoticed, but it turns out that they are often the ones getting all the unwanted attention.
 

·
Chlorine and Wine
Joined
·
12,104 Posts
When I was working temporary, I was the one asked to go home when you had these loud-mouths who didn't work half as hard as me. I've seen the bias so well. The agency forgets me but will no doubt offer work to the lazy bum sleeping in the car. You have to get on an employer's case just to get a job. It's ridiculous, the hoops we have to jump through.
 

·
We all deserve something.
Joined
·
1,786 Posts
Yep, I've noticed that one of my coworkers befriended all the managers so she pretty much half asses everything and can get away with it fine.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,372 Posts
this is blatant discrimination against the introverted!!

(i'd say we should all go home and mull this over)..

:lol

Yep, every one is right in their posts. the ones that can unashamedly brown nose, chat people up, and of course, are popular - are the ones that are far more successful..

i hate seeing it.. i don't like believing it.. but it sure as s*** is "real" to me.
 

·
Dubstepper
Joined
·
339 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
this is blatant discrimination against the introverted!!
....
i hate seeing it.. i don't like believing it.. but it sure as s*** is "real" to me.
Sometimes I think it's just in my head, but then I think back to those 'popular' workers who got away with taking an hour to do a task that takes 10 minutes.

Or one job I had fixing computers where an extremely tall/confident guy was hired for the same job, but he had no prior experience or education with computers. I basically trained him so I knew he didn't know s*** about computers. His previous job was construction worker..

Or the department head for an IT department I worked for at an internship, was very social and a people person, but knew VERY little about technology..

Or the department head for IT at my college was about the same person, except not friendly and more of a manipulator who acts fake friendly. Knew very little about technology

When I'm applying for IT jobs, they are very strict about what I do and do not know/what I'm qualified for - I've still gotten hired for all of them, but one (someone much older and more experienced applied too), but it makes me wonder how these people got any IT job..
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
64 Posts
In my case, I have been seen as a quite person but very independent and a strong worker. So whenever there was a high difficulty task they always gave it to me. And at meetings, they would always brag about how great of a job I'm doing. I think both sides should learn a little something from each other.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
89 Posts
You know what's really sad? I read an article once that said a study was done and they found that bosses are more likely to hire people who 1) they want to be friends with and/or 2) they are physically attracted to. Over whether they are good workers or not. People are pathetic! and I'm completely screwed lol
 

·
Dubstepper
Joined
·
339 Posts
Discussion Starter · #11 ·
You know what's really sad? I read an article once that said a study was done and they found that bosses are more likely to hire people who 1) they want to be friends with and/or 2) they are physically attracted to. Over whether they are good workers or not. People are pathetic! and I'm completely screwed lol
Yeah I've seen plenty of those studies, even some from legitimate sources, which is kind of a slap in the face to any effort I put out.
 

·
Searching...
Joined
·
6,335 Posts
Have you ever experienced a job where someone who is very social becomes popular at work, does very little work, and somehow bosses treat them like they're doing just as much as work as everyone else, if not more?

I can think of one job where the boss liked talking to one employee, always gave them super easy jobs and just talked to the employee while the employee did the job extremely slowly.. everyone else was working hard. The boss treated that employee very well, as if they're one of the hardest workers there. The same boss criticizes the quieter workers more often as if they're just screwing around or being lazy.
Yes, yes, and yes. I literally feel like a slave, many of my coworkers do, and the social, good looking few are treated much better with less work. Don't know for certain if they receive higher raises, yet I'd rather not think about that.

Are the quiet workers gonna speak up about it?--No. Most of them just take it. Eventually some leave for new jobs or just simply quit. It's imperative to take a stand, yet in this economy where anyone can be replaced, seems quite risky. My mother constantly tells me if I'm so miserable I should just quit, then just simply use my savings to attend college or something, perhaps find a less stressful job. I... don't know what I want. Part of me is proud for putting up with this stress, another part feels trapped like I have no choice. I need this job to practice socializing. But I never feel normal and I'm constantly on the verge of a nervous breakdown lately. Please Lord... cease this agony of self-doubt and fear.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
256 Posts
I thought when you were a kid you would have figured social=better in people's head.

I mean even as a kid there was that weird kid who kept to himself that we bullied and treated badly because he was an antisocial weirdo.

In other words better work on them social skills because you better have a good degree and credentials if you want a job otherwise.Im serious JOBS dont really care about your grades all they care about is your credentials and HOW MUCH THEY LIKE YOU.Get social connections to get easy job offers.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
34 Posts
I absolutely agree. I sure wish I could get away with doing less work by being more social. I'm on the other end, just learning more stuff but because I seem more "timid" I am watched much more closely.

I've left three jobs so far because of the **** treatment I got and couldn't take it. I did stay as long as possible. The most I could take it 3 years at one location. That was one hell of a long job. I'm being "scolded" (how humiliating) for **** that isn't even my problem sometimes and I feel like it's just because they think I'll take it. I'm not very confrontational so when people get all *****y at me, I won't retaliate on the spot and will react only later. Like say a couple hours.
 

·
Dubstepper
Joined
·
339 Posts
Discussion Starter · #15 ·
I thought when you were a kid you would have figured social=better in people's head.

I mean even as a kid there was that weird kid who kept to himself that we bullied and treated badly because he was an antisocial weirdo.

In other words better work on them social skills because you better have a good degree and credentials if you want a job otherwise.Im serious JOBS dont really care about your grades all they care about is your credentials and HOW MUCH THEY LIKE YOU.Get social connections to get easy job offers.
Yeah, but I am fairly social at work, just relatively quiet compared to the person I mentioned in the OP, it's not like I just don't talk at all. I talk to almost everyone there when I worked there, it's just that most times I would rather focus on work than to socialize the whole time.

Although this boss was probably a bad example, he was quite a moron and an *******, bad combination. People only tolerated his childlike behavior and socialized with him because he was a giant 7 foot looking walrus. I'd love to see how humiliated he would be at a job that requires any intelligence.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,372 Posts
You know what's really sad? I read an article once that said a study was done and they found that bosses are more likely to hire people who 1) they want to be friends with and/or 2) they are physically attracted to. Over whether they are good workers or not. People are pathetic! and I'm completely screwed lol
well, hell, tell the boss to just hire a f***in' hooker! Those ladies that wear the short dresses, high heels, and dyeing their hair? Yes.. it seems like they have the right idea.:yes

but it's also, wrong on so many levels... and yes, i totally agree, it's pathetic, but that's just the way it's been since the age of industry..

:blank
 

·
The Last Outlaw
Joined
·
1,176 Posts
I have to admit to being envious of our office 'darling' as he gets away with doing nothing at all. The boss worships the ground he walks on, is constantly ignoring his mistakes and giving him perks like extra leave or longer breaks. Meanwhile some of us (mostly me) are treated with indifference at best, despite completing more work and making three times as many sales.

I think the worst is that when office favourite walks into the room everyone is screaming out greetings and smiling big grins. When I walk in, I'm lucky to get eye contact or a response to my hellos!
 

·
You spoony bard!
Joined
·
8,729 Posts
I've come to realize jobs these days are designed as a temporary thing.. You can bust your *** and they won't remember that, they might remember if you slack enough to hold others back but really there is no way the guys 4 tiers up the chain are ever going to give a **** if you showed up 10 minutes early every day and worked through lunch to make the company tons more money. The only thing they will remember is the dirty jokes and martinis and who they liked, and also when you switch jobs the better referral you can get the more likely you can start at higher pay and get the better jobs down the road. Its a game, and a game designed to really screw most of the workers - ultimately you can burn yourself out on some stupid task nobody will ever remember, or play the game like the game it is and work it in your favor.
 

·
The Last Outlaw
Joined
·
1,176 Posts
The only thing they will remember is the dirty jokes and martinis and who they liked, and also when you switch jobs the better referral you can get the more likely you can start at higher pay and get the better jobs down the road.
Sad but true. The social darlings will climb the job ladder in days, seen many a lazy bum get promoted because they drink at the same bar as the boss.
 
1 - 19 of 19 Posts
Top