Just wandered onto this website searching for some information and support. I feel I have reached a point where I need to make some changes and hopefully live more of a "normal" life. Today was like the last straw. My father in law, who is also the pastor of our church, asked me why it is so hard for me to just walk into a room full of people and not even say hello....just sit down and not say a word between the time I arrive and the time I leave. He made me realize how much this SA has actually taken over my life. Before today I honestly didn't think there was anything wrong with my behavior. I gave him excuses such as, "I don't want to say anything while everyone is being quiet" or "I don't want to interrupt someone's conversation". The truth is I avoid conversation and being in front of people at all costs because I have a huge, ginormous fear of rejection constantly looming over me. Hopefully here I can find some new friends, and people that understand exactly what I'm going through.
