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Hi all,

This is my first post on this site. I"m looking for some advice on my situation from people who've gone through these things. To start, I've had Social anxiety for I'd say since I was 11 and Im now 24. I played sports in school and it affected me a lot, made me run funny and self concience. After high school, I went to college and felt that I was over it for the most part. I dated a ton of women that I met online, partied, etc. THings were looking good for me at this point. Since college, I've kind of hit rock bottom. I moved out of my parents house, and now I basically dont do much at all. I work at a large cooporation, am tall, good looking making good money, have a nice car, got my own place, 51 inch tv, good clothes, pretty much I have everything materialistic that I could ever want, but I'm really suffering mentally. At work, I'm super shy and very awkward, and everyone knows this. I sit at my desk all day to avoid people because it always turns out negative. I stutter, cant speak clearly at all these days, cant conversate well without it turning awkward, and I get very tense and feel awkward around people in public places. I want to get over this so that I can start living again. I want to start living a fulfilling life, but I feel trapped. I have a lot of stuttering books and Social anxiety books and things on confidence, along with most pickup women products, and the Thomas richards overcoming social anxiety tapes. Does anyone have any advice for me. I want to dedicate the next 2-3 years of my life to fixing myself so that I can enjoy life.
Thanks
 

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Banned
Joined
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139 Posts
Hi all,

This is my first post on this site. I"m looking for some advice on my situation from people who've gone through these things. To start, I've had Social anxiety for I'd say since I was 11 and Im now 24. I played sports in school and it affected me a lot, made me run funny and self concience. After high school, I went to college and felt that I was over it for the most part. I dated a ton of women that I met online, partied, etc. THings were looking good for me at this point. Since college, I've kind of hit rock bottom. I moved out of my parents house, and now I basically dont do much at all. I work at a large cooporation, am tall, good looking making good money, have a nice car, got my own place, 51 inch tv, good clothes, pretty much I have everything materialistic that I could ever want, but I'm really suffering mentally. At work, I'm super shy and very awkward, and everyone knows this. I sit at my desk all day to avoid people because it always turns out negative. I stutter, cant speak clearly at all these days, cant conversate well without it turning awkward, and I get very tense and feel awkward around people in public places. I want to get over this so that I can start living again. I want to start living a fulfilling life, but I feel trapped. I have a lot of stuttering books and Social anxiety books and things on confidence, along with most pickup women products, and the Thomas richards overcoming social anxiety tapes. Does anyone have any advice for me. I want to dedicate the next 2-3 years of my life to fixing myself so that I can enjoy life.
Thanks
I can relate to your post a lot.

I'm good-looking, turn heads, college graduate, great clothes, nice cars, had a good job with a major Fortune 500 company, and I had every problem at work you've mentioned.

I also stutter. On that front, there's some positive developments. Pagoclone, a medication for stuttering, is in the last trial stage of tests currently being conducted by the FDA. It looks very promising. Most stutterers who have taken it have noticed significant improvement in their fluency. So, it's somewhat conceivable this drug could be on pharmacy shelves in a matter of a few short years. I suppose we shouldn't get our hopes up too high. Murphy's Law? But this news is encouraging.

Pagoclone is an anxiety medication, too. Thankfully, some stutterers started taking it in a research setting and their stuttering improved. So this drug may kill two birds with one stone for stutterers with anxiety.

I would guess you have depression. I couldn't hazard a guess as to the degree of your depression. If you were suffering from major depression, you most likely couldn't be working. Unless you're taking an antidepressant.

I would recommend you seek counseling. I know the thought of that is frightening. I was shaking like a leaf the first time I saw a counselor.

I do think there's reason for hope. You've just hit a big bump in the road. You're still young, and you've had a lot of stressful events. At an earlier point in time, you were dating tons of people. So you must have been doing something right. Looks isn't everything.

Good luck! I know exactly what you're going through and it's not easy.
 

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My advice, would be to try and change your perceptions first. You might talk or stay inside your head because you fear something. Wether it be what people think of you, what ever. You have to first change that way of thinking realize and enforce in your thoughts that your a cool dude, and it doesn't matter if someone doesn't like you or if you make a fool out of yourself. Then work on feeling comfortable alone, that can mean alone in a public place or by yourself. Just work on being relaxed and change your perspective and negative thinking. baby steps.
 
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