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Buried at Sea
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5,104 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
Every time I'm in the grocery store I go down the cheese aisle. Now, I don't like cheese. In fact I hate it. It's gross unless it's well disguised on a pizza or in a sandwich.

No, I go down the cheese aisle so I can poke the cheese. Not the boring cheese like cheddar and mozzarella. I poke the weird, lumpy, squishy, misshapen cheeses. I don't know why. I have a morbid fascination with the texture of cheese apparently.

So there you have it. If you ever see little dents in your cheese when you buy it, it was probably me. I'm a cheese poker. May God have mercy on my soul.
 

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She-Wolf
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5,985 Posts
OOOOOH something i ****ing love, is when there is a big basket of some very small grains of some sort. only do this to when it is on an outdoor supermarket where no one notices.

i lovvvvve dunking my hand into and just letting my hand swim through it. it feels so relaxing, almost like it's in water but its not. it's like a hand and forearm massage.

it may sound dirty to spread the germs of my grimey hands all through the rice, but hey, feels good man.
 

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ಠ ¿ ಠ
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913 Posts
I admit that I must cut my cheese cubes in half three times in order to get eight proportionate smaller cubes; also, they must be Monterey Jack cheese cubes. Otherwise, I cannot eat them, or feel strangely uncomfortable and out-of-place doing so.
 

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Poorly Educated
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4,912 Posts
I feel disgusted whenever I shop for fresh peaches. It seems some people feel it's perfectly acceptable to press their fingernails into the skin and puncture it to check if they are ripe, then put it back and take a different one. I always have to sort through them to find the ones without the fingernail holes in the skin. :puke
 

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resident classicist
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4,408 Posts
I feel disgusted whenever I shop for fresh peaches. It seems some people feel it's perfectly acceptable to press their fingernails into the skin and puncture it to check if they are ripe, then put it back and take a different one. I always have to sort through them to find the ones without the fingernail holes in the skin. :puke
I've always felt like the best way to check ripeness of peaches is just sniff it, and if it smells *strongly* of peach, then it's good.

But yeah, the peach pokers really ruin it.
 

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breaking free
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2,171 Posts
:haha Poking cheese!

Have you ever seen those candles at Target that are squishy and look like they are made out of Jello? I love poking those.
 

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giggling ******
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11,070 Posts
I was cured at an early age of poking, when the noodles broke out and spilled over the floor of the market. I never poked a thing a gain.
 

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Registered
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Hehe you are in Ontario too, like me.

I wish I hated cheese. I would be so much thinner lol
 

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insert witty comment here
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6,159 Posts
I used to have this desire to stick my hand into a brand new, just opened tub of Nivea creme and then slowly make a fist so that all the creme would be squeezed through the gaps between my fingers.

I once did that. I was just as I thought it would be. Totally cured me of this weird desire too! lol
 

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Buried at Sea
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5,104 Posts
Discussion Starter #12
Reminds me of this guy from a while back: http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=95671&page=1
As a reporter when else are you going to be able to write about "squeezings" and "bakery assaults?" I bet the whole newsroom gets together to think up puns to use.

Also, I should note that no cheese is harmed during the poking. It's very spring-y and goes right back into shape. Strictly poke and release.
 

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:lol Do you look after chimps? It almost sounds like the kind of thing they would do!

When I was in college, I kept an orange for a bit longer than I should have, and it turned squishy and rubbery. My room-mate and I spent quite a while throwing it around the room and up against the wall to try to make it burst. But it didn't work, and we were so disappointed!
 

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She-Wolf
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okay another confession that i'm a bit embarrassed about

i really can't enjoy tom waits. i don't know why. i just can't. i listen to rain dogs sometimes but i can't even get through it. it might be his voice, but i like a number of musicians whose voices are pretty crummy so it's not a big deal. it's not his songwriting, since it's not bad of course. i just can't get into him. when i discuss music with people who have similar taste to me and the topic of waits comes up, they talk about how great it is and it they ask whether i've listened to him i have to say in a quiet voice with an embarrassed smirk on my face that i have many times, and i don't like him.
 

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Buried at Sea
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5,104 Posts
Discussion Starter #19
okay another confession that i'm a bit embarrassed about

i really can't enjoy tom waits. i don't know why. i just can't. i listen to rain dogs sometimes but i can't even get through it. it might be his voice, but i like a number of musicians whose voices are pretty crummy so it's not a big deal. it's not his songwriting, since it's not bad of course. i just can't get into him. when i discuss music with people who have similar taste to me and the topic of waits comes up, they talk about how great it is and it they ask whether i've listened to him i have to say in a quiet voice with an embarrassed smirk on my face that i have many times, and i don't like him.
A bold confession, considering how rabid Tom Waits fans are. I'm a huge fan, but I understand where you're coming from. Sometimes his affectations are a little much.
 
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