[anonymouspacket]

Hi guys,

I know this is probably going to sound crazy but I'm curious: do you ever find yourself anticipating social interactions before they happen... and mutter things that you might say so you can analyze it and determine if it sounds normal?

I'll do that from time to time.

-AP

 

[Jumplittlelisa]

Hi guys,

I know this is probably going to sound crazy but I'm curious: do you ever find yourself anticipating social interactions before they happen... and mutter things that you might say so you can analyze it and determine if it sounds normal?

I'll do that from time to time.

-AP

I have to meet with four people I've never met on Monday for a dinner meeting. I have no idea who they are, but they are expecting me. I'm incredibly nervous. I've been worried about it since the day I received the email.

Then on Tuesday, I have an interview for an internship. I'm really worried and hesitant to go. So yeah, I can sympathize with you on anticipating a social situation.

I suppose I plan my conversations so that I'm not caught off guard but there is no way to plan for that unfortunately.

 

[LALoner]

Hi guys,

I know this is probably going to sound crazy but I'm curious: do you ever find yourself anticipating social interactions before they happen... and mutter things that you might say so you can analyze it and determine if it sounds normal?

I'll do that from time to time.

-AP

All the time, its horrible. Its horrible because it uses up your time and it doesn't help you. Things never happen the way you expect.

 

[irvanm87]

same here, and everytime i do this, when the real conversation does come..it gets really awkward because the responses i had in my mind is based on what i ASSUME the other person is going to talk/ask about...which is never the same as what they actually say or ask.

i came up on a quote that helped me a little with this problem.

"live in the moment, do NOT anticipate the future"

 

[miminka]

AH! YES I DO THAT! I think of things like, if someone asked me why I'm walking down the stairs I would say something like, "Well, it's the most efficient way to get to my locker" or, "Why are you walking so trepidiously down the stairs?" and I would reply, "To avoid cascading down the stairs from tripping on scattered debris" Well of course no one asks me that, because they don't care and they're not interested in my daily goings-on. I know those were both about stairs but those were my examples.

 

[shocksleeper]

I've wasted too much of my life doing this. It's dumb, but it makes me feel better somehow, if only while I'm doing it...things never work out the way you imagine.

It's also really disappointing, because my imagined conversations are usually so much more interesting.

 

[numero1]

What about those intimate situations where you're one on one with a girl/boy, in my case a girl....? I have recited conversations in my head hundreds of times on how to ask a girl out, but when the time comes, I choke.

 

[nzchick]

Hi guys,

I know this is probably going to sound crazy but I'm curious: do you ever find yourself anticipating social interactions before they happen... and mutter things that you might say so you can analyze it and determine if it sounds normal?

I'll do that from time to time.

-AP

yes!! i do that all the time lol.. but it never turns out the way i expected it to. and so really i'm just wasting my time trying to plan it out in the first place ><

 

[jblazer]

I've wasted too much of my life doing this. It's dumb, but it makes me feel better somehow, if only while I'm doing it...things never work out the way you imagine.

It's also really disappointing, because my imagined conversations are usually so much more interesting.

Hah yeah I hear that, when I actually do get to talk I just turn into a machine "Good morning ""Yes" "Thank you" "Bye"

I could probably surprise people more so then most if I just learned to speak my mind without second guessing.

 

[shocksleeper]

Yeah, plus...they are never as interested in me as I thought they might be.

 

[irvanm87]

i KNOW for a fact the more you think about it and imagine it...the more you psych yourself out...but even after knowing this..i still fall victim to it...

 

[confused417]

yeah, 95% of the things i say, i ran through a filter through my head 4 or 5 times first... and can't say anything spontaniously, i might screw something up

 

[madee]

Actually, you know what, I kind of do the opposite. I replay conversations and situations in my head and then think over what I should have said instead, and will mutter those conversations that happened to myself. Apparently I sometimes will even make facial expressions and hand gestures when I'm thinking really hard about it (I have a friend who took a class with me and said he would frequently look across the room and see me making faces/ gesturing at absolutely nobody).

Anyone else do this?

 

[madee]

I do, though, extensively plan out how I think a certain situation is going to go. But I always imagine it to be a lot better than it really is. I think it's more daydreaming than anything.

 

[damfino]

I do this all the time as well. Usually, it's when I have to make a phone call to a company (cable company, credit card, etc.). I usually write stuff down beforehand so I remember to mention certain things because when I'm involved in live conversation, I'm usually too anxious to actually come up with a meaningful and thoughtful response on the fly.

 

[numero1]

All day, every day. I always replay the scenario in my head before it happens, but the actual scenario never happens because I hardly initiate conversation for fear of rejection. Most of the scenarios that I play over in my head are dealing with meeting new people especially girls.

 

[madee]

I do this all the time as well. Usually, it's when I have to make a phone call to a company (cable company, credit card, etc.). I usually write stuff down beforehand so I remember to mention certain things because when I'm involved in live conversation, I'm usually too anxious to actually come up with a meaningful and thoughtful response on the fly.

Oooh, yeah, I do that. Especially if I have to make a really hard call. Sometimes people can tell I'm reading, I think.

 

[shocksleeper]

Actually, you know what, I kind of do the opposite. I replay conversations and situations in my head and then think over what I should have said instead, and will mutter those conversations that happened to myself. Apparently I sometimes will even make facial expressions and hand gestures when I'm thinking really hard about it (I have a friend who took a class with me and said he would frequently look across the room and see me making faces/ gesturing at absolutely nobody).

Anyone else do this?

I do this! With really upsetting, embarassing situations, and I get really angry while I'm doing it haha, feeling the hatred build up within me again :mum I tend to dwell on things like that and get hyped up on them.

This whole muttering/analyzing thing used to be a really big problem, every morning when I took a shower I would just forget what I was doing and start muttering to myself. Even when I was a kid. I think it came from being really lonely and socially inhibited. I've gotten a lot better at distracting myself but I still find myself drifting off...