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Please don't start a fight in this thread or insult, this is a serious question and I expect you to be respectful and not make this rude just because it's Gwynevere making the thread.

To what extent is it normal for men to touch women they don't know? Most men who talk to me in public don't touch me but I'm also very obvious about the fact that I hate them, and I don't usually pay attention to what other people do in public.

But recently I've noticed quite a few incidents where men put their hands on women they clearly didn't know. I'm not very good at body language and didn't really stick around or stare long enough to know how it turned out or how the women felt about it except one who looked just as uncomfortable as I would have been.

Is this a common thing? Do strange men touch women they just met? Is this something normal that I should be concerned will probably happen?
 

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today's a beautiful day
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noooo... it is not normal that men touch women strangers... at least what i see here... and in my life so far...
i think u shouldn't be afraid of this happenin to u... maybe if u go to some party with lots of drunk ppl.. then maybe
 

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I certainly find public touching of anybody you aren't very familiar with to be quite bizarre, but then again, I'm certainly not the best judge of what is "normal".

Though I do seem to recall it being a big tenet of the "game", touching a woman to indirectly express interest/show confidence/eliminate the friendzone or something like that.
 

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No it's far more common for strange women to touch men they just met and frankly it's a bit creepy.
 

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I can't say I've ever seen this. Most men know that touching a woman they don't know well in any way is absolutely forbidden.
 

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I don't think that's common. I wouldn't touch a woman I just met. It is a little more socially acceptable for women to initiate contact than men though, maybe that occurred first and you didn't see? Otherwise it was a little bold on the guy's part.

I wouldn't worry about it too much either way. It's not normal, except in specific social settings where everybody wants to hug and kiss on the cheek for some reason.
 

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giraffe
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I think it's a cultural thing. Some cultures are very touchy. I haven't been touched by strange men in a creepy way. But some people tend to greet others with hugs or make a point in conversation by poking your arm or something. I don't consider that creepy if it is just their personality/culture.

I did have a teacher in middle school who would go around and put his hands on girls' shoulders. Everyone thought he was creepy.
 

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To what extent is it normal for men to touch women they don't know? Most men who talk to me in public don't touch me but I'm also very obvious about the fact that I hate them, and I don't usually pay attention to what other people do in public.
:um
 

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Stranger men almost never touch me in any way or fashion. I'm not sure if I've even has one extend a hand when meeting for the first time- the last few times I remember, I've been the one to initiate a handshake.

Stranger women are different- it's not uncommon for another woman to pat my hand or something innocuous like that.
 

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Generally, as long as they aren't touching any private areas it wouldn't be considered harmful. I do think the women would find it annoying (I would) if a stranger of the opposite sex touches them without permission and for no good reason. It also depends on the context. In a formal context yeah this is definitely unacceptable, but at a party or club scene its more permissible.
 

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You immediately assumed the evil men, most certainly, have touched those few women just to get to what you think all men are about: ''rape''. It's obviously not like that at all. Some people are more warm, friendly and open. Their body language is simply expressing that. This is done by both men and women. I have usually seen women being more into this sort of touching than men.

It's also a lot more common in other cultures than the american one, as diamondheart mentioned. Shaking hands, touching the shoulder or the forearm briefly, are pretty natural. It's not like they start groping you or dragging you to a corner of the street for the main course.

Assuming the highly unlikely situation in which we would become online friends and, at some point, for some reason, we would meet, not only I would touch you the first time we would meet, but I would also kiss you if you wouldn't faint because of my overwhelming charm and sex-appeal. It is normal to kiss people of any gender on the cheeks if you feel close to each other(especially related, friends), just as a form of warm greeting. :D:yes
 

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I did have a teacher in middle school who would go around and put his hands on girls' shoulders. Everyone thought he was creepy.
Same but in high school, and he only did it with female students.. Luckily I only had that happen to me once... Because he was covering a class. Pretty uncomfortable. Other female students who had him said he was even touchier than just an arm around their shoulder..
 

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I did have a teacher in middle school who would go around and put his hands on girls' shoulders. Everyone thought he was creepy.
Same but in high school, and he only did it with female students.. Luckily I only had that happen to me once... Because he was covering a class. Pretty uncomfortable. Other female students who had him said he was even touchier than just an arm around their shoulder..
:um

I had female teachers petting me, taking me in their arms, telling me sweet things(that was at age 8-9, so don't get creepy on me), touching me on the forearm, shoulder, head, asking me to dance with them, making me compliments and so on(age 13-14).

How come I wasn't freaked out or thought it was creepy? Maybe because I wasn't taught they may do something bad to me? I wasn't told I am vulnerable and bad people will try to take advantage of me?
 

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That stuck out to me too. So much hate, toward people she doesn't even know. Quite antisocial and bitter. "All that hate's gonna burn you up, kid".

Anyway, in our culture, touch isn't that common between unfamiliar people. Speaking as a man, I don't care for touching outside of a romantic or sexual context. Girls love to hug regardless, and I tolerate it but I don't enjoy it. I think most men feel the same way I do about touch.

There are instances where touching is part of communication. In a loud place like a club, it may be necessary to put a hand on the shoulder or on the upper back while yelling over the noise.
 

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giraffe
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:um

I had female teachers petting me, taking me in their arms, telling me sweet things(that was at age 8-9 so don't get creepy on me), touching me on the forearm, shoulder, head, asking me to dance with them, making me compliments and so on(age 13-14).

How come I wasn't freaked out or thought it was creepy? Maybe because I wasn't taught they may do something bad to me? I wasn't told I am vulnerable and bad people will try to take advantage of me?
Or maybe it's because female teachers didn't try to slide their hands down your arm and grope your chest "accidentally" like he did to one girl. Or put their hands on your leg. He was a creep. And at that point no one reported him because we didn't know what he was doing was illegal or bad... we just felt uncomfortable near him.
 

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:um

I had female teachers petting me, taking me in their arms, telling me sweet things(that was at age 8-9 so don't get creepy on me), touching me on the forearm, shoulder, head, asking me to dance with them, making me compliments and so on(age 13-14).

How come I wasn't freaked out or thought it was creepy? Maybe because I wasn't taught they may do something bad to me? I wasn't told I am vulnerable and bad people will try to take advantage of me?
Boys also found it odd, cultural differences.

http://businessculture.org/northern-europe/uk-business-culture/

The people of the UK value their privacy highly. Although they may appear to be very open in public, the implicit message permeating the culture is 'please do not interfere with my personal space'. Although the UK is multi-cultural, this privacy requirement forces many people to be rather wary of making new friends. If a foreigner really wants to adapt to British culture and make some valuable connections, they need to be patient and realise that creating such friendships may take longer than anticipated. The high value put on personal space is also visible in everyday life, as when people will avoid sitting next to someone else on a bus or apologise if they touch someone accidentally.
I don't think putting his arm around my shoulder was a big deal universally, but it made me uncomfortable because it was not the norm for me. However what he potentially did to other female students sounded more like groping but I can't comment on that as that wasn't me.
 

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You immediately assumed the evil men, most certainly, have touched those few women just to get to what you think all men are about: ''rape''. It's obviously not like that at all. Some people are more warm, friendly and open. Their body language is simply expressing that. This is done by both men and women. I have usually seen women being more into this sort of touching than men.

It's also a lot more common in other cultures than the american one, as diamondheart mentioned. Shaking hands, touching the shoulder or the forearm briefly, are pretty natural. It's not like they start groping you or dragging you to a corner of the street for the main course.

Assuming the highly unlikely situation in which we would become online friends and, at some point, for some reason, we would met, not only I would touch you the first time we would met, but I would also kiss you if you wouldn't faint because of my overwhelming charm and sex-appeal. It is normal to kiss people of any gender on the cheeks if you feel close to each other(especially related, friends), just as a form of warm greeting. :D:yes
Haha I like your boldness man! :popcorn
 

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Or maybe it's because female teachers didn't try to slide their hands down your arm and grope your chest "accidentally" like he did to one girl. Or put their hands on your leg. He was a creep. And at that point no one reported him because we didn't know what he was doing was illegal or bad... we just felt uncomfortable near him.
The evidence bears out that female teachers are more apt to engage in sexual activity with their pupils. To say that women don't do the same is to ignore reality. His point still stands.

I'm not sure why that is. It could be because any man who works with children is automatically suspected to begin with and thus he has higher standards for his behavior. Or simply there are many more women in the profession. But it's the way it is.

I'm not saying that your teacher didn't engage in predatory behavior and he should have been fired when he crossed the line.
 
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