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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
School's coming up in 4 days for me. I'm scared to death. Nobody's in my lunch, or any of my classes for that matter. I have no clue how i'm going to deal with this. Who am I going to sit by? Do I just skip lunch and sit in the bathroom the whole period or what..? By the way, in junior high i was considered the quiet girl because I never really talked to anybody and I just stared into space most of my classes so..
 

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with diamonds.
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I did that all through highschool. it's not fun I can tell you...

I would recommend trying to find someone.
 

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i got picked on every day in junior high through sophomore year of high school.

for lunches, i took a walk out to the field and ate there sometimes. sometimes i would try to sit in next period's classroom and eat there - i could feel positive i did not miss class, and i could try to talk to the teacher and get some homework done.
 

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I know there are ways to avoid sitting at lunch, but I honestly wouldn't recommend it. I think facing some fears now and meeting a couple new people this year could really take you a different direction than just avoiding it entirely.

It's tough, but during class try to sit by another quiet or shy looking girl. Maybe ask her what classes she has and whether or not you have the same lunch. Do it in each of your classes and I'm sure you can find someone to sit by. If they say they do have the same lunch just simply ask "Hey, I don't know anyone in lunch at that time, do you think I could sit by you?" I'm sure they'll say yes. Even if you don't talk a whole lot at least you aren't sitting alone or avoiding it entirely.

Like I said, you can go two directions and I'm afraid that if you don't start forcing yourself to go down one path you'll go down the other for years to come. And it can be tough going that way, believe me/all of us on here.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thanks everyone for your replies so far, this is my first year of high school so I don't know if we're allowed to roam everywhere we want during lunch. I was thinking about sitting at a random table that isn't full of popular snobs and just try to go from there, but i'm starting to think that it's not going to be a good idea. The people in my school aren't considered nice people so that's why I need advice. I would like more replies just to make me feel like high school isn't going to be hell.
 

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i spent a lot of my lunch periods hiding from people who were physically hurting me at school. got discovered once, but otherwise, i got to know the campus well, and knew some shortcuts to next period i could take that would not get me seen or beat up.
 

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I'd say sitting alone is a better option than sitting in the bathroom for sure. Less cowardly and if there's anyone nice in your school, if you look inviting, eventually someone will probably come over and eat with you. You can't look like you hate everyone there though.
 

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I would give going to the cafeteria a try. See if you can meet any new people. Maybe you wont meet anyone but maybe you will. At least there will be a chance. There is no chance of making any new friends hiding in the bathroom, i did that in high school. If you try it and its as horrible as you fear then resort to avoiding it but give it a little time.
 

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I'm sure all these replies are appreciated but again, I don't recommend running from this. High school is tough for a lot of people but I think you will do just find if you give it some time.

I highly recommend trying to ask a person or two in each class if they have lunch at the same time and ask to sit with them. I really do NOT think that roaming the halls or hiding in the bathrooom is a good idea your first year of high school - it could set you up for a long 4 years.

Come on guys, this is a website to SUPPORT those who have SA, not a site for us to encourage people to be antisocial and hide! Let's try to be more helpful!
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
I'm sure all these replies are appreciated but again, I don't recommend running from this. High school is tough for a lot of people but I think you will do just find if you give it some time.

I highly recommend trying to ask a person or two in each class if they have lunch at the same time and ask to sit with them. I really do NOT think that roaming the halls or hiding in the bathrooom is a good idea your first year of high school - it could set you up for a long 4 years.

Come on guys, this is a website to SUPPORT those who have SA, not a site for us to encourage people to be antisocial and hide! Let's try to be more helpful!
I agree 100% on this.
 

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insert witty comment here
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I'm sure all these replies are appreciated but again, I don't recommend running from this. High school is tough for a lot of people but I think you will do just find if you give it some time.

I highly recommend trying to ask a person or two in each class if they have lunch at the same time and ask to sit with them. I really do NOT think that roaming the halls or hiding in the bathrooom is a good idea your first year of high school - it could set you up for a long 4 years.

Come on guys, this is a website to SUPPORT those who have SA, not a site for us to encourage people to be antisocial and hide! Let's try to be more helpful!
Good advice.

Aly, good luck :)
 

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I wish I had more solid advice for you on this, as I can recall how tough it can be (I went to several schools growing up, a couple where I didn't know a single person in the entire building). The truth is it's going to be uncomfortable for a while but like I said I think if you stick with it you will find your group. Maybe even just taking a look around the cafeteria that first day or two will give you a good idea of who you could sit by - if there's one or two shy looking ladies at a table I wouldn't hesitate to sit down introduce yourself and ask if you can sit with them.

Good luck! Be sure to come vent to us when you need to or if you just need some support after a tough day.
 

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I think that you need to find it in yourself to be brave and just find a group of that you maybe recognize or look similar to your usual social affiliations and just say "Hey. I don't know anyone in this lunch. Do you mind if I sit with you?" If they say no, they're probably some pretty shallow people, so no loss to you. If they say yes, you've made a bold move and have potentially gained some new friends.

I know how difficult this sounds, but I can assure you that avoiding people by hiding will only worsen your problems later. You want to get this over with as soon as possible. Just need to find the courage to step out of your comfort zone and not care so much what other people think. Do it for you, not for them.
 

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Visualize that people will talk to you!

Close your eyes and just visualize the whole lunch , people talking to you , having a nice time and dont even dare to THINK about anything related to anxiety or anything in that regard!

It will help you , really it will! I am tobbing about it aswell , what the hell am I going to do at lunch breaks?! I figured , I will just go outside , put my iPod on , smoke a cigarette and just come to a relaxed state where nothing else matters! And if my Anxiety rules over it or when I am feeling miserable at some day I will just go for a walk around school , figuring if I need to 'puke' or anything like that I will do it where no one see's it! ( I always feel nauseous , but never actually had to! )

I hope this will help you a bit :3! I really hope it does!

Sorry for my bad English , it is not my native language and I have a tendacy to use : , < that everywhere
 

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If you think you can do it, I say try to sit or talk to some people during lunch. I'm sure you can do it.

Unfortunately, I quit eating lunch in the 9th and 10th grade. I always wound up sitting alone at a table and when people started throwing things at me I decided I shouldn't eat there anymore and just hid in the bathrooms and hallways.

I gave the cafeteria another chance when a girl invited me to sit with her and her friends at lunch, but I realized no one was where she said they would be and realized it was probably just a mean prank to make me look like an idiot standing in the middle of the cafeteria.

I think you'll have a much better chance of meeting people than I did though. I bet you're way better at talking to people than I ever will be.
 

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School's coming up in 4 days for me. I'm scared to death. Nobody's in my lunch, or any of my classes for that matter. I have no clue how i'm going to deal with this. Who am I going to sit by? Do I just skip lunch and sit in the bathroom the whole period or what..? By the way, in junior high i was considered the quiet girl because I never really talked to anybody and I just stared into space most of my classes so..
Ok, I am going to make a suggestion to you. Start by talking to other people and being friendly. In order for things to change, you must change. If you are known for being quiet, not talking to others and starting into space, that is not going to make people feel warm to you. You have to begin to let people know that you are willing to reach out and make friends with others. If you don't, then people will not sit with you at lunch. If you have any friends, try to sit with them at lunch. If you talk, start talking to people and once you meet people who will become your friends, then arrange to sit with these people on a daily basis. Everyone has problems in high school not having someone to sit with. The alternative is sitting in the bathroom which you can do but avoiding this is only going to make it worse for you.
 
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