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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I find it hard to talk to people, my eyes get teary when I'm in public, my voice gets shaky, all the usual SA stuff but most of my social anxiety comes from not looking my age. I'm 26 and I look 18 and I'm not just saying that due to low confidence or low self-esteem but because its fact.

I get commented on how young I look on a daily basis (no exaggeration) so this just reinforces the fact. I dread meeting new people because I'm scared they will ask me my age and whenever I give them a truthful answer they spit out their coffee or make a deal out of how ''Wow you really don't look your age, you look 18''. I can't deal with the humiliation and attention and so now I just lie and tell everyone I'm 19. But then I feel like a fraud, I don't want to a live a lie, it's so frustrating! I feel like I don't get respected, I mean why do they have to make a big deal how young I look yet it gets brought up all the time. When I go to a bar I get stared at a lot and comments like "why are they letting school kids in here now?" I wish I was a normal guy who looked his age. Now I wont go anywhere where there is a chance people will find out my age. For eg. I won't go get a haircut, open a bank account, get a job, go to the doctors, go to a bar just to name a few. What kind of life is this if I can't even do basic things like get a haircut? I'm sorry I'm rambling on here but I've got a lot to get off my chest. I've felt this way since I turned 18. I want to get help but I'm too scared to see a therapist, 8 years later and still have no courage.

I feel like I'm stuck, I mean looking young is something I can't change because it's physical and genetical so I feel helpless. It's getting worse obviously because the older I get the harder it is, I'm getting older but I'm not ageing. Maybe there's something wrong with me?

Does anyone else feel like this? Please Help!
 

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I think you're just a bit confused... it's fine.

I'm 22 and people constantly say that I look like a 15 year old. I get carded all over the place and can only audition for young teenage roles- which seriously limits the amount of jobs that I can take as an actress.

I've heard over and over again that confidence is key in pretty much everything... a confident 16 year old can buy a pack of smokes without I.D, or pick up a case of beer. Not because they look old enough, but because they seem confident in their age, I think.

If you had more confidence in who you were as a person, I'm sure people would change their view of you.
It's much harder than just saying; 'yeah- be confident' and you're magically not socially awkward anymore... I know... but if you can find things little by little that you like about yourself, I'm sure you won't care how you look and people wouldn't judge you in that way.

I've got the same problem. Confidence issues.
Hopefully one day I'll be able to like myself.
 

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I feel the same, im 30 and look a lot younger.

When i first left school and started working people were always asking when my work experience was finishing :roll i would always get asked for i.d. going into bars and buying alcohol, even when i was into early 20's (legal drinking age is 18 over here) although when i was in my mid 20's i started losing my hair so im bald now and i have stubble on my face which both makes me look a bit older, but i still look young and still get people commenting from time to time, although not as much as when i was younger. I also find myself avoiding situations were i'll have to reveal my age to people and also dont tell people how old i am as im sick of people making a big deal out of it.

Its also very difficult to meet girls my own age as they always think im younger than them :afr

The only advice i can offer you is to maybe wear 'older' clothes, i dont know what you wear but i find that when i wear trainers/sportswear i look younger. But when i go out i wear a smart pair of shoes, jacket, jeans and a designer top and people dont really say anything about me looking younger. And maybe dont shave regular, let your bread grow a bit. Maybe shave your hair too.

Good luck mate, i know it really sucks looking younger.
 

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I actually envy you. I'm 28, balding, and could pass for mid 30's. I'd love to look young still (I'd prefer early 20's), so I could go back to university or start a band and not look mature-age... not to trivialize your situation. We're just on 2 different ends of the spectrum, that suck just as hard as each other.
 

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I used to be someone who was mistaken for someone 6-8 years younger. Now with the baldness and wrinkles, I look older than I am. Enjoy it. People pay a lot of money to get what you have naturally.
 

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I have noticed that alot of people (including me) that suffer of a form of SA or shyness looks very young compared to their age
maybe there are a link between SA and looking young :D
 

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^^ maybe it's more of a link between SA and acting young/looking young.

If you walk into a store to buy a bottle of wine. Act nervous. Avoid eye contact. Your bound to get asked for I.D. even if your obviously over the legal age limit (talking about myself here)
 

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Or maybe its because people with SA dont go out much or really do anything so we dont age as fast as other people. :afr
 

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I think the constant worry/stress has aged me more and certainly caused me to go bald quicker. I've gone from looking mid-20's to 30-something within about 18 months. It just so happens that I've been stress-out/depressed like never before during this period. Real gut-wrenching, "I'm old and my future is actually ****ed" type stress.
 
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Yes I read the sun ages the skin not drinking, not using drugs, not partying hard not staying up late all the time helps too have you seen recent pictures of Lindsay Lohan? I used to think she was so beautiful her lifestyle has taken a toll on her looks she looks so much older now.

Or maybe its because people with SA dont go out much or really do anything so we dont age as fast as other people. :afr
 

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I'm 27 and people say I look 15 or 16. It's a serious shot to my confidence, and makes me feel inferior to other college students, even those that are 19-21 years old. I always feel like they're judging me for being younger, when in fact I'm much older than them.

It's gotten to the point where, although I hate facial hair, I'm growing a full length beard out. I'm about a week into it, and even though it will look like crap for a while, I'm not going to shave. I'd rather look like a bum than look like a 15 year old KID. :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
If I could grow facial hair I would in a heartbeat but I can't except for a bit of a goatee :( Because I know if I could grow facial hair and look older it would give me a confidence boost. It just plain sucks
 

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Looking young sucks.

I'm almost 21, but I guess I look around 15. Having pretty much no facial hair doesn't help matters. If I could grow some, it would make me look a bit older.
 

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Yeah I've got this problem as well.

I think dressing differently might help? I see some guys who look very young, but you wouldn't think that immediately when looking at them because they dress well and groom well. Maybe investing in some more stylish/mature clothing could be one way to protray being older when the natural looks aren't helping in that department.

I think this is something I'm gonna try to pursue.
 

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I also look REALLY young. Whenever I tell people my age or get IDed I just laugh it off or make a joke about it. When someone is surprised by my age I'll say "I have good genes" or "I'm not actually 16." Yeah kinda lame but you can diffuse any awkward situation with humor.
 

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I am the same. I'm 19 but look like I'm 16.
So far no good has come from it.
 

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looking young is a good thingg. i'm 20 about to turn 21 and people mistake my 17 year old brother and i for the same person. confidence combined with a youthful look works really well for me. try to view looking young as a healthy thing. and actually respond to looking young in a healthy way. with confidence. the only time it gets awkward is when i get looks or hit on by really young girls
 

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I have the same problem! I am also 26 and I get carded for everything - cigarettes, liquor, even R-rated movies. One thing I've learned that can make me look older is changing the way I dress. Keeping in style helps.
 
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