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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
hi i'm new here,

had social anxiety pretty much all my life,since I left school I've tried various jobs and types of job but have never found anything I could do with my condition without feelings of panic and constant anxiety.I currently live at home with my father and have done for about 12 years now and at the moment I am claiming esa.

I think I should be moving out, infact I have been saying I should for nearly 10 years now, but I've never been able to hold down a job for long enough.I think i'm not helping myself by living with my father, he is a very difficult person to live with, he is always angry and moody, i can't spend too long around him,as we don't get on. we are polite to each other but thats all. we pretty much live in different parts of the house and always have done. i have difficulty being around anyone too long but it seems like things are worse being around my father.my mother doesn't want me to live with her she is not interested in me or my problems. so I think to help myself more perhaps I should be moving out?

I'm not sure if things will be any better for my anxiety if I move out though, what if I have to house share? some people might not understand me if I lock myself away from them.I can barely cope living in a large house with one other person what if I have to share a small area with more people? i'd go to pieces as thats what happens often in social situations.the difference being if i'm in a social situation and anxiety gets to much I can atleast leave and go home but if i'm in a claustrophobic living space then i'll have no where to go.

can I get a place where its just me living on my own? i'm not too bothered about size just as long as i'm not too close to other people.
I don't really know how to approach the situation though? how do I get my own place while claiming esa? does anyone have any first hand knowledge or experience they could share.

thanks.
 

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HaloOfDarkness
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608 Posts
A studio apartment if you have them in your area are usually cheapest but quite small. If you feel that moving out would make you happier then thats definitely something you should do. Do you currently have income coming in. Can you afford to pay rent without employment or can your Dad help you out? Campgrounds are pretty cheap to live on as well.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
hi inna sense and organicwildroot

thanks,for the welcome.i have put in a claim for benefit since sa is getting in the way of me finding employment.i can't even be outside of the house for too long at the moment,i stay in my room most of the time.the only time i go out is to quickly buy stuff i need to survive ,but my father does that most of the time.he has supported me at times when i haven't been in work or been claiming benefit.

I feel a bit low when i think about claiming benefit or even getting a place which will be supported by those benefits but I feel like i'm running out of options.my father is retired just recently (in the last month) and hes been reminding and telling me how he needs more money coming in as this house we live in is very big...

I said to him that it might be a better option for me to move out to smaller accommodation and claim benefit.but I don't know how it will work or if its possible for me to do that? a studio flat would be fine. i live in the uk and at the moment i am claiming esa ,so if i move out it would need to be a claim for housing benefit, i don't have any other income.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
bump, has anyone gone through a similar situation to get a small place? how difficult was it? and what did you have to do. I'm not sure how to go about this, I have put in my claim for employment support allowance at the end of june (it used to be called incapacity benefit) and I'm still waiting for payment, I have phoned them more than once and they assure me that they are sorting it out. but what if I change my living arrangements? how could I even pay for myself to live as that would probably mess up the whole claim and I'd have to go months waiting for it to be sorted again. I'm just lucky my father can support me while they are doing all the paperwork. maybe I'll have to use my whole overdraft? or get a loan?
 
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