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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Now I'm sure we can all agree that SA restricts almost everything we do involving social situations.

I've recently become aware that it's becoming harder and harder for me to leave the house to do the simplest of tasks such as going to the shops and even answering the door.

I passed my driving test about 2 months ago and was lucky enough that my parents bought me a car so I could start getting out and about a bit more.

I do try to go out at least once a day; whether it's just to the local shop to get something for lunch, or whether it's for something that keeps me out for a longer duration of time.

Today, since my parents are away for the weekend, and there is no food in the house, I planned on going out to pick something up for dinner. It got to that time, and I realised I'd prefer not to eat anything at all than leave the house. I couldn't even pluck up the courage to go through a drive through.

Feeling a bit **** to be honest.

Anyone else in a similiar situation?
 

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I'm right there with you.

However, the past few days I've been forcing myself to go up to the lake and swim by myself in front of people. It's hard, but I'm trying to do more things I'm uncomfortable with these days.

Sometimes you have to force it, and that's the best you can do.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I'm right there with you.

However, the past few days I've been forcing myself to go up to the lake and swim by myself in front of people. It's hard, but I'm trying to do more things I'm uncomfortable with these days.

Sometimes you have to force it, and that's the best you can do.
Ahhh. Way to go on the swimming in front of people thing; there's no way in hell I'd be able to do that at the moment.

I, like all other SA members love my comfort zones. :)

I guess it's just a case of doing it and realising the benefits rather than the drawbacks? :stu
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I used to get that problem when the neighbors would be outside. I think the only thing you can do is to focus on yourself and try not to pay attention to your surroundings.
Yeah, I get that. I have a next door neighbour who is only a year older than me. He's always outside cleaning his car (usually with his mates). I generally tend to wait for them all to leave before I venture outside.

It's only when leaving the house definitely needs to be done that I will when other people are about. Annoyingly I'm left flustered when I'm out of the situation.

Frustratinggg. :blank
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
ive been in that slump the past couple weeks, went to the park the past couple days though.

try going out late at night, and then the next day go out a bit earlier etc.
Thanks for the advice :)

I have noticed that going out at night is a lot less anxiety provoking than during the daytime.

Will attempt to give it a go. :yes
 

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Now I'm sure we can all agree that SA restricts almost everything we do involving social situations.

I've recently become aware that it's becoming harder and harder for me to leave the house to do the simplest of tasks such as going to the shops and even answering the door.

I passed my driving test about 2 months ago and was lucky enough that my parents bought me a car so I could start getting out and about a bit more.

I do try to go out at least once a day; whether it's just to the local shop to get something for lunch, or whether it's for something that keeps me out for a longer duration of time.

Today, since my parents are away for the weekend, and there is no food in the house, I planned on going out to pick something up for dinner. It got to that time, and I realised I'd prefer not to eat anything at all than leave the house. I couldn't even pluck up the courage to go through a drive through.

Feeling a bit **** to be honest.

Anyone else in a similiar situation?


Yeah I went through several months where I'd only leave the house to get food every few days or going to work. On weeks off, it was almost all day inside, and each day made it harder and harder to get out and get laundry done or get water etc... so the longer I was inside the harder it was for me to get out, and when I finally did get out it was so awkward and uncomfortable. Unless it was at night and I felt the protective darkness... odd i know, but i usually foraged for food at corner groceries at night time.

I did get creative with my cooking almost utilizing anything in the house :D

But i realized that if you force yourself a little bit at a time, it does get easier. So one day I'd get out in the early morning to do some grocery shopping (when it wasn't super crowded), then the next day i could get out and do laundry in the afternoon (I'd get there dump my laundry in, go walk back home do whatever for half hour and come back), and the day after that get a haircut in the middle of the day. Dreading a bad haircut and a long conversation with the barber used to be difficult for me, but after accomplishing the first two feats, the haircut seemed easier.

In the end I had to weigh the fear of getting out there versus not being productive or even wearing used underwear (and yes I went through times where i hand washed a few pairs to procrastinate going to the laundromat). Its hard to find the motivation when its so comfortable inside, but coming home with fresh food, clean laundry, and a tank full of gas will give you a sense of accomplishment and encouragement to do more with it.

so all i can say is that with baby steps it gets easier, but long stretches at home takes you some steps backwards.
 

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Ahhh. Way to go on the swimming in front of people thing; there's no way in hell I'd be able to do that at the moment.

I, like all other SA members love my comfort zones. :)

I guess it's just a case of doing it and realising the benefits rather than the drawbacks? :stu
Thank you :D I've been pretty proud.

Although yesterday my clothes were covered in ants when I put them on and I caught some unwanted attention dancing around. :afr
 

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Today, since my parents are away for the weekend, and there is no food in the house, I planned on going out to pick something up for dinner. It got to that time, and I realised I'd prefer not to eat anything at all than leave the house. I couldn't even pluck up the courage to go through a drive through.
My SA is much milder than yours. I've never had it as bad as you do.
 

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I think I've sort of been conditioned to get used to leaving the house because I'm required to go dog walking my dad and sister every night. I wouldn't say I'm not anxious during it, but I'm probably a lot more comfortable getting out and walking around then I would be if I never left the house.

Although... right now I'm avoiding going to the grocery store. ):
 

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Yeah, I can relate completely. Btw, I love your avatar and username- the yeah yeah yeahs are awesome :p

It's beginning to require so much effort just for me to get out the house, and as soon as I get into public the panic sets in. I do hate sa, lol. I need to go shopping, but I keep procrastinating as usual. Usually I get my sister to do my shopping for me, haha. I'm going to force myself to go tomorrow.
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Yeah, I can relate completely. Btw, I love your avatar and username- the yeah yeah yeahs are awesome :p

It's beginning to require so much effort just for me to get out the house, and as soon as I get into public the panic sets in. I do hate sa, lol. I need to go shopping, but I keep procrastinating as usual. Usually I get my sister to do my shopping for me, haha. I'm going to force myself to go tomorrow.
They are awesome, and I loveee the song. :)

I sometimes get people to shop for me as well. Or even easier, I do it on the internet. I know, it's bad really considering it won't get any better if I'm not prepared to help myself.

I'm planning on forcing myself out tomorrow though so we shall see how it goes. :yes
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Yeah I went through several months where I'd only leave the house to get food every few days or going to work. On weeks off, it was almost all day inside, and each day made it harder and harder to get out and get laundry done or get water etc... so the longer I was inside the harder it was for me to get out, and when I finally did get out it was so awkward and uncomfortable. Unless it was at night and I felt the protective darkness... odd i know, but i usually foraged for food at corner groceries at night time.

I did get creative with my cooking almost utilizing anything in the house :D

But i realized that if you force yourself a little bit at a time, it does get easier. So one day I'd get out in the early morning to do some grocery shopping (when it wasn't super crowded), then the next day i could get out and do laundry in the afternoon (I'd get there dump my laundry in, go walk back home do whatever for half hour and come back), and the day after that get a haircut in the middle of the day. Dreading a bad haircut and a long conversation with the barber used to be difficult for me, but after accomplishing the first two feats, the haircut seemed easier.

In the end I had to weigh the fear of getting out there versus not being productive or even wearing used underwear (and yes I went through times where i hand washed a few pairs to procrastinate going to the laundromat). Its hard to find the motivation when its so comfortable inside, but coming home with fresh food, clean laundry, and a tank full of gas will give you a sense of accomplishment and encouragement to do more with it.

so all i can say is that with baby steps it gets easier, but long stretches at home takes you some steps backwards.
The darkness thing applies to me too :) Somehow it feels like less eyes are on me when there isn't much light about.

And I know what you mean about weighing out the fear versus not being productive. Sometimes things have to be done, whether we want to do them or not. Those are the things I try to concentrate on. Like family gatherings for instance.

Anyway, baby steps is a good start. Thanks for the advice :)
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
I think I've sort of been conditioned to get used to leaving the house because I'm required to go dog walking my dad and sister every night. I wouldn't say I'm not anxious during it, but I'm probably a lot more comfortable getting out and walking around then I would be if I never left the house.

Although... right now I'm avoiding going to the grocery store. ):
Okay so eventually I did go out (albeit not that far) tonight to get something for dinner.

Just like joejoe said in an earlier post, baby steps.

I hope you get to the grocery store at some point :)
 

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once a day? i'm lucky if i get out of the house once a week. and when i do, i have to spend and hour getting ready and staring in the mirror so i don't look ''too awful'' which would cause even MORE people to stare at me. But yeah, i don't like leaving the house either, at least when i'm in my house away from people no one can ridicule me or stare at me or judge me or talk to me. that just causes way too much anxiety. :(
 

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Ordering online and having it delivered still takes some effort: you need to answer the door and interact with the delivery person. You need to eat so don't feel bad if you have to do this until your parents get back. Then you can work on getting out more. Once you are outside and going somewhere are things manageable or do you still feel terrible and want to return home as soon as possible?

Also you might want to invite a friend or family member over so you can take your mind off your anxiety/loneliness.
 
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