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Hi, (just to let you know this is my first post)

I'm not going to tell you about my background as I have put some of that in my profile but let me tell you what happened on Thursday 3rd April.

A month before my English class got told that we have to do a presentation on anything we like. i chose to do it on Donnie Darko the film. So once the written the speech I was fine. I never thought public speaking was a thing I was scared of. Apparently it is. See my mind says i'm fine but my body is like NOPE.
I stood up and started my speech. I felt my voice tremble. But i carried on and then i didn't know the word for ordering people around. So i stood there in silence do a hand gesture. Looked at my hand and it was shaking like hell. Looked at my hand holding a piece of paper. Shaking like hell. At that point I could tell people saw me being nervous and turning red ( I turn red so much). At the end I had to answer questions from my teacher but no one was really listening (probably talking about me).
When i got home I felt like poo. I hate people knowing i'm embarrassed/nervous. I did the speech in front of about 18-20 people who I don't know that well only met them in September and haven't talked to them much. I also did it in front of a guy I like. Today I feel a bit better knowing i don't have to see them for 2 weeks(Easter holiday).
But now I know i'm getting to a point where i have social anxiety and knowing that will stop me from speaking up again.
Any advice to make me feel better please :)
P.S I don't talk to my family much about my emotional problems as again I feel embarrassed and think i'm not as 'cool' as they thought I was.


Thank You for your time.
 

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Welcome, Zyra! :)
 

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You can't really tell from far away when your body trembles or when your voice is shaky. I rarely notice those things in other people and I bet you everyone is nervous as hell but to me, they always look confident. I remember doing a piano recital, and as I was playing the piano, a boy told his dad that my hands were shaking. Now that was bad.
 

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I too feel like I turn red easily (my face always burns when I have to speak in class/to a stranger), but I've been told that it's not as visible as it feels. Also, people can't tell if your hands/voice are trembling unless it's excessive, and more likely than not, they'd forget all about your presentation by the next day. It's hard to remind yourself that others have a shorter attention span for your failures than you do, but it's very true.
 
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