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I've been here for a while now and know there are people here with different levels of SA. Some more severe than others. There are people here who can't leave their house due to severe social anxiety. Then there are people who are able to function to a degree but still have their moments. Yes, I've had crippling SA before. I am able to do more now but I still have my weaknesses. It depends on the social situation I am in.
 

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God, Family, Homeland
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Yeah most people here are at least able to live their life to some degree. Which is a good thing of course. There's a bunch of us really low functioning people here too. We like to hide though. ;)

I haven't heard from anybody here who's been really crippled by it and got better so far, which is kinda depressing. So I wonder about that too.
I guess it depends on what you mean by "crippled". It impaired my ability to socialize and it impeded my relationships: friendships, romantic, work, and otherwise.

So my social life was indeed quite inhibited. I still forced myself to work and get through school. But I HAD to or risk starvation and homelessness. I didn't have the luxury of having someone support me. You'd be surprised what you can do for survival, regardless of any handicaps you may have.

But I did recover. Though I'm still no social butterfly(but much better than before), my SA is now quite mild. Probably along the levels of what most non-SAers have. It's now just a fleeting feeling and thought pattern that creeps up occasionally that I beat down every time it does.
 

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I guess it depends on what you mean by "crippled". It impaired my ability to socialize and it impeded my relationships: friendships, romantic, work, and otherwise.

So my social life was indeed quite inhibited. I still forced myself to work and get through school. But I HAD to or risk starvation and homelessness. I didn't have the luxury of having someone support me. You'd be surprised what you can do for survival, regardless of any handicaps you may have.

But I did recover. Though I'm still no social butterfly(but much better than before), my SA is now quite mild. Probably along the levels of what most non-SAers have. It's now just a fleeting feeling and thought pattern that creeps up occasionally that I beat down every time it does.
Your story is pretty awesome......I can remember how low you were at one point.
 

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자신을 사랑 해
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I guess it depends on what you mean by "crippled". It impaired my ability to socialize and it impeded my relationships: friendships, romantic, work, and otherwise.

So my social life was indeed quite inhibited. I still forced myself to work and get through school. But I HAD to or risk starvation and homelessness. I didn't have the luxury of having someone support me. You'd be surprised what you can do for survival, regardless of any handicaps you may have.

But I did recover. Though I'm still no social butterfly(but much better than before), my SA is now quite mild. Probably along the levels of what most non-SAers have. It's now just a fleeting feeling and thought pattern that creeps up occasionally that I beat down every time it does.
You make an excellent point. There is an instinct in us to survive, even as scary as that might be. That means forcing ourselves to work, even if we have to take mental health days. We have to feed ourselves. Some of us have little to no support.
 

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mine is crippling, i don't know about the rest of the folks
 

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The majority of us do go out and function in the world. Some of us have relationships, friendships, go to school, or have jobs. Does that mean the SA is milder though?

All of us are here trying to get better. Going to school may be terrifying, and we might throw up before every class, but we fight the anxiety and go because staying home doesn't get us any closer to our goals.

You might be unable to fight your anxiety and go to school at this point. It may be too much for you, you may not have enough motivation, or maybe your SA is just worse than other peoples.

Basically the thing to remember is that this site isn't just filled with people with SA, it's people trying to recover from SA. And that means going out into the world and doing things and fighting that. And it's bizarre to then say 'well he got a job, the anxiety must not have been all that bad' and discount the immense pain involved in putting yourself out there to do that everyday.
 

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God, Family, Homeland
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Your story is pretty awesome......I can remember how low you were at one point.
You make an excellent point. There is an instinct in us to survive, even as scary as that might be. That means forcing ourselves to work, even if we have to take mental health days. We have to feed ourselves. Some of us have little to no support.
In retrospect, it's made me a better person. Stronger, more resilient, and more independent.

Sometimes the answers we seek can only be found in the bottom of a pit. It's been in times of crisis that I've become the most enlightened and found out who I really was. The way back up just reinforces those new truths.

Sometimes pain, as brutal as it can be, is good. Because it can lead us toward bigger and better things.
 

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In retrospect, it's made me a better person. Stronger, more resilient, and more independent.

Sometimes the answers we seek can only be found in the bottom of a pit. It's been in times of crisis that I've become the most enlightened and found out who I really was. The way back up just reinforces those new truths.

Sometimes pain, as brutal as it can be, is good. Because it can lead us toward bigger and better things.
Yes, that is a very wise thing to say and I agree.
 

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Discussion Starter · #29 ·
The majority of us do go out and function in the world. Some of us have relationships, friendships, go to school, or have jobs. Does that mean the SA is milder though?

All of us are here trying to get better. Going to school may be terrifying, and we might throw up before every class, but we fight the anxiety and go because staying home doesn't get us any closer to our goals.

You might be unable to fight your anxiety and go to school at this point. It may be too much for you, you may not have enough motivation, or maybe your SA is just worse than other peoples.

Basically the thing to remember is that this site isn't just filled with people with SA, it's people trying to recover from SA. And that means going out into the world and doing things and fighting that. And it's bizarre to then say 'well he got a job, the anxiety must not have been all that bad' and discount the immense pain involved in putting yourself out there to do that everyday.
Yes, I could go to school/work, get laughed at because of my acne scars and my non-fluent speech. On the other hand I could sit at home and actually be somewhat content. I have been to through school already. The only thing it did was lower myself esteem to the point where I did not even want to be around. Is the battle really worth it? I think not because at the end of the day I will still will be a depressed guy with social anxiety.
 

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Yeah I think I'm very fortunate in a lot of ways. It's only in the last year or so my SA has started to come back. When I went to uni a lot changed for me and I became more independent and tried a lot of new things. But when I first got there... It was just awful. I stayed in halls so we had shared bathrooms and kitchens for a whole floor of us but we had private rooms. My SA was so bad I couldn't go into the kitchen or to the bathroom. It was exactly as bad as it sounds.

I'm so glad and lucky to be able to say I'm not like that anymore. But I live in constant fear that I'll end up like that again. I never want to be like that again. And I see that behaviour more and more these days. Sometimes it's just so much effort to be scared all the time that it really would be easier to just... Not.
 

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I think it might be mild to moderate depending on my mood but no longer severe like it has been at times in the past.. I think, because my level of avoidance is so high I don't often test that out. There are some things I avoid completely so obviously thoughts before doing things is still a massive problem.

But I do usually find things go better than I think when I do them, not always, but usually.

Knowing that has had little to no impact on my avoidant tendencies.
 

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In retrospect, it's made me a better person. Stronger, more resilient, and more independent.

Sometimes the answers we seek can only be found in the bottom of a pit. It's been in times of crisis that I've become the most enlightened and found out who I really was. The way back up just reinforces those new truths.

Sometimes pain, as brutal as it can be, is good. Because it can lead us toward bigger and better things.
You're absolutely right. At my worst points I would have done anything to get rid of my SA and be normal. But now I'm able to see what it's done for me. Yeah, I'll probably never be totally normal but there really are some good things that come out of having SA.

Mainly it means that I'm hyper attuned to every piece of subtext in every conversation... But I promise you, that can sometimes be handy! ;)
 

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But I do usually find things go better than I think when I do them, not always, but usually.

Knowing that has had little to no impact on my avoidant tendencies.
Hahaha, yup. No matter how many times I prove to myself something is okay and fun, I'm still pacing back and forth trying to decide if I'm going to go again the next time, and losing that battle more often than not.
 

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I function in the real world and maintain a social life, but my anxiety is severe. I cry before I do anything, I have panic attacks, I worry constantly that I'm messing up. I get what you mean, but, since it all occurs in the mind, it's hard to judge how severe one person's anxiety is. there was a point when I couldn't function, though, and I guess I got through that period by pure determination. I force myself to do things that make me anxious. I know the anxiety will come, but I put up with it, hoping it will lessen over time.
 

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There are some things I avoid completely so obviously thoughts before doing things is still a massive problem.

But I do usually find things go better than I think when I do them, not always, but usually.

Knowing that has had little to no impact on my avoidant tendencies.
Hahaha, yup. No matter how many times I prove to myself something is okay and fun, I'm still pacing back and forth trying to decide if I'm going to go again the next time, and losing that battle more often than not.
This is one of the most frustrating aspects of the disorder. There are things I KNOW it's irrational to be anxious about, things I KNOW I'd most likely enjoy, things I've even DONE before, sometimes many times even, successfully!...but the anxiety before each experience is just as bad as the first time. :x How come the brain doesn't get desensitized?? Every damn time it's like starting over from scratch.

I guess this is one big reason therapy was such a bust for me...the benefits of exposure only seem to last as long as that current experience. It's like Groundhog Day, only without the benefits of remembering what happened before.
 

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Well, I don't have social anxiety. I can socialize pretty well. I'm pretty upbeat and friendly.

I come on here mostly because the people on here are probably the least spiteful of all the internet.
 

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Mine is very mild now, I force myself out of my comfort zone to achieve that. When I was younger I wouldn't leave my house for weeks out of fear of having to interact with other humans. I just kind of snapped one day and realized something had to give.
 

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Well, I don't have social anxiety. I can socialize pretty well. I'm pretty upbeat and friendly.

I come on here mostly because the people on here are probably the least spiteful of all the internet.
Say what?
 

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Say what?
LOL that's why I still stay on these forums as well. I find solace in this corner of the internet. I love reading the thoughts and ideas of most of the posters on here. It's also comforting to me that this place helped me when my anxiety was at an all-time high.
 

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Say what?
I would be considered, at least by the standards set by people on this site, as "normal." I have a good amount of friends, a happy life, etc.
 
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