I find myself telling others how I don't trust certain people. Is that talking behind someone's back?. I don't really trust anyone and my distrust is constantly being affirmed. Today my friend F was an *******. I left his friend's party early because I had a panic attack and he told me "deal with it". I guess he's tired of hearing my problems. But I was also trying to be casual most of the time. I don't know why this sudden vibe change happened. He seemed pretty hostile. It hurts my feelings because I thought we were pretty close friends. I guess he was just trying to be nice and ran out of sympathy. Is this makin sense? I don't wanna deal with that. I just wanna forget about him, man. It's so frustrating trying to determine who is real. I guess I should've known since he steals and lies a lot. Sorry for posting this dramatic post. I just feel brought down completely. I felt great before I hung out.